Self-care is something we all need to be better at doing. Self-love and support are so important, especially the older we get. I’m joined by my friend and fellow coach, Dr. Kristi Angevine, to talk about self-care through real conversations. We cover the importance of being there for your friends, how to support your friends, making friends as adults, and why boundaries are so vital.

 

Key Takeaway

If someone asks you for help or cries in front of you, you are witnessing someone’s emotional processing.

 

About Dr. Kirsti Angevine

Kristi Angevine, MD, FACOG, is a board-certified Ob/Gyn and master-certified life coach. She specializes in helping high achievers change unhelpful habits into intentional ones. 

Whether it’s perfectionism, overthinking, people pleasing, excess scrolling, overeating, mindless shopping, or simply feeling chronically preoccupied with a running mental to-do list, she helps them unpack the root causes of their habits. She has a natural warmth that helps all of her clients feel at ease and have fun while they work on their mindset. 

In addition to master coach certification through The Life Coach School, she is also Internal Family Systems-informed and an Advanced Certified Deep Dive Coach. Her certification in Advanced Feminist Coaching is underway.

 

Self-Care Through Real Conversation

In this episode, I’m joined by my friend and personal sounding board, Dr. Kristi Angevine. We’ve been friends for years and have always trusted each other to provide the perspective we need when we have a problem.

This episode is all about self-care through real conversations, and that’s just what Kristi does for me. We hold space for each other to process and regulate our emotions in a supportive and safe space. But this does bring up the conversation on when and where to offer coaching advice – if you are friendly with a coach, you both need to be explicit about entering into a coaching-type conversation.

 

Making Friends as an Adult

Your friends can help you see what you’re having difficulty seeing at the moment. They give you perspective. But even when seeking help from your friends, it’s important that you’re honest with yourself about what you need. 

We both recognize how difficult it is to make friends as an adult. The dynamics are totally different from when we’re kids, but adult friendships are so valuable. Having friends available to ask for help when you need it is one of life’s greatest gifts – and it’s something we all need to be more comfortable doing.

Finally, we talk about the importance of setting boundaries with your friends… but also being ready to have difficult conversations that come up when you do set boundaries or say “no.”

How do your friends support you through your difficult moments? What do your friends mean to you? Let me know in the comments on the episode page.

 

In This Episode 

• The importance of emotional regulation and care [3:30]
• The value of having a coach for a friend [4:45]
• Why you need to give and receive explicit permission to offer to coach [7:45]
• Why you have to be honest with yourself about what you need [12:30]
• How your friends help you see what you can’t see in the moment [16:00]
• Why it’s important to trust yourself [20:30]
• What it means to ask your friends for help [23:30]
• The reality of making friends as an adult [25:00]

 

Quotes

“If I feel that I’ve connected with somebody and I’ve shared something, and then maybe it goes right into coaching, it positions you differently.” [7:13]

“In terms of the habits perspective, I think that everything we do, we do it for a great reason. There’s some reason why it became a pattern. There’s some reason why we repeat it. And the way to get out of it is to understand what the core assumption about ourselves that’s out in the world and driving that pattern that we don’t yet know.” [18:35]

“When we can hold space for ourselves and for our clients to work through the process of having support and validation to eventually find what they actually know to be true, it’s so powerful.” [21:14]

 

Resources

Listen to the Habits on Purpose Podcast

Email Dr. Kristi Angevine [email protected] 

Find Dr. Kristi Angevine Online

Follow Dr. Kristi Angevine on Habits on Purpose Facebook Group | Better Habits Physician's Group by HOPP Facebook Group | Instagram

 

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*** Ali Novitsky MD, this podcast, and podcast write-up are NOT providing medical advice ***

 

Related Episodes 

Episode 164: Break The Rules

Episode 165: 30-Minutes-A-Day

Episode 166: Energetic Protection for Empaths