Ilona found Lisa through the Omega Institute and was so inspired by her journey that she joined the Out of the Cave team after going through group coaching! Today she shares her experience of growing up feeling completely disconnected and dissociated from her body as a result of trauma. Ilona and Lisa discuss when weight loss feels unsafe, the impact of trauma in our relationships with food and our bodies, and allowing yourself to speak your truth.

Topics include:

[5:40] Food as comfort from a very young age. Going with her mom to Weight Watchers around 7 or 8, personal perceptions of weight versus looking back at pictures with a more realistic mindset. Growing into a hyperawareness of body image during the normal changes that come with puberty and adolescence. “Fat is safe” as a response to trauma.

[13:29] “This is my body and we’re not friends.” Weight loss felt unsafe when it did occur, such as experiencing unwanted attention from a male coworker. Living in your head instead of living in your body - that sense of disconnect and dissociation from your physical self.

[22:40] The impact of trauma on our relationships with our selves and our bodies. Dissociating as a form of self protection.

[27:46] Discovering John Gabriel and the Gabriel Method, eventually leading her to connect with Lisa. Coming home fired up and ready to make the changes and the risk of immediate burnout from making too many changes at once.

[38:22] Joining group coaching, finding connection and support through shared trauma in food. The nerves and anxiety of wanting to share but holding back, concerned about how your authentic self and truth might be received by others. Moving into a space where she could allow herself to dress her body in bright colors and styles she wouldn’t have worn before.

[48:12] Embodiment and connection with others in our journey toward safety. Accepting your current body the way it is. The exhaustion of experiencing emotions and allowing yourself to seek refuge in friendship.

[57:51] Validating your own frustration about a lot of the unhelpful advice about dieting and losing weight from people who don’t understand that it’s not about food. Understanding that it’s about emotional progress, not about the number on the scale or the measurements of your body.

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