This episode of the Bachelorette features a virgin, a best lover contest, and lots of tongue tennis. Marni and Chris discuss Katie’s questioning style, why it’s important not to rule someone out too soon, and early predictions of the challenges Katie faces this season. 

 

Key takeaways from this episode: 

• Kissing and sex on TV, good or bad?
• How to use open-ended questions to collect more data
• Dating a guy with a fetish
• It is refreshing to see people kiss with their eyes closed

I Wanna Be Your Lover  [1:13]

 In this episode, Katie played the ‘Best Lover’ game with the guys. Each guy had the opportunity to turn her on and to share an example of how they would be the best lover to her if they had a future together. 

Marni and Chris have different views about all of the spit swapping taking place on the show. Marni doesn’t mind watching the intimate moments but Chris thinks the kissing was gross. He says it is equivalent to watching fish in a barrel fighting over food pellets. He leans into the possibility that Greg is a good kisser, but watching the cat guy suck face was more than he could bear. At least, they both agree, that everyone closed their eyes unlike Matt James of the Bachelor.

Doesn’t it seem like these guys are nerdier than past Bachelorette studs of previous seasons?

Katie ended up giving the rose to Mike P., the virgin of the group and the honor of being tagged the greatest lover of all time. 

 

The 3 Date Rule  [10:16]

It’s not for everyone, but Katie goes camping with Greg for their first date. Chris and Marni agree it is a long time to spend with someone, especially if red flags appear. But, this is the Bachelorette and not exactly real-life dating. 

At Dating with Dignity, the team recommends clients go on three dates before ruling someone out. Everyone deserves a second chance and even if you are not enjoying yourself try using the date to practice and hone your dating skills. Maintain eye contact, practice listening, and be optimistic about the other person.  

On the show, Katie brings up her father’s death during the camping trip. Greg's reaction to what she shared was sweet but extremely subtle. Marni thought it was sweet. Chris and the guys watching the show with them thought his reaction meant Greg wasn’t into Katie, saying that the way he pulled back seemed like a red flag. Then later, Greg revealed his Dad also passed, changing Chris’ perception. Maybe Greg didn’t want to cry on camera? 

Going on three dates offers a guy the chance to open up and be vulnerable. Remember, there may be stuff below the surface we don't see at first glance.

 

  Questions and Curiosities [29:35]

Marni and Chris discuss the hard interview style Katie used when asking Cody about his character. Marni points out that ‘yes’ and ‘no’ questions only get you ‘yes’ and ‘no’ answers. So, say no to the checklist! A better dating strategy is to share a little something about yourself then ask a curious question, such as ‘Do you relate to that at all?’. Open-ended questions will extract more information and make the guy more willing to share his feelings.

Early predictions about Katie on this season of the Bachelorette:

• She may have trouble collecting data about the guys.
• She may be protecting herself and have her guard up.

 

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