Relationships Made Easy

339. Why You Keep Proving Yourself Right (Even When You're Miserable): The Psychology of Confirmation Bias and Defense Mechanisms


Listen Later

You break up with someone and suddenly, every memory is framed as proof that they never really cared. You get into an argument with your mom, and you leave convinced, once again, that she just doesn’t get you. You walk into a work meeting with the story that your boss doesn’t respect you, and now every glance or tone of voice becomes more “evidence.” Sound familiar? That’s confirmation bias, and it’s working hand-in-hand with a set of mental strategies called defense mechanisms. Together, they keep you feeling justified and self-protected. But they also keep you stuck and locked inside the same limiting beliefs about yourself and everyone around you. Today I’ll explain what confirmation bias really is, how your defense mechanisms support it, and my top five research-backed steps to interrupt your confirmation bias so you can create connected, joyful relationships.

____________________________

Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/why-you-keep-proving-yourself-right-even-when-youre-miserable-the-psychology-of-confirmation-bias-and-defense-mechanisms

 

Take the Quiz! What’s Your Go-To Defense Mechanism: https://abbymedcalf.com/defense-mechanism-quiz

 

Learn how to create and hold healthy, loving boundaries with my book Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Ease and Joy https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries or The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook

 

Want to feel happier and more connected in your relationship? Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book

____________________________

 

Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to  https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast and https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.

 

For more quick tips, subscribe to my YouTube channel: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube

 

Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/shop

 

Say hello on social:

Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphd

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthriving

LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthriving

YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

Relationships Made EasyBy Dr. Abby Medcalf

  • 4.8
  • 4.8
  • 4.8
  • 4.8
  • 4.8

4.8

448 ratings


More shows like Relationships Made Easy

View all
The School of Greatness by Lewis Howes

The School of Greatness

21,180 Listeners

Relationship Advice by Thrive Therapy - Colter Bloxom, Lauren Mokarry, and Cayla Bozovich

Relationship Advice

1,674 Listeners

Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby by Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

805 Listeners

The Michelle Chalfant Show — Life from the Adult Chair by Michelle Chalfant

The Michelle Chalfant Show — Life from the Adult Chair

1,554 Listeners

What Healthy Couples Know That You Don't by Rhoda Sommer on Relationships

What Healthy Couples Know That You Don't

279 Listeners

Life Coaching with Christine Hassler by Christine Hassler

Life Coaching with Christine Hassler

1,628 Listeners

Relationship Revival Podcast: Expert Advice on Relationships, Marriage, Dating by Nicola Beer

Relationship Revival Podcast: Expert Advice on Relationships, Marriage, Dating

384 Listeners

Relationship Renovation | Couples | Love | Advice | Intimacy | Communication | Marriage by EJ and Tarah Kerwin

Relationship Renovation | Couples | Love | Advice | Intimacy | Communication | Marriage

166 Listeners

LET’S TALK ATTACHMENTS by Jessica Da Silva, LMFT

LET’S TALK ATTACHMENTS

274 Listeners

The Thais Gibson Podcast by Thais Gibson

The Thais Gibson Podcast

291 Listeners

Let’s Get Vulnerable: Relationship and Dating Advice by Dr. Morgan Anderson

Let’s Get Vulnerable: Relationship and Dating Advice

1,135 Listeners

Unf*ck Your Relationships by Michelle Panning

Unf*ck Your Relationships

212 Listeners

On Attachment by Stephanie Rigg

On Attachment

999 Listeners

Jillian on Love by Jillian Turecki | QCODE

Jillian on Love

1,374 Listeners

The Sabrina Zohar Show by The Sabrina Zohar Show

The Sabrina Zohar Show

4,850 Listeners