Playing With Fire

153 Limerence vs. New Relationship Energy


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Have you ever had really strong feelings for someone— so strong that they took over your brain (and maybe even your life)? That kind of obsession can be super exciting, but it can also have big consequences.

Limerence and New Relationship Energy are two kinds of intense romantic fixation that have some key differences, and we’re diving deep into both of them.

We’ve been there—and that’s why we want to help you navigate these (exciting, scary, complicated… the list goes on!!) states of being.

In this episode, we’re covering:

— Symptoms and characteristics of limerence, including intrusive thoughts and ambiguity

— How NRE can disrupt or challenge existing relationships in the context of non-monogamy

— Our own personal experiences with limerence and NRE, and the challenges it brought to our relationships

— The difference between limerence and NRE, and why making that distinction can help you better understand your feelings

— The psychological effects of limerence, and why it involves so much asymmetry

— The role of projections in and their impact on new, limerent, and existing relationships

— Strategies for navigating NRE and limerence, including communication, boundaries, and self-compassion

Resources mentioned in this episode:

— The book The Limerent Mind by Lucy Bain

— The book Living With Limerence by Dr. L

Love and Limerence: The Experience of Being in Love by Dorothy Tennov

Dr. Sophia Graham on signs that new relationship energy may be problematic

Are you ready to open your relationship happily? Find out at⁠⁠ ⁠www.JoliQuiz.com⁠

Get the answers you want to create the open relationship of your dreams! Sign up for an Ask Me Anything here

Read the transcript of this episode here

Music: Dance of Felt by ⁠Blue Dot Sessions

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Playing With FireBy Joli Hamilton

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