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58: Anxious Attachment Q+A: How to Stop Overthinking and Ruining a Good Relationship - 4 Steps
Attachment Style QUIZ – Take the 3-min quiz to be 100% sure you're Anxiously Attached: 3 MIN QUIZ
Anxious ArcheTYPE QUIZ – Discover which of the 4 archetypes you are and how you manage your stress and anxiety
✅ Anxious to Secure Checklist – Signs you're becoming securely attached
Are you with someone GOOD…but you can’t stop overthinking, spiraling, or self-sabotaging?
You’re not broken. You’re just operating from anxious attachment... and it’s exhausting.
In this video, I’ll walk you through 4 simple but powerful steps to stop overthinking, feel calmer in love, and actually enjoy a GOOD relationship (without pushing them away 💛)
🖤 How to break the reassurance loop
🖤 What’s really behind your fears
🖤 The shift from “Is it safe?” ➞ “I can handle it”
🖤 Journal prompts + mindset hacks that work
🎙 Real talk. No fluff. No shame…
Let's break the anxious patterns that keep you stuck…and build safety from the inside out.
00:00 Today's Q+A: Spiraling when I don't hear back even though she reassures me.
01:35 Understanding what's happening with your Body when triggered
02:52 Why this “waiting spiral” hits so hard...
05:52 Why the Trigger is not about the PRESENT moment, about your partner
08:26 MICRO-EXAMPLES of past roots
10:56 Coaching Questions (to connect to YOUR story)
12:43 What To Do Going Forward
15:11 Why logic alone isn’t enough...
16:13 The 4R METHOD Your New Action Plan
17:14 ✶ 01 RELEASE the emotion
22:19 Question you can ask yourself
23:05 ✶ 02 REWIRE your beliefs
25:00 ✶ 03 RECONNECT with yourself
29:31 ✶ 04 REFLECT on your shadow
31:11 MINI ACTION PLAN To create emotional safety
35:21 How to Work with me or Free Resources
COURSES ON OFFER (beta round)
🖤 How to Stop OVERTHINKING Your Relationship in 4 Steps (With Your Avoidant Partner)
https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/overthinkingcourse
OFFERS:
🖤📱 ON SALE: "Stop Obsessing Over Texts in 21 Days or Less"
https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textanxiety
🖤 Attachment LIBRARY (Free resources, Courses, 1:1 Support)
https://linktr.ee/the.anxious.to.secure.coach
DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor. This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions. This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.
Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.
View all episodes
By Jula - The Anxious To Secure Coach
3.7
33 ratings
Attachment Style QUIZ – Take the 3-min quiz to be 100% sure you're Anxiously Attached: 3 MIN QUIZ
Anxious ArcheTYPE QUIZ – Discover which of the 4 archetypes you are and how you manage your stress and anxiety
✅ Anxious to Secure Checklist – Signs you're becoming securely attached
Are you with someone GOOD…but you can’t stop overthinking, spiraling, or self-sabotaging?
You’re not broken. You’re just operating from anxious attachment... and it’s exhausting.
In this video, I’ll walk you through 4 simple but powerful steps to stop overthinking, feel calmer in love, and actually enjoy a GOOD relationship (without pushing them away 💛)
🖤 How to break the reassurance loop
🖤 What’s really behind your fears
🖤 The shift from “Is it safe?” ➞ “I can handle it”
🖤 Journal prompts + mindset hacks that work
🎙 Real talk. No fluff. No shame…
Let's break the anxious patterns that keep you stuck…and build safety from the inside out.
00:00 Today's Q+A: Spiraling when I don't hear back even though she reassures me.
01:35 Understanding what's happening with your Body when triggered
02:52 Why this “waiting spiral” hits so hard...
05:52 Why the Trigger is not about the PRESENT moment, about your partner
08:26 MICRO-EXAMPLES of past roots
10:56 Coaching Questions (to connect to YOUR story)
12:43 What To Do Going Forward
15:11 Why logic alone isn’t enough...
16:13 The 4R METHOD Your New Action Plan
17:14 ✶ 01 RELEASE the emotion
22:19 Question you can ask yourself
23:05 ✶ 02 REWIRE your beliefs
25:00 ✶ 03 RECONNECT with yourself
29:31 ✶ 04 REFLECT on your shadow
31:11 MINI ACTION PLAN To create emotional safety
35:21 How to Work with me or Free Resources
COURSES ON OFFER (beta round)
🖤 How to Stop OVERTHINKING Your Relationship in 4 Steps (With Your Avoidant Partner)
https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/overthinkingcourse
OFFERS:
🖤📱 ON SALE: "Stop Obsessing Over Texts in 21 Days or Less"
https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textanxiety
🖤 Attachment LIBRARY (Free resources, Courses, 1:1 Support)
https://linktr.ee/the.anxious.to.secure.coach
DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor. This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions. This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.
Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.
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