Coaching for Leaders

516: How to Find Helpful Advisors, with Ethan Kross


Listen Later

Ethan Kross: Chatter

Ethan Kross is one of the world’s leading experts on controlling the conscious mind. As an award-winning professor in the University of Michigan’s top-ranked Psychology Department and its Ross School of Business, he studies how the conversations people have with themselves impact their health, performance, decisions, and relationships.

His research has been published in Science, The New England Journal of Medicine, and The Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. He’s been featured by Good Morning America, NPR’s Morning Edition, The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, Harvard Business Review, and many other publications. He’s the author of Chatter: The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It*.

In this conversation, Ethan and I highlight how introspection can sometimes do more harm than good. Ethan invites us to form a board of advisors that support us with both our emotional and cognitive needs. Plus, he shares the science behind how we can do this effectively for others.

Key Points
  • Simply sharing our emotions with others doesn’t help us to recover in any meaningful way.
  • When seeking out advisors, we should find those who support both our emotional needs as well as our cognitive ones. You want a blend of both Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock. 🖖
  • Reflect on past conversations with advisors and determine if that previously helped you move forward with a challenging situation. That’s a key indicator to determine if they are people you want to keep engaging.
  • Seek out different advisors for different things.
  • A key distinction in supporting others is whether they have specifically sought out of advice or not. If not, being helpful people through invisible means is often useful.
  • Resources Mentioned
    • Chatter: The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It* by Ethan Kross
    • Interview Notes

      Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).

      Related Episodes
      • How to Know What You Don’t Know, with Art Markman (episode 437)
      • The Way to Be More Coach-Like, with Michael Bungay Stanier (episode 458)
      • Leadership Lies We Tell Ourselves, with Emily Leathers (episode 479)
      • Making the Most of Mentoring (free membership required)
      • Discover More

        Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

        ...more
        View all episodesView all episodes
        Download on the App Store

        Coaching for LeadersBy Dave Stachowiak

        • 4.8
        • 4.8
        • 4.8
        • 4.8
        • 4.8

        4.8

        1,393 ratings


        More shows like Coaching for Leaders

        View all
        The Look & Sound of Leadership by Essential Communications - Tom Henschel

        The Look & Sound of Leadership

        1,163 Listeners

        The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk by Ryan Hawk

        The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk

        1,346 Listeners

        Teaching in Higher Ed by Bonni Stachowiak

        Teaching in Higher Ed

        374 Listeners

        HBR IdeaCast by Harvard Business Review

        HBR IdeaCast

        176 Listeners

        Negotiate Anything by Kwame Christian Esq., M.A.

        Negotiate Anything

        728 Listeners

        How to Be Awesome at Your Job by How to be Awesome at Your Job

        How to Be Awesome at Your Job

        1,037 Listeners

        Worklife with Adam Grant by TED

        Worklife with Adam Grant

        9,136 Listeners

        Speak Up: Develop Your Executive Presence & Leadership Communication Style by Laura Camacho

        Speak Up: Develop Your Executive Presence & Leadership Communication Style

        95 Listeners

        Maxwell Leadership Executive Podcast by John Maxwell

        Maxwell Leadership Executive Podcast

        380 Listeners

        Inside the Strategy Room by McKinsey & Company

        Inside the Strategy Room

        176 Listeners

        No Bullsh!t Leadership by Martin G Moore

        No Bullsh!t Leadership

        127 Listeners

        The Anxious Achiever by Morra Aarons-Mele

        The Anxious Achiever

        572 Listeners

        Think Fast Talk Smart: Communication Techniques by Matt Abrahams, Think Fast Talk Smart

        Think Fast Talk Smart: Communication Techniques

        834 Listeners

        A Bit of Optimism by Simon Sinek

        A Bit of Optimism

        2,226 Listeners

        Coaching Real Leaders by Harvard Business Review / Muriel Wilkins

        Coaching Real Leaders

        668 Listeners

        HBR On Leadership by Harvard Business Review

        HBR On Leadership

        174 Listeners