Enmeshment is mischaracterized as a loving, loyal, tight-knit family protecting the child. In fact, it is psychological and emotional incest through the parents' behaviors, communication style, and actions and is very similar to codependence.

The parent uses the child for intimacy, companionship, romantic attachment, advice, problem-solving, ego fulfillment, or emotional release. They are primarily unconscious that they have unmet emotional needs and are severely broken because our society and the media have not educated them.

Few parents who are guilty of emotional incest realize they are harming their children. Many of them see themselves as devoted, self-sacrificing parents acting in their children's best interests. What they don't realize is that they are using the relationships to satisfy their own unmet needs.

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