Flying Free

Why Self-Leadership is More Effective Than Being Held Accountable [191]


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How do you feel about accountability? Like it, love it, want some more of it?


Or maybe it’s like medicine to you — icky but necessary.


Hold on to your booty, cause I’ve got an opinion on it too. 


I think it’s a made-up practice that got a “virtue” sticker slapped on it. I think it arrests our development into emotional adulthood. In fact, I’d say accountability does more harm than good. 


And it can never match the power of internal motivation for true, lasting life change.


Christian accountability conditions us to believe:

  • We are helpless and foolish
  • We don’t have the capacity for self-motivation or self-leadership
  • We have to be externally motivated by something outside of ourselves (like pain or the humiliation of confessing our faults/sins/failures)
  • We can't make our own decisions
  • We have to get guidance from and obey other people (who usually have penises)
  • We are flirting with danger if we think independently

Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here

If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list at https://flyingfreesisterhood.com/free-download

You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com

And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher at https://joinflyinghigher.com

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Flying FreeBy Natalie Hoffman

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