March 16, 2022

41. What Men Want and Healthy Masculinity with Connor Beaton

54 minutes

Today we are joined by the incredible Connor Beaton. Connor is the founder of ManTalks, an international organization focused on men’s health, wellness, success, and fulfillment. In this episode, we talk about what men want, healthy masculinity, and ask some relationship questions. This episode is packed full of tips and information you don’t want to miss.

Connor’s Why [5:00]

“I wanted to support other men and create an environment where we could not have to hide certain aspects of ourselves but feel manly and masculine and develop more robust, mature versions of masculinity.”

“After my rock bottom, I had somebody in my life who believed in me more than I believed in myself.”

Vulnerability [12:00]

“The one rule of men: You don’t talk about what it’s like to be a man, specifically a man who is suffering or struggling.”

“When a man hasn’t experienced contained powerlessness, he will always abuse power.”

“Men need to have a right relationship with power.”

“They think about everything around them, but they don’t actually experience it.”

“Shame loves to hide.”

“It’s important to teach boys that it’s okay and safe to be vulnerable.”

“To be courageous is to be vulnerable. To be vulnerable is to be courageous.”

“I don’t compete with the people in my inner circle, I celebrate with them and share my biggest challenges.”

Women Embracing the Masculine[24:00]

“The narrative that ‘I don’t need you’ pushes men away. It takes away from his capacity to contribute.”

“Look at where the narrative came from- who told you that you don’t men? Was it a social narrative, coming from a family member?”

“Start communicating with a man how you want him to contribute.”

“When a woman is vulnerable with a man, that is when you really meet the man. Is he able to stay grounded and respond in a vulnerable way?”

Courage in Your Relationship [30:00]

“Take the step and say, ‘I’m going to let the more feminine oriented parts of me come forward and be present. I am going to communicate those parts even though it feel vulnerable and scary.’”

“If we don’t feel safe, we try and perfect our circumstances, which can come off as controlling in a relationship.”

“Where we seek to have power, we are out of love. Leadership in a relationship is about helping to see where a relationship is going.”

“Do you have agreements about how you’re going to operate in arguments?”

Core Feminine Needs [39:00]

“A core feminine need that is often not met by the masculine is being understood.”

“When a woman says she’s hurt, the natural hard wired response is to protect. We move into a place where we want to solve your problem but we don’t know how because we don’t understand what you’re experiencing.”

“Courage doesn’t happen in your mind, it happens in your heart and being in that experience with your partner.”

Viewing The Unconscious Mind [45:00]

“Most men live in their head and are detached

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