Playing With Fire

195 Help, I’ve Struck Gold: Handling NRE in Two Relationships


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New Relationship Energy (NRE) can make everything feel like a shiny object. We get it, we love that feeling too! If you’re practicing non-monogamy, you might actually find yourself feeling NRE in multiple places. We made this episode in response to a listener question—what do I do with all these feelings and expectations? How do I prepare for when this chemical cocktail starts to fade?

Even though it’s really exciting, this noisy emotional environment requires thoughtful navigation to maintain balance and authenticity. In this episode we’re helping you navigate everything from the big picture emotional questions to the practical, day-to-day questions like how to manage your schedule.

We’re breaking down:

— The neurochemical nature of NRE

— How NRE can lead us to project our desires onto new partners rather than seeing them clearly

— The difference between NRE (new relationship energy) and limerence, and why understanding this distinction matters

— Why NRE often causes us to mute our own boundaries and bottom-line requirements

— The challenge of maintaining authenticity when we're caught up in the newness of relationships

— How to recognize when you're abandoning yourself, your established partners, or your friendships during intense NRE periods

— The importance of explicit conversations about expectations rather than just "going with the flow"

— Strategies for pacing yourself and managing your energy when experiencing multiple NREs

— The transition from NRE to ERE (established relationship energy) and how to nurture deeper connections

— Why comparing your relationships is less valuable than examining how you show up differently in each one

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Episode 153: Limerence vs. New Relationship Energy

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Music: Dance of Felt by ⁠Blue Dot Sessions

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Playing With FireBy Joli Hamilton

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