Choosing to Stay

#120 Moving Toward Secure Attachment After Betrayal


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In this episode of Choosing to Stay, certified relational and recovery coaches Halle Roddick and Stephanie Hamby continue their multi-part series on attachment styles, focusing on secure attachment — what it looks like, how it develops, and why it’s a vital goal after infidelity and betrayal.

They explore:

  • What attachment theory is and the four main styles (secure, anxious, avoidant, disorganized)

  • How secure attachment shows up in healthy romantic relationships

  • Why betrayal ruptures both real and perceived secure attachments

  • The importance of building self-secure attachment before working on relational repair

  • Practical ways to cultivate internal safety, self-worth, and groundedness

  • The role of individual healing work for both the betrayed partner and the one seeking recovery

  • How rupture and repair cycles strengthen trust in secure relationships

Resources Mentioned:

  • You Are the One You’ve Been Waiting For – Richard Schwartz (Book Link)

  • No Bad Parts – Richard Schwartz (Book Link)

  • Altogether You – Jenna Riemersma (Book Link)

  • Help.Her.Heal – Carol J. Sheets (Book Link)

  • Internal Family Systems (IFS) Institute (Website)

Connect with Us: Follow the podcast for candid discussions on healing, growth, and the journey of choosing to stay after betrayal.

Your Hosts:

Hali RoderickCertified Relational Recovery CoachTICC, ACC, APSATS CPC, ERCEM-C, Brainspotting Practitioner

Read Hali’s Bio

Stephanie HambyCertified Relational Recovery CoachMCLC, ACC, APSATS CPC, ERCEM-CRead Stephanie’s Bio

We look forward to journeying with you!


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