Your Favorite You

You were probably the best student in your class. You pride yourself on being on time, top of your game, best in marks, most accomplished, get-it-all-done-come-hell-or-high-water grit. I call it Valedictorian Energy and I've got to tell you it's probably the energy holding you back from the life you want.

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As women we have been programmed to be ones who makes life better for others, and the perpetual people-pleaser that we think we have to take ownership of.  It's not about me over you, or vice versa. It's about reciprocity. Relationship. And it starts with recognizing what you want and trusting yourself to give it a try. It's not easy or comfortable to believe that we can let go of the need for approval, validation, and acceptance. It's time to say YES to yourself and learn how to become the Ex Good Girl with the Stop People Pleasing Coach herself, the amazing Sara Fisk.

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This Valentine's Day episode I am joined by a very special guest, my second most-favorite person in the world: my husband Jon. In this no-holds barred conversation, we're talking about some of the challenges and personal struggles we've faced in our marriage, as well some of the things we've learned to help turn things around so that we can really be Our Favorite Us. It's open, it's honest. And it all started when I first began coaching. The ripple effect coaching has had on my husband and family has been awesome to witness.

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We believe the story pretty universally that quitters are losers. However, it is also true that it's sometimes in our best interest to quit.  There are also times in our life when we definitely will not benefit by quitting, so how do we know when it's the right decision to quit and when it's the right decision to keep going?

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In this episode, I address the idea that letting something be easy is somehow inherently bad, and that working yourself to the bone for something, having it be hard is somehow more commendable. Some of my clients actually look for ways to make things harder on themselves so that they can feel better about having the life that they have.  It is not lazy to rest and take care of yourself. It is not lazy to take unnecessary bullshit off your never-ending to-do list. 

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A lot of us live our lives from accomplishment to accomplishment, going from one achievement to the next with little thought. And I'm here to say it sucks. It sucks because we presume so much of our value and worth from the doing, and miss the whole point of being, living, celebrating, and discovering. In this episode of the Your Favorite You Podcast, I share six things wrong with the idea of accomplishments, and what should really be the priority.

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It turns out that the "acceptance cycle" leads to serenity peace and wisdom, and that it is not just a one and done experience. This cycle is a continuum, and the universe keeps providing us with opportunities to grow and to heal and to get it right. The more we accept ourself for who we are, the easier it becomes to accept others for who they are. 

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This episode is about what I would tell you to do differently if I was still your pediatrician today. Some of these things will be vastly different from what I told you in my medical practice, and have likely not done any irreparable harm, but I do want you to know that my stance has changed as I have learned from other coaches, parenting experts and from psychologists.

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We have a very special guest again this week, one of my OG clients. Her name is Kim Orr. I have had the pleasure of knowing Kim for many, many years, and by the end of this podcast, you're going to love her as much as I do. Kim is a wife, mom, nurse, business owner and Yogi on a journey to love herself exactly the way she is, and in this episode she shares the impact coaching with me has had in her life, and how it helped her to figure out that she had all the answers already.

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Most of us who've mastered a craft, career or a hobby, know that there's a phase of being a beginner that feels so uncomfortable and stressful, and it takes efforting just to get good at it. Most of us think of learning a new skill as a linear process, and in this episode we explore the concept of the "Learning U," developed by Dr. Kemia Sarraf, who teaches trauma-responsive coaching.

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