Ask Kati Anything episode 89

Audience questions:

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TRAUMATIZED - https://geni.us/Bfak0j
ARE U OK? - http://bit.ly/2s0mULy

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ONLINE THERAPY  I do not currently offer online therapy.  BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online counselor, please visit: https://tryonlinetherapy.com/katimorton
I receive commissions on referrals to BetterHelp. I only recommend services I know and trust.

PATREON   https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/

Opinions That Don't Matter! (2nd podcast)
video https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs58xfxPpjVARRuwjH8us

Episode 88 audience questions:
1. If you are taught growing up that your feelings were not valid, how do you start to feel okay feeling feelings? Throughout my childhood and as I grew up, I was consistently told I was just being too sensitive or overreacting or whatever happened was not worth getting upset over...

2. I just started therapy to work through physical and sexual abuse and was diagnosed with PTSD. My therapist has pointed out (with compassion) that I’m very ambivalent. I didn’t think this was necessarily bad until I looked it up and saw that it can be a predictor of failed...

3. Can you talk about intellectualizing rather than processing trauma? My therapist says I seem to be able to talk about details of my trauma with a "clinical" viewpoint, as if I'm talking about someone else, with no difficulty at all. (I have a degree in social work).

4. Hope you’re doing well. Can you talk a little bit about building intrinsic motivation? I find it easy to fight my depressive symptoms in order to do things for others, like keeping spaces clean that my roommates use, or cooking for my family, but since moving out on my own, I can’t seem to...

5. What qualifies as “treatment resistant depression”? I’ve tried multiple medications, been in therapy for several years, and I’m still not feeling consistent improvement, no matter how hard I work at it. I’ve been depressed for half my life and all I want is to feel better- I just...

6. Are eating disorders ever misdiagnosed? If so, what is it most often misdiagnosed as? (COMMENT: Another question off of diagnosis of EDs, if a person is diagnosed with anorexia nervosa binge/purge subtype, then gains weight through treatment but continues to binge/purge, would they now have bulimia? Can you explain the difference exactly between AN binge /purge subtype and BN? // can you be diagnosed with something like "disordered eating"?

7. How do you go from knowing something to wholeheartedly believing in it? Like I know and can probably recite what my therapist says about how its okay to have needs, that I need to care for myself first, its okay to take up space etc but emotionally, I am not there. It's still so hard and it...

8. Could you talk more about the fawn-response? And especially how to get rid of it? Because I feel like I do that all the time, and occasions when I am actually authentic are really rare. And I hate that about me. I feel like I am lying to everyone around me, and I feel a lot of guilt and shame...

9. How do your client's/patients feel about you doing YouTube videos? Are there ever any issues that come up about it?  My therapist has a YouTube channel and it's creating quite a few issues for me. I try to talk about it but it does not change my reaction to it. My therapist shares a lot of personal information about himself...

Kati's books in stores now!
TRAUMATIZED - https://geni.us/Bfak0j
ARE U OK? - http://bit.ly/2s0mULy

Amazon Suggestions https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton

ONLINE THERAPY  I do not currently offer online therapy.  BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online counselor, please visit: https://tryonlinetherapy.com/katimorton
I receive commissions on referrals to BetterHelp. I only recommend services I know and trust.

PATREON   https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/

Opinions That Don't Matter! (2nd podcast)
video https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs58xfxPpjVARRuwjH8us

Ask Kati Anything! podcast episode 86

Audience Questions:
1. Why do I feel like I failed at my illness? I had anorexia for several years and then morphed into bulimia. But I don't really feel like being bulimic and more like a "failed anorexic".It really keeps me from wanting to get better and makes me so ashamed...

2. Is it possible for older teenagers (16-19yo) to be groomed? Also, is grooming always explicitly sexual, or can it be only vaguely sexual or even not sexual at all? Thanks for all you do...

3. What is religious trauma and how do you know if you have experienced it? I am a part of the LGBTQ community and I am going to church, but it also conflicts my sexuality. I have looked up some of the signs/symptoms, but I am unsure because I am second guessing myself...

4. Here, in The Netherlands, I am 30 years out of treatment because they didn't want to help me anymore. The reason why: because I was too complex and the risk of killing myself was too high...

5. I am wondering if you have any suggestions of what to tell a friend when they ask how they can help. I have a wonderful friend who has been very supportive in listening to me talk about my anxieties and other mental health concerns...

6. We hear a lot about transference, but I haven’t heard many people speak on Erotic Transference. What is a driving factor behind Erotic Transference? Have you ever had a client be open with you about theirs? & do therapists ever get Erotic Countertransference?

7. I want to stop living my life through the gaze of my trauma. After watching your videos and listening to the, 'The Place we find ourselves' podcast, I realized that I have experienced more trauma than I thought and...

8. Do you need a different type of therapy if you’re autistic than if you’re not? I recently spoke to a therapist because of self-harm and a worsening idea that everyone dislikes me even though I know I have no reason to think so...

9. I hope you're doing well? Why is it that when you ‘start’ trauma work things seem to be worse? My psychologist got me to write out a list of events, scenarios etc of what has happened in my life that I would feel like I would blow...

10. What causes someone like myself to get stuck in (or with) suicidal ideation? Is it because I haven’t worked through every aspect of the trauma? Or is it because I am constantly being triggered?

Religious Trauma Video https://youtu.be/7HwSGXPKzw8
Video of episodes https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs58xfxPpjVARRuwjH8usfw

Kati's books in stores now!
TRAUMATIZED - https://geni.us/Bfak0j
ARE U OK? - http://bit.ly/2s0mULy

Amazon Suggestions https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton

ONLINE THERAPY  I do not currently offer online therapy.  BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online counselor, please visit: https://tryonlinetherapy.com/katimorton
I receive commissions on referrals to BetterHelp. I only recommend services I know and trust.

PATREON   https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/

Opinions That Don't Matter! (2nd podcast)
video https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs58xfxPpjVARRuwjH8usfw
audio https://opionstdm.buzzsprout.com/

BUSINESS EMAIL [email protected]

Ask Kati Anything! the Kati Morton podcast ep.83

Audience Questions
1. Can you give us an overview of what a therapist does vs a psychologist? What’s the difference between therapy and psychotherapy? Would someone who struggles in all different areas benefit from seeing a psychologist rather than a therapist? For example, if someone has autism, C-PTSD, OCD, and an eating disorder, would a therapist be able to help them... 

2. If you (as a therapist) have seen a client for a long time, do you notice if he or she feels sadder in a therapy session than usual?  

3. What is the first thing that goes through your head (a therapist’s head) when a client starts to cry? (COMMENT: Or has a panic attack or starts dissociating badly (as in can not move, see or talk) in session? 

4. I hope you’re having a great week! I got sick a while ago and was in the hospital for a few weeks. Ever since then, I’ve been missing and craving the kindness and attention I received from nurses and doctors while there. I’ve never experienced anything...

5. How can I stop myself from being annoyed by little things out of my control? Often, I get upset about unreasonable stuff like people talking in a car, waking up 15 mins late even when I can afford to, shops not having what I want...

6. Did you have a favourite patient you were seeing? I guess you´re not supposed to have favourites but I imagine it's hard not to like some patients more than others. Also I want my therapist to like me the most and I wish she would tell me I'm her favourite...

7. A little while ago as I was crying on the floor I just completely lost my ability to feel any emotions for about 15 hours where it eventually slowly came back. It felt like losing a sense and I’m really confused by it and didn’t like it...

8.  I have a difficult relationship with food. It’s almost impossible for me to eat if I am with people. I make it look like I eat most of the time. If there is absolutely no getting around it,  then I can force myself, just so there isn’t a scene but it makes me really uncomfortable...

9. I hope you have a wonderful day. My question is; how can I notice when my eating disorder thoughts are trying to sneak in on me again? I find that my eating disorder voice is difficult to distinguish from me and my other thoughts and therefore I do not notice the signs until my therapist eventually notices them for me. I hope it makes sense... 


Video of episodes https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs58xfxPpjVARRuwjH8usfw

Kati's books in stores now!
TRAUMATIZED - https://geni.us/Bfak0j
ARE U OK? - http://bit.ly/2s0mULy

Amazon Suggestions https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton

ONLINE THERAPY  I do not currently offer online therapy.  BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online counselor, please visit: https://tryonlinetherapy.com/katimorton
I receive commissions on referrals to BetterHelp. I only recommend services I know and trust.

PATREON   https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/

Opinions That Don't Matter! (2nd podcast)
video https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs58xfxPpjVARRuwjH8usfw
audio https://opionstdm.buzzsprout.com/

BUSINESS EMAIL [email protected]

Ask Kati Anything podcast with Dr. Alexa Altman | ep.84

Audience questions:
1. For the past 6 months I now realise that I dissociate. I didn't realise up until now because I had only heard of the more severe types of dissociation. My therapist told me that some people who dissociate can go for long periods of time and not remember...

2. I really struggle with boundaries. I recently went to my teacher to talk about mental health struggles, and she...

3. Do you think it's possible for our struggles e.g. anxiety, depression, lack of self worth to ever go away completely? I feel like there are some things, my anxiety...

4. I am trying to work on recalling events surrounding a traumatic situation to be able to make a statement to police and assist with other cases that may be linked to...

5. I keep downplaying my symptoms and even contemplate canceling my therapy sessions sometimes. I'm not quite sure why I'm...

6. Why are a lot of therapists unwilling to work with autistic clients even if they're not coming to therapy for their autism?

7. How does one handle being triggered by their own therapist?  I have PTSD, and have been very open with my therapist about my trauma that occurred last year, and my struggles with it.  As a whole, I absolutely have loved working with her, and have felt very safe in discussing my experiences...

8. Is it possible to feel triggered from a past sexual assault after having a baby?? I was sexually assaulted when I was 20 in my home. I wasn’t ready for therapy after the assault so I stopped showing up and couldn’t find it in me to...

Video of episodes https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs58xfxPpjVARRuwjH8usfw

Kati's books in stores now!
TRAUMATIZED - https://geni.us/Bfak0j
ARE U OK? - http://bit.ly/2s0mULy

Amazon Suggestions https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton

ONLINE THERAPY  I do not currently offer online therapy.  BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online counselor, please visit: https://tryonlinetherapy.com/katimorton
I receive commissions on referrals to BetterHelp. I only recommend services I know and trust.

PATREON   https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/

Opinions That Don't Matter! (2nd podcast)
video https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs58xfxPpjVARRuwjH8usfw
audio https://opionstdm.buzzsprout.com/

BUSINESS EMAIL [email protected]

Ask Kati Anything episode 85

Questions:
1. Is it “normal” to constantly talk to yourself? basically whenever i’m alone i’ll be having full on conversations out loud to myself. feel like half the time it’s just maladaptive dreaming and i’ll be talking about something I...

2. How do you treat trauma that you don't remember? I can hardly remember my childhood, but sometimes I have emotional flashbacks in response to certain questions in therapy. Without pictures or sounds...

3. I hope you are doing well! Could you talk a bit more about emotional abuse? A few months ago, I realized that I was emotionally abused for 6 years during my teenage years. As I am trying to deal with it...

4. When I was in high school I used to thought stop every emotional thought I had. I convinced myself I was emotionless when really all I did was repress everything. I always tried to use logic and facts to counter my...

5. I have started seeing a new trauma therapist and have seen her for a month. I get on well with her and although I'm struggling to open up, she has been really reassuring which is what I need to hear. The problem I...

6. How can I get more comfortable again with social contacts after 1.5 years of the pandemic? I have always been a highly introverted person with a rather limited need for close social relations. In principle, I am very...

7. How can I deal with the anxiety of losing my therapist? I know she says she won´t leave but I´m still scared she will. Is there anything I can do to conquer that fear?

8. What advice would you give to a person who you care about, but not a patient, whose trauma includes therapy-derived traumas? Several episodes ago, you talked about a therapist you believe was acting unethically. 

9. Can one sibling have problems while others don’t? I’m a triplet. And I feel so left out with all events I have had to share with my other two siblings. Even through I had a hard enough time having family occasions because my one older brother molested me. I feel so stupid for caring so much about how I didn’t want to...

Video of episodes https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs58xfxPpjVARRuwjH8usfw

Kati's books in stores now!
TRAUMATIZED - https://geni.us/Bfak0j
ARE U OK? - http://bit.ly/2s0mULy

Amazon Suggestions https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton

ONLINE THERAPY  I do not currently offer online therapy.  BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online counselor, please visit: https://tryonlinetherapy.com/katimorton
I receive commissions on referrals to BetterHelp. I only recommend services I know and trust.

PATREON   https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/

Opinions That Don't Matter! (2nd podcast)
video https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs58xfxPpjVARRuwjH8usfw
audio https://opionstdm.buzzsprout.com/

BUSINESS EMAIL [email protected]

Do therapists get annoyed with their patients? Ask Kati Anything podcast ep. 82

1. Do therapists ever get annoyed when clients say “I don't know” a lot during sessions? I find myself saying I don't know to questions in sessions...

2. Do you ever get annoyed with your patients? I feel like I am annoying my therapist because I repeat judging myself and she keeps telling me that it's her job to sort through my thoughts and I should...

3. Do you have any advice on talking to therapists about their reactions to things said in therapy? Recently I disclosed to my therapist details about a specific instance of childhood sexual abuse that I have always...

4. Slowly but surely I'm recovering from my burn-out. Now I'm wondering what I should do with my life. Something needs to change and I know for the sake of my own mental health that I need to quit my job...

5. Why do people not realize the abuse/toxic relationship/etc. they're in while it's happening? I didn't think I had been sexually assaulted until recently despite having an understanding of what sexual assault...

6. Would you consider being closeted a form of trauma? I came out at 18/19 after I was closeted for about 3 years. I'm now 24 and feel like these 3 years still affect me daily. I taught myself to hold myself back in so many ways, especially in...

7. How do you get over past traumas? Once everything has been aired out in session I still don't understand how to deal with it or accept these facts. I still find myself replaying my past & it still makes me sad. How do you know if therapy is working for you? (COMMENT: And how can I get over my trauma, if it isolates me from people close to me and I can't talk to them about it? My mother sexually abused me...

8. How can I set boundaries, if I don’t even know where my boundaries are? Usually I feel like I don’t have boundaries. When someone looks at me I feel like they are already too close. And I can’t tell people not to look at me. Thank you for all you do. Have a lovely day. (COMMENT: I suck at setting boundaries too but similar to you when someone looks at me I feel like they know...

9. When therapists see clients with high suicide risks, what do you do to prevent them from carrying out the suicide plan?

10. I recently had a philosophy professor stand in front of the class and give a small lecture on self harm. we were talking about suicide and it’s relation to morals and that turned into a discussion on mutilation...

Video of episodes https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs58xfxPpjVARRuwjH8usfw

Kati's books in stores now!
TRAUMATIZED - https://geni.us/Bfak0j
ARE U OK? - http://bit.ly/2s0mULy

Amazon Suggestions https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton

ONLINE THERAPY  I do not currently offer online therapy.  BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online counselor, please visit: https://tryonlinetherapy.com/katimorton
I receive commissions on referrals to BetterHelp. I only recommend services I know and trust.

PATREON   https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/

Opinions That Don't Matter! (2nd podcast)
video https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs58xfxPpjVARRuwjH8usfw
audio https://opionstdm.buzzsprout.com/

BUSINESS EMAIL [email protected]

Ask Kati Anything podcast ep.80

Audience questions:
1. What advice do you have when CBT doesn’t seem to be working? I have been diagnosed with GAD, and I know it’s supposed to be the gold standard for anxiety, but I feel like it isn’t doing anything for me. I can identify what is causing my anxiety/ all the distortions in my...

2. How do you know what to say as a therapist? I get that your education and practice help a lot but what about in the beginning (your first few clients). How do you know what questions to ask so that...

3. As kids my parents spanked my siblings and I. We were always scared when our father would be the one to discipline us. Now looking back at that time as a kid I feel...

4. How many sessions are necessary before trusting a therapist? I had 20+ sessions with my former therapist and still didn’t trust her and didn’t feel safe enough to share my trauma fully. I recently...

5. How do I stop worrying about my therapist even when I logically know I don't have to? We have talked about my people-pleasing and how being aware of how other people are feeling was a survival skill from childhood. I notice how my therapist tries to make sure that she doesn't look tired...

6. I was SAed about 10 years ago by a good friend and have only very recently been working through it. I’ve done a lot of great work with my therapist and various other wonderful resources, but it’s weird for me to be moving forward - if that can even make sense. I can tell I’ve grown so much in the past year, but a part of me...

7. I'm over 18 and I want to start talking with my therapist about possible (sexual) abuse sustained as a child. However, I still live with the person that supposedly caused me harm and I feel like whatever happened to me wasn't a big deal since I'm only...

8. How do you deal with your therapist/therapy being your only 'safe' space? I've been in therapy for over 10years (not continuously there was a few years gap) and I've been extremely...

9. How can I get comfortable with the idea of spacing out my sessions and eventually ending therapy? I've been seeing my therapist for...

10. Thank you for all your work. Your videos and podcast have helped me so much. I have a question concerning trauma therapy. I recently started, and felt really good about it, in the sense that I felt safe and I trust my therapist...

Video version of episodes https://youtu.be/WG-j4vtcYIs

Kati's Amazon Suggestions https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton

ONLINE THERAPY

I do not currently offer online therapy.  My sponsor BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online counselor, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati

PATREON  https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/

1. Why do therapists often like to sit and silently observe you for an uncomfortable amount of time? It happens when the conversation slows down and everything goes quiet and they just sit looking at you...

2. How can you tell apart when your worrying has a legitimate reason and when it's just caused by your anxiety / perfectionism? I'm always worrying I won't work hard enough for my university, that my boyfriend will leave me, that I'm not trying hard enough in therapy...

3. I hope you are well! I was wondering, do you have any tips to keep your brain from freezing up or going blank when talking about trauma? I recently started having what I think are recovered memories of sexual abuse, but I don't know for sure if...

4. How do you handle it when a patient gives you “doorknob disclosure”? Is it common? Do most therapists find it annoying? Is there a reason some patients do this?

5. My question is... How are you? A few weeks or months ago you told us that you were taking a (much deserved) break due to stress...

6. How do you know when you're "drowning in the symptoms" enough to warrant medication?  For me,  I'm just on antidepressants which (according to my doctor) isn't specifically aimed at curbing my anxiety symptoms. So I still experience anxiety/panic attacks, but they are way less frequent. I have skills to aid me, which work, but it can take me a few days to find my feet again...

7. Could it be beneficial to go to a therapist who reminds you of people who have hurt you in the past? I find myself having a hard time trusting my therapist because she reminds me of everyone who has hurt me before...

8. I have been wondering how people "view" their memories. I often recall memories from a 3rd person perspective, i.e. I see myself doing something rather than from my own perspective/ eyes. Is this the norm or...

9. What if you’re half ready for recovery? What can you do? I want to get better, but I don’t want to put in the effort it takes to use the skills. Sometimes I forget they exist and other times I just don’t do it.

10. I do not know if this is common, but do your clients ever tell you they don’t want to give up their eating disorder as a “puffer fish” mechanism? Like I find myself saying these things when I really don’t mean it, it is just easier to say I don’t want recovery over...

Video of episodes https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs58xfxPpjVARRuwjH8usfw

Kati's books in stores now!
TRAUMATIZED - https://geni.us/Bfak0j
ARE U OK? - http://bit.ly/2s0mULy

Amazon Suggestions https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton

ONLINE THERAPY  I do not currently offer online therapy.  BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online counselor, please visit: https://tryonlinetherapy.com/katimorton
I receive commissions on referrals to BetterHelp. I only recommend services I know and trust.

PATREON   https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/

Opinions That Don't Matter! (2nd podcast)
video https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs58xfxPpjVARRuwjH8usfw
audio https://opionstdm.buzzsprout.com/

BUSINESS EMAIL [email protected]

Ask Kati Anything ep.79 - Kati Morton's Mental Health & Psychology Podcast

1) How much of our childhood is normal to remember? I remember some things, but not a ton. My family life was fine growing up, I had loving parents, but I experienced bullying at school and social isolation because of that. I'm wondering if me not remembering stuff is because of the "trauma" of bullying or if it is just normal not to...

2) Are suicidal thoughts dangerous when they aren't exactly in the near future or planned? I personally had this thought that once I start university I won't be able to handle the extra fears as I...

3) I think you never talked about helicopter parents and the effects they have on children. What if instead of emotional neglect you receive so much attention and emotional presence from a parent you don’t learn how to operate on your own? How can one overcome the embarrassment...

4) I have recently started seeing a trauma therapist. I like her but I haven’t really opened up about anything yet since I’m scared she won’t believe me and I’ll shut down like I usually do in session. How do I overcome my fear of not being believed by my therapist?

5) How can I try not to let my depression take over too much when there are many changes going to happen? I´ll be moving soon and should start a program that helps me get better but I'm letting myself sulk in self pity and don't want to do anything but sleep all day. I fear I won't be able to get...

6) Is it still considered sexual abuse if it happens between children who are only a year apart in age?  Like when one child is 8 and the other 9.  Does there have to be a big age difference for it to be considered sexual abuse or does age not matter?  Is it less traumatic if they are close in age?

7) How do I know if symptoms of one mental illness is their own illness or just part of another? After watching your videos on Borderline and googling the most common symptoms myself, I mustered up the courage to ask my therapist if she thought I might have certain Borderline tendencies.