The Clark Kegley Podcast

7 Ways to Deal With Toxic People In Your Life


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Clark
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Let’s talk about how to deal with toxic people in your life. When you hear “toxic people” I’m willing to bet at least ONE person popped into your mind. Think about them in this video. Dive into seven quick steps on how to recognize when someone's holding you back and if they are, how to cut them out of your awesome life. Before get fully into this, acknowledge there are SOME people you CAN’T get rid of. No excuse not to watch the video, these tips still work. Use them as much as possible! So if you’re with me, hit that like button and let’s dive into it.

★★★ BEST 7 TIPS ★★★

1. You Are Who You Hang Around
Study: found if your best friend became obese you are 57% more likely to be obese as well. Study: found couples start to look alike physically over time! Because they mimic each other's facial expressions so much, changes their own! (also with pets and people). You’ve probably heard “You are the Avg of top 5 people you spend the most time with” of “Birds of feather flock together”. Ask, do I want to be like who I’m hanging around? My body to look like them? My mindset? My style?

2. Sunk Costs
I define toxic as anyone who is sucking more energy from you than they provide. Energy vampire. I believe this: “There are some people you grow up with and others you grow out of”. Whatever it is, if you’re going to change you’ll need to get over “sunk costs”. Devil, you know better than the devil you don't. When to make that tough call — don’t let sunk costs influence your thinking.

3. Why People Suck
Two ways to have the tallest building in town: way one is to build it. Takes a lot of time/energy/effort. Way two is to tear everyone else’s down. Knew someone who had a best friend of 8 years who FORCE another one to eat/drink excessively — had to cut out. When the friend didn’t want to hang around them she got defensive and said: “You’ve changed” or “think you’re too good for us?” etc. Good sign bad person: when they try to convince you to enable their bad habits. Feels better to them if you get on their level.

4. Tell Them.
Give them a chance! I don’t recommend to just cut people out of the blue. Give them a chance to change. Have a conversation with complete honesty about their behavior. Know that everyone has own struggles. We ALL go through rough patches. My biggest beef with personal development is that it can be SELFISH! Remember that relationships are a place you go to give, not a place you go to get (end rant).
EX: That same friend who drinks too much and says awful things. Didn’t accept that behavior, told them. Nonjudgmental way. Nonaccusatory. “Hey, notice you get a little rowdy drinking. if anythings up ever need to talk about things, I’m here”. Worked on for years with that person. Still nothing. Give them multiple chances to fix things.

5. Distance
TRUST YOUR GUT! Dr. Phil put a person on a “watch list” radar “There are some people you grow up with. Others you grow out of.” Ease out of things.

6. Model
Like attracts like. You attract what you are. Ever see a 10 with a 4? 10s attract 10s! Work harder on improving yourself than anything else you do and you’ll be successful. You’ll attract people to you. Refuse to settle for anything less than you deserve.

7. Your Online Top 5
I’m apart of a group that has over 7k+ members on Facebook - all over the world, post photos of newborn babies, raise money for health crisis — what would you guess the groups about? MENS HAIR PRODUCTS. Point being whatever you’re into there are people out there. Pursue your interests and you’ll find people.

8. 80/20 Analysis
Write a list of everyone you spend time with. Work, family, relationship, friends. What 20% of people gave me 80% of my happiness? Focus on spending 80% of your time with that 20% and you’ll be happier.

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SOCIAL:

Blog ► http://www.clarkkegley.com
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The Clark Kegley PodcastBy Clark Kegley

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