Every relationship deals with conflict, just in different ways. Some are avoidant, while others are confrontational. Some are constantly simmering, while others are explosive. Our guest today is therapist Trevor Hanson. Not only does he want to help us reframe how we see conflict--not an inhibitor to a successful marriage, but necessary to it—he wants to help you get better at what he calls “healthy conflict—” the kind where we can come together with different fears, needs, and messages, but still come away connected.

Because a partnership takes two people, with different backgrounds and different emotional responses, couples can often find themselves caught in a negative cycle. Trevor goes in to detail about what this can look like, and offers advice on where to start. In his words, "If you can change at least one half of the cycle, you've changed 50% of the problem."

Kwame Christian on conflict and people pleasing.

This episode is brought to you by Headspace, try it for free for 30 days when you go to headspace.com/progress

This episode is brought to you by LuvBug, get a free 7 day trial at LuvBuglearning.com

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices