Coaching for Leaders

767: Being Nice May Not Be Kind, with Graham Allcott


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Graham Allcott: KIND

Graham Allcott is an author, speaker, entrepreneur, and the founder of Think Productive, a leading provider of training and consultancy. He is the author of multiple books, including the bestseller How to Be a Productivity Ninja and his latest book, KIND: The Quiet Power of Kindness at Work (Amazon, Bookshop)*.

“Nice” means telling people what they want to hear. “Kind” means telling them what they need to hear. The best leaders are kind. In this conversation, Graham and I explore how we can do a better job of following through.

Key Points
  • “Nice” means telling people what they want to hear, whereas “kind” means telling them what they need to hear.
  • Kindness is both concern for others and concern for self. Just like with salted caramel, it’s best with the right balance.
  • Leaders often do better articulating vision and values than they do with getting clear on expectations of value each person should provide.
  • Being clear is an act of kindness in itself because it drives psychological safety.
  • Use a personal mantra as a concise and powerful way to consistently remind people about what’s most important.
  • Invite others to “give the last 20%” in feedback to uncover areas where clarity would help.
  • Resources Mentioned
    • KIND: The Quiet Power of Kindness at Work by Graham Allcott (Amazon, Bookshop)*
    • Rev Up for the Week (Graham’s newsletter)
    • Interview Notes

      Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required).

      Related Episodes
      • Five Steps to Hold People Accountable, with Jonathan Raymond (episode 306)
      • How to Build Psychological Safety, with Amy Edmondson (episode 404)
      • How to Give Feedback, with Russ Laraway (episode 583)
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