The Evolved Marriage Podcast

Why Your Partner Doesn’t Know What You Need and How to Fix It With Monica Tanner


Listen Later

If you’ve ever felt unseen, unheard, or like your partner should just know what you need, this conversation is going to change the way you do love.

In this episode, I sit down with Monica Tanner, relationship coach and author of Bad Marriage Advice, to unpack one of the biggest roadblocks to long-term intimacy: the gap between what we need and what we actually share with our partner.

We talk about why asking for what you want can feel risky, how to turn complaints into clear requests, and the simple shifts that make your relationship feel safer, more connected, and more playful again.

  • Why so many couples struggle to ask for what they want and what to do instead

  • How childhood attachment patterns play out in adult relationships

  • The difference between complaining and clearly requesting what you need

  • The power of modeling vulnerability instead of demanding it

  • How to create emotional safety so both partners can open up

  • The “STAY” Framework for deeper vulnerability

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Favorite Moments

💬 “Unsaid needs are premeditated resentments.”
💬 “If my partner really loved me, they’d know what I need—that story is killing your connection.”
💬 “It’s not about managing your partner, it’s about helping them win.”
💬 “Model the vulnerability you want to see.”

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Monica Tanner is a relationship coach, podcast host, and author of Bad Marriage Advice, a book that exposes 15 common half-truths that quietly destroy connection (and what to do instead).

You can learn more about her work at monicatanner.com

Grab Monica’s Book: Bad Marriage Advice

--------------------------------------------------------------------

➡️ Download the FREE Reignite Your Marriage Blueprint:

⁠⁠⁠https://www.evolvedmarriage.com/go⁠⁠⁠

➡️For Couples: Complete your Relationship Assessment

⁠⁠⁠https://form.jotform.com/ericmacdougall85/EMcouples⁠

...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

The Evolved Marriage PodcastBy Kate and Eric MacDougall

  • 4.9
  • 4.9
  • 4.9
  • 4.9
  • 4.9

4.9

24 ratings


More shows like The Evolved Marriage Podcast

View all
Boundless Life by Ben Greenfield

Boundless Life

5,011 Listeners

Focus on the Family Strengthening Marriage Podcast by Focus on the Family

Focus on the Family Strengthening Marriage Podcast

1,881 Listeners

ONE Extraordinary Marriage Show by Tony & Alisa DiLorenzo

ONE Extraordinary Marriage Show

1,752 Listeners

The School of Greatness by Lewis Howes

The School of Greatness

21,089 Listeners

Awesome Marriage Podcast by Dr. Kim Kimberling

Awesome Marriage Podcast

800 Listeners

The Powerful Man Show by Tim Matthews & Doug Holt

The Powerful Man Show

137 Listeners

Dear Dr. Tracy by Cloud10

Dear Dr. Tracy

175 Listeners

You Are Not Broken by Kelly Casperson, MD

You Are Not Broken

1,139 Listeners

Rebuilding Us: Marriage Podcast by Dana Che - Christian Marriage  Coach & Speaker

Rebuilding Us: Marriage Podcast

198 Listeners

The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD by Alexandra Stockwell, MD

The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD

166 Listeners

Kingdom Sexuality by That Sounds Fun Network

Kingdom Sexuality

343 Listeners

The Ultimate Intimacy Podcast by Nick and Amy with The Ultimate Intimacy App

The Ultimate Intimacy Podcast

171 Listeners

Pillow Talks by Vanessa & Xander Marin

Pillow Talks

2,507 Listeners

Crazy Little Thing Called Marriage by Focus on the Family

Crazy Little Thing Called Marriage

23 Listeners

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast by Civility Media

The Jefferson Fisher Podcast

8,475 Listeners