A bloke in Kansas robbed a bank just to escape his wife, only to get sentenced to home confinement right back where he started. Meanwhile, a giant alligator in Florida caused chaos by strutting across an intersection like it owned the place. In the Glossy’s, Sabrina Carpenter teases her Coachella headline set, Lindsay Lohan Photoshops herself into her meals, Colin Farrell drops an F-bomb over Taytos, and Selena & Benny’s wedding sounds bougie as hell. We also heard the wildest racehorse names, ranked the craziest My Strange Addictions (yes, including eating ashes), and spun the Wednesday Wheel for a country edition of Povo.

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