On this week's Bachelor recap, Marni and Chris discuss Matt’s latest lackluster performance. Creating connection requires warmth and he is cool as a cucumber. They also make their predictions of who will be the frontrunner in this dating contest. And, Marni extracts dating advice for your real-life scenarios.

 

Key takeaways from this episode: 

• Knowing when it is not a match
• After a tough breakup, when it is time to date again
• How to create connection and warmth
• How to know if a guy is insincere

 

Gracefully Bowing Out of a Relationship [2:24]

Serena didn’t put herself, or Matt, at any risk of being emotional when she asked Matt about the Maple Leafs. The first time we saw this on the show was during the yoga date. Intimacy may not be her thing. But, kudos to her when she realizes Matt is not her person she excuses herself from the contest. 

Marni wants to applaud her for telling Matt it wasn't going to work and she is not ready. During the telephone call with her mother, her mom said, ‘that last relationship really did a number on you didn’t it?’ If Serena is still wounded from her last relationship it could be what is holding her back from forging a connection. 

Chris asks Marni how a woman knows that she is ready to date again after a gnarly breakup? 

If you think you are ready try dating again if old stuff bubbles up, take another pause from dating. We all have baggage, it is OK.

 

How to Create Connection [16:29]

Amy Cuddy, a Social Psychologist who studies body language says that there are two things people evaluate unconsciously: warmth and confidence. We try to figure out if the other person is trustworthy. 

It made Marni think of Matt.  Because he is not warm on the show and he does not show up as empowered or confident. Those are the three principles to creating connection with people.

Is there is a gap between who you are and who you think you are supposed to be when dating? 

Lead with warmth, follow with confidence! 

 

Is Matt James Insincere? [25:23] 

Bri opens up to Matt and says 'I love you', his response is ‘thank you for sharing’. That is his go-to phrase and Marni wanted to slap him for it. He seems really insincere that he says that as a response every time a girl gets vulnerable.  

So, who do Marni and Chris think is the frontrunner after this past episode of the show? Both believe Matt will pick Rachel because during their date he said ‘I think I am falling in love with you.’ 

Data shows when two people experience the same thing for the first time together it creates intimacy. 

 

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