ADHD AF

Undiagnosed ADHDers can’t cope. The NHS can’t cope. And we can’t cope with constantly hearing from listeners just how broken the ADHD (in particular the adult ADHD) diagnostic system is! 

We haven’t started this podcast to get internet points, we’ve done it to help others like us. 
We get multiple messages daily telling us our ramblings are helping people feel validated and less alone in their suffering, which is incredible! BUT, what we really want is to help (even in a tiny way) to influence systemic change, so that ADHDers that need/want to access medical diagnosis/treatment don’t have to suffer like they are!

This very emotional episode, in which we share just a handful of the countless experiences we get sent, our @adhdasfemales Instagram story poll results, followers suggestions for how to change the broken system, and our own, is fuelled by rage at the injustice of how many undiagnosed adult ADHDers are being treated by medical professionals. 

It’s not all ranting and feet stomping though, we promise! This isn’t about pointing the finger, it’s about potential problem solving.. and there is some joy in it too. 

ADHDers need help, the NHS needs help, CHANGE IS URGENTLY NEEDED. 
We need to come together and understand this crisis from both sides and start a new system to save lives! 

*Trigger Warning* 
Alongside swearing, this episode contains topics such as medical negligence, false accusations of abuse, body shaming, ADHD denying, severe mental health struggle and suicide. 

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We are so grateful to Helen Anderson for joining us on the late ADHD diagnosis rollercoaster, and so excited to share this insightful and hilarious interview with an absolute powerhouse!

Helen humbly introduces herself as an ‘Internet Person’ (ADHDers tend to self deprecate)
Helen is in fact an internet sensation!

She has an ENORMOUS online following of her YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/helenmelonlady which she began vlogging on a decade ago. 
Her straight- talking, no BS attitude, body positivity, hilarious reels and rock n roll style have gained her an equally gargantuan following on Instagram: @helenanderz 
Helen has also created an online shop: @sweetsweethoneydew for ‘Rock n Rollin’ self lovers and loathers’. 
To top it all off, she is the lead singer of the band: @sunny.bones - their new EP, ‘This Hell Called Home’ is out now! 

It’s hard to imagine that a woman this driven could suffer with RSD,  task paralysis, low self esteem and the other struggles that hold so many ADHDers back… but don’t believe everything you see, or rather perceive on social media…
Helen Anderson is ADHD AF! 

Very recently diagnosed at the age of 31.
Massive thank you to the absolute legend that is Helen for sharing her struggles and experiences, that so many will relate to (us included!) and for the pearls which we will treasure. 
Enjoy! 

*Trigger warning* as ever this episode contains strong language. 
We discuss some sensitive topics such as depression, anxiety, unsympathetic strangers (ie internet trolls) family and romantic relationship struggles, and low self esteem.
We also voice some potentially controversial opinions. Please note, that we are not experts or medical professionals, just three women who battled through life with undiagnosed brain disorders,  desperately hoping to influence change to save others from suffering for as long as we have. 

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We are reunited in Aberdeen, after Laura's couple of weeks on the road selling her handmade wears at The Secret Garden Party.  Not only does that explain the length of this episode (us neurodivergent neighbours had a lot of catching up to do!) but it also led us to the topic of this Episode. 

With Dawn studying 3D Design at University and Laura into her 12th year as a creative entrepreneur with @hathor.hedonism, evidently we are both very much creatives. 
However, as we always say - ADHD is not a one size fits all disorder! Though ADHDers share similar struggles and traits; the disability effects us all in different ways. 

We decided to challenge this ADHD creative entrepreneur stereotype with a poll for our instagram followers: @adhdasfemales, and it's fair to say we were very surprised by the results. Thanks to all who participated. 

We begin this Episode by answering the 'ask us anything' questions from our followers, before diving into the poll and giving our own personal reflections on a topic that definitely holds some weight; but we argue, this could potentially be due in part to RSD as much as anything else. 

We share some 'information' from online articles on the topic, one of which makes a claim so untrue, irresponsible and insulting that Laura has a meltdown and shares some choice words for the 'journalist' at multiple points. sorry, not sorry! 
We also debunk the myth that ADHD meds destroy creativity. 

We conclude with our 'differences', 'the most ADHD thing we have done this week' and some VERY EXCITING news from Dawn!!!!!!!

TRIGGER WARNING: The rage evoked by said article makes this episode even more sweary than usual, so be warned.  
We cover some sensitive topics including: Severe mental health issues, depression, anxiety, self loathing, relationship struggles, and people disbelieving and diminishing our invisible disability

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We are so excited about this Episode. It’s a bit longer than usual; as Louise shared so many pearls, we didn’t want to cut any out! (Hence why there’s minimal into/outro from us) 

As many of you will be aware, Louise Williams is an absolute LEGEND! 
She has an incredible blog - Pink Pear Bear - and ADHD support groups of the same name. 
Louise has been making much needed noise about mental health for seven years online. 
She has helped so many ADHDers and continues to do so with her ENORMOUS online community, and now she has started a gym with a difference - Solace, providing solace for the soul. Unlike standard gyms that many find intimidating; the ethos is that all are welcome of all abilities, to join a safe community that they can feel comfortable in. 

Louise shares her journey battling depression and anxiety, with medication for what turned out to be comorbidities (sounds familiar!) Her mental health deteriorated further after having her children until eventually getting diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 37.

We are sure you will love this inspirational interview with a truly lovely lady! 

Trigger warning: sensitive topics covered such as; mental health struggles, alcoholism, medication problems, imposter syndrome, potentially controversial opinions, and some swearing

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Apologies in advance that the sound isn’t the usual standard. We had to record this on the road - literally!

In every Episode of ADHDAF we invite you to join us on our late ADHD diagnosis journey, but in this particular instalment you are joining us on an actual journey too(!) from north east Scotland down to Blackpool in a car full to the rafters of festival accessories, with a surprise guest appearance from Laura’s Husband Big. 

Reason being, we have to hold our hands up at this point and admit we’ve taken on WAY too much, meaning it has become a struggle for us both to keep all of the plates spinning! 

ADHDers are prone to overcommitting.  A lifetime of not meeting expectations, and ‘just try harders’ can lead us to become hardcore people pleasers! Overcompensation and executive dysfunction can cause us to take on too many tasks.  Time blindness, a lack of boundaries/self- worth/care and rejection sensitive dysphoria can all bring an inability to perceive our own limits. Not to mention that the lazy’, ‘useless’ etc labels many of us have picked up along the way can make us feel like we have a hell of a lot to prove! 

We hope you enjoy this very random check-in, in which we reflect on everything from our incredible interview with Clementine Ford, storming the UK & Australian podcast charts, the seriousness of the worldwide health crisis of ADHD, wearing cycling shorts to work, forgetting to sleep, wash and get any fresh air for over a week… and loads more. That’s not even half of it…as ever, we have a LOT to say! 

Always remember this truly inspirational quote:  ‘Keep smashing everything!’ -  Dawn-Marie Farmer 
LOLS! 

TRIGGER WARNING: Contains strong language and mentions of severe mental health crisis, suicide, death, family bereavement, work and financial struggles, trauma and relationship struggles

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We still can’t believe this happened! 
Award winning Australian Author, feminist icon and absolute legend Clementine Ford shares her ADHD story with us in this very special episode. 

Clementine’s bestselling book ‘Fight Like a Girl’ is the essential feminists manifesto.  Her other incredible writing work includes: ‘Boys Will Be Boys’ and her latest book: ‘How We Love.’  Previously a columnist for Fairfax’s Daily Life; Clementine is also a regular contributor to The Age and The Sydney Morning Herald. 

Her own Podcast ‘Dear Clementine’ is packed with advice that you may not want, but you definitely need…so give that a listen too! 

Clementine was diagnosed with ADHD this year at the age of 40; and she very kindly hopped aboard the late ADHD diagnosis rollercoaster with us.  
In this episode she shares reflections of her childhood, relationships, work, motherhood and the future, through a new ADHD lens. 

There is so much to take away from this insightful ‘blether’, the magic eye analogy in particular is life changing! Thank you thank you thank you Clementine! 

*Trigger warning, as ever we are a tad sweary, we discuss mental health crisis, family bereavement, maternal struggles, relationship problems, alcohol, substance use and addiction. 

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Following on from our slightly controversial opinions voiced in our interview with Dr Alex Conner of The ADHD adults Podcast; this week we are deep diving into booze. NOT LITERALLY! 

We reveal our story poll results, which we were pretty surprised by, whilst giving our personal answers and reflections. 

After divulging our own experiences as undiagnosed ADHDers and alchohol we share some information from experts. 

We conclude with our weekly segment ‘the most ADHD thing we’ve done this week. 

We hope you enjoy this episode, if so we would love you to make a donation at buymeacoffee.com/adhdasfemales


TRIGGER WARNING - this episode is particularly sweary, sorry! We discuss some very sensitive topics including: underage drinking, alcohol abuse, alcoholism. alcoholic family member. 
*If you our struggling with alcohol, or are suffering as a result of someone in your life’s alcohol issues, please do reach out for the support you need either via your GP and/or the likes of  @drinkaware_trust or @nacoauk 

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This is a really special one!  In this episode, we interview the other half of the duo who inspired us to start this podcast with theirs - The ADHD Adults Podcast.

Dr Alex Conner:
- Reader in Biomedical Science Communication at the University of Birmingham Medical School 
- Co-founder of the charity ADHD Adult UK
- Co-founder of Focus, a free online magazine about Adult ADHD
- Co-host of the aforementioned podcast with Dr James Brown (ADHDAF Episode 5), which continues to be an enormous help to us both on our late ADHD diagnosis journeys
- executive ADHD coach.
- Such a lovely man we forgot we were interviewing and launched into a ranty and potentially controversial ‘chat’ 

Alex assured us that it’s ok to share an opinion, especially with the disclaimer that we are NOT IN ANY WAY EXPERTS! As ever, we are new to all of this and trying to find the answers to all of the questions that pop up whilst we ride the late ADHD diagnosis rollercoaster. 

We are SO GRATEFUL to Alex for this emotional ‘interview’ / chat! THANK YOU!

We hope you enjoy this episode as much as we do. 

*TRIGGER WARNING*
This is very sweary, and we mention mental health crisis, drug and alcohol abuse, controversial opinions about diagnosis and medication issues. 

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This Episode comes with multiple trigger warnings, and it was incredibly triggering for us to record. 

We explore the many ways in which undiagnosed ADHD has cost us in ‘romantic’ relationships throughout our lives. We distinguish this type of relationship, as we will cover other types of personal relationships  ADHD Tax has cost us in a future episode. The quotation marks are also there for irony! LOLS! 

We deep dive into how undiagnosed ADHD can destroy romantic relationships, backed up with some heavy stats. 

We reflect upon how unknowingly our ADHD has caused others distress, rather than victimising ourselves as we would’ve done prior to the awareness our ‘diagnosis’ brought. We acknowledge how vulnerable a place we were in unknowingly due to our symptoms. HOWEVER, that does NOT excuse the bad behaviour of other parties. 

Finally we credit Florence Given for her words of wisdom! If somebody treats you badly, DUMP HIM! 
Much like Florence’s book, ‘Women Don’t Owe You Pretty’, this is the podcast episode we wish we’d heard a couple of decades ago. 

We hope you ‘enjoy’ or at least take something away from this excruciating episode, and that we don’t sound too preachy! We are by no means experts(!!!) and on reflection, we are basically telling our younger selves a thing or two! 

*TRIGGER WARNING* 
We discuss some VERY distressing topics, including divorce, domestic abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse, gaslighting, breakups, severe mental health distress 

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We still can't believe that our second ADHDAF guest is the one and only Sophia Hilton!

The owner of the Not Another Brand has completely disrupted the industry in the last 6 years. Starting with the most talked about salon, Not Another Salon. She then went on to open 3 more companies, including an the biggest selling in-person academy in the UK, a social media consultancy company and retail. Recently, her Not Another Online learning Platform has over 4000 students across 52 countries worldwide and is now being translated into 5 languages.

Sophia has a whopping 13 business awards putting her in the hall of fame at the Creative Head awards meaning she can no longer enter! That goes alongside a futher 4 awards in hairdressing  and colour and at the British Hairdressing awards and Creative Head.

Sophia was diagnosed this year, aged 34.  Like us, Sophia is just a few months in to discovering her Neurodivergence.

 We begin this Episode backwards with 'the most ADHD thing we've done this week', as a disclaimer for the sound quality. WE ACCIDENTALLY DIDN'T RECORD THE EPISODE! (MORTIFYING!!!)

Thankfully @theshibuiproject was recording, or else we would have lost this incredible interview all together!

We are so grateful to Sophia for giving us her time (particularly so early on in our Podcasting journey) and for using her very influential voice for the cause.  THANK YOU SOPHIA!
Sophia's words are insightful, emotional and inspiring, thank God the other team pressed record! :)

This 'blether' is three ladies in their thirties riding the ADHD late diagnosis rollercoaster together, come and join the ride!

Sophia Hilton: @hiltonsophia
Not Another Salon: @notanothersalon
Not Another Academy: @notanotheracademy
https://www.notanothersalon.com/
Check out her incredible course for creatives: https://online.notanotheracademy.com/courses/leadership-for-a-new-life

*TRIGGER WARNING* 
We explore some sensitive topics which some listeners may find distressing including: Anxiety, Depression, Financial Struggles, Lockdown, ADHD Medication, Relationship and Motherhood Struggles

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