If you’ve ever felt unseen, unheard, or like your partner should just know what you need, this conversation is going to change the way you do love.

In this episode, I sit down with Monica Tanner, relationship coach and author of Bad Marriage Advice, to unpack one of the biggest roadblocks to long-term intimacy: the gap between what we need and what we actually share with our partner.

We talk about why asking for what you want can feel risky, how to turn complaints into clear requests, and the simple shifts that make your relationship feel safer, more connected, and more playful again.

• Why so many couples struggle to ask for what they want and what to do instead

• How childhood attachment patterns play out in adult relationships

• The difference between complaining and clearly requesting what you need

• The power of modeling vulnerability instead of demanding it

• How to create emotional safety so both partners can open up

• The “STAY” Framework for deeper vulnerability
  

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Favorite Moments

💬 “Unsaid needs are premeditated resentments.”
💬 “If my partner really loved me, they’d know what I need—that story is killing your connection.”
💬 “It’s not about managing your partner, it’s about helping them win.”
💬 “Model the vulnerability you want to see.”

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Monica Tanner is a relationship coach, podcast host, and author of Bad Marriage Advice, a book that exposes 15 common half-truths that quietly destroy connection (and what to do instead).

You can learn more about her work at monicatanner.com

Grab Monica’s Book: Bad Marriage Advice

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