Back from the Borderline

Anger is one of our most intense and often misunderstood emotions, but what if this powerful feeling could be used as a tool for personal growth? In this episode, we explore the difference between healthy and unhealthy anger, and ask: is society’s view of anger to blame for the “unhealthy” ways we express it? We’ll dive into practical anger management strategies and effective techniques for releasing anger and rage, uncovering how to recognize and work with anger in a way that strengthens self-awareness and emotional well-being.

Discover the concept of anger as a secondary emotion, what it truly reveals about our deeper needs, and how unprocessed anger may lead to destructive patterns in our lives. We’ll also discuss the spiritual meaning of anger and its potential to act as a pathway for healing and transformation. Whether you’re dealing with frequent anger, navigating deep-seated rage, or simply want to understand the role anger plays in your life, this episode provides actionable insights and emotional tools for growth.

Topics covered in this episode include:

• Healthy vs. unhealthy expressions of anger
• How cultural beliefs affect our relationship with anger
• Tips for managing anger, from grounding exercises to mindfulness practices
• Understanding anger as a response to deeper emotions
• Exploring the spiritual aspects of anger for personal development

If you’ve ever struggled to control or understand your anger, this episode will help you harness this powerful emotion to cultivate self-compassion, resilience, and balance in your life.

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

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Dissociation can feel like slipping out of reality itself—but what’s really going on when we disconnect from our surroundings or even from ourselves?

In this episode, we take an in-depth look at dissociation, breaking down its subtypes, including derealization (feeling detached from the world around you) and depersonalization (feeling detached from yourself). We explore how dissociation is often tied to trauma and how it manifests differently for those who experience it. From grounding techniques to mindful awareness, this episode offers practical tools to help you manage these unsettling moments and reconnect to the present. We also address the deeply isolating feeling of “going crazy” that can accompany dissociation and discuss how to seek supportive resources for ongoing dissociative experiences. Whether dissociation is something you experience often or only occasionally, this episode provides insights to help you understand, manage, and ultimately feel less alone in the experience.

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What if the pursuit of a “strong sense of self” is actually keeping us trapped in cycles of suffering? In this episode, we unravel the complexities of identity disturbance, especially as it relates to the “Favorite Person” dynamic often seen with BPD traits. We’ll explore how attaching our sense of self to others can lead to feelings of emptiness and imposter syndrome, questioning whether common therapeutic goals like developing self-esteem might sometimes do more harm than good.

Drawing on the Buddhist principle of anatta, or “non-self,” we’ll examine how loosening the grip on identity can open up new pathways for healing. You’ll also learn why mindfulness can feel challenging when we’re overly focused on the concept of self—and discover techniques for becoming more present without being bound by rigid ideas of who we think we are.

This episode offers a fresh perspective on the pursuit of identity, inviting you to see beyond labels and discover what might lie on the other side of “self.”

Recommended resources: “The Fiction of the Self - The Paradox of Mindfulness in Clinical Practice” by Ronald Siegel

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Splitting, or “all-or-nothing” thinking, is one of the most challenging cognitive distortions out there, often leading to strain and misunderstandings in our relationships. But splitting is just one piece of a much larger puzzle. Many of us experience various cognitive distortions—faulty thought patterns that shape our perceptions and can fuel emotional suffering. In this episode, we’ll break down the most common types of cognitive distortions and explore powerful tools to help you recognize and question these patterns. We’ll dive into cognitive restructuring and Socratic questioning, two techniques designed to help you gain clarity and shift distorted beliefs that may be holding you back. Inspired by Viktor Frankl’s methods of self-observation, we’ll also discuss how cultivating a higher perspective—zooming out to view your life from a broader vantage point—can reduce suffering and promote inner peace.

Topics covered in this episode include:

• Recognizing and understanding cognitive distortions
• How changing core beliefs can create lasting inner peace
• Viktor Frankl’s insights on meta-awareness and how to apply them
• The importance of perspective-taking in reducing emotional suffering
• Practical steps for cognitive restructuring
• How to use Socratic questioning to challenge distorted thoughts and beliefs

This episode offers actionable steps to help you shift your mindset, build self-awareness, and uncover a more balanced, peaceful way of seeing the world.

Recommended resources: Cognitive restructuring and Socratic questioning worksheet

Enjoyed this episode? Explore more as a Premium Submarine. Dive deep into hundreds of hours of exclusive content on Patreon, including my original BPD recovery series, guided meditations, and much more. Click here to preview the premium collections you’ll unlock access to for as little as a couple of cups of coffee a month. Learn more and join at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

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Have you ever wondered why so many mental health treatments seem to scratch the surface but don’t quite reach the root of what’s going on? For those who resonate with mental health disorder labels, the journey often begins and ends with skills-based therapies like DBT or CBT. While coping techniques can help us manage day-to-day challenges, these approaches rarely address the bigger picture—the societal narratives and systemic forces shaping how we see ourselves. Many people complete treatment programs only to find themselves still feeling unanchored, searching for identity and meaning.

In this episode, we’re taking a deep dive into narrative therapy and the concept of agency, examining how these tools can help us reclaim our stories and change the way we see our struggles. We’ll explore externalization, a technique that allows you to step back from negative thought patterns and take control of your life. Along the way, we’ll discuss cognitive distortions and how they keep us trapped in cycles of self-doubt and frustration. We’ll also confront the damaging narratives perpetuated in mental health discourse and consider the profound impact they can have on those in recovery.

Key topics we’ll cover include:

• The power of agency and why having a say in our own narrative matters
• What narrative therapy is, and how it’s being applied to those with BPD and other labels
• Externalization as a way to reclaim your identity from harmful labels and thought patterns
• Recognizing and addressing cognitive distortions that fuel negative thinking
• The often-overlooked role of societal narratives in shaping our mental health and recovery journey

This episode challenges traditional approaches to mental health, inviting you to see yourself through a new lens—one where you’re not just coping, but actively rewriting your story on your own terms.

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If you no longer viewed your symptoms as proof of being “disordered” but as a part of your brain’s natural, adaptive design, how would that reshape your self-understanding? How would it impact the hope you hold for your future? For millions, the prevailing belief is that symptoms of mental distress stem from chemical imbalances or genetic flaws—issues inherited and hardwired. But groundbreaking research by Dr. Joanna Moncrieff is challenging this very foundation, shaking up the psychiatric field and prompting us to question: What if our brains are simply doing their best to keep us safe?

In today’s episode, I sit down with philosophy professor and author Justin Garson to explore this revolutionary perspective. Together, we’ll delve into how painful symptoms can be seen less as evidence of dysfunction, and more as deeply rooted responses that have adapted over time, especially through childhood. Our early experiences leave profound imprints, shaping how we perceive the world, relationships, and even ourselves. But what if recognizing these imprints as survival mechanisms could offer a path toward real change?

Join us as we reframe the entire concept of mental health, shifting from labels of disorder to stories of resilience and adaptation. This episode invites you to see yourself in a radically new light—one where healing means understanding, rather than “fixing” who you are.

Recommended resources:

■ Full article by Justin Garson - "Is Borderline Personality Disorder an Adaptation?"

■ Justin's website - https://www.justingarson.com/

■ Research by Joanna Moncrieff et. al - "The serotonin theory of depression: a systematic umbrella review of the evidence" (July 2022)

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

For many who resonate with symptoms associated with various different mental health disorder/dysfunction labels, the journey to “getting better” often begins with therapy and learning skills through methods like CBT or DBT. But what happens when those skills still don’t seem to bring the sense of peace or fulfillment you’re looking for? You’ve done the research, tried the techniques, yet find yourself feeling perpetually empty or caught in cycles of boredom and dissatisfaction. In this episode, we dig deeper—under the surface of symptoms—to explore the “why” behind our suffering. We’ll take a closer look at the way our brains chase happiness, fueled by biology and a relentless search for the next dopamine fix. This constant chase keeps us in a loop, always seeking the next “desirable” thing or person. By examining what happiness really means and breaking down some common misconceptions about it, we can start to see our lives and relationships through a new lens.

In this episode, we’ll cover:

• The concept of “Dukkha bias” and why we often feel like nothing is ever good enough
• The link between chronic boredom, emptiness, and high emotional sensitivity
• How our constant drive for desire can become a source of suffering—and what we can do about it
• Insights into human biology and how it perpetuates a cycle of never-ending needs
• A framework for defining happiness on your own terms, free from societal expectations

Join me as we peel back the layers of what it means to seek happiness and enter a path toward true and lasting recovery that isn’t about quick fixes, but rather a deeper understanding of ourselves.

Recommended resources: 

■ Book - Designing the Mind: The Principles of Psychitecture by Ryan Bush

■ YouTube - Interview with the author of Designing the Mind on the Modern Wisdom Podcast

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Most of us are well aware of the patterns we want to break—the cycles that keep us from experiencing true peace and intimacy. We can see the behaviors that sabotage our connections, but knowing isn’t the same as changing. One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned on my own journey is that transforming our beliefs is essential to transforming our actions. In this episode, we’ll explore some of the deeply held beliefs that might be holding you back, and I’ll share why a temporary break from social media might become a lasting one for me. We’ll dive into how major platforms are shifting from “social media” to “recommendation media” and the effect this can have on our emotional well-being. I’ll also address a recent review that questioned my stance on the BPD label and why I continue to challenge the potential harms of labels that can reinforce limiting beliefs about ourselves.

Topics we’ll explore include:

• The impact of social media on emotional stability, particularly for those with high emotional sensitivity
• Whether mental health labels like “borderline personality disorder” are helpful or limiting
• How cognitive biases and “splitting” can affect our healing process
• The importance of adopting a “growth mindset” to improve communication and build healthier relationships
• Understanding and managing “obsessive” tendencies, such as constantly checking a partner’s social media
• Practical tips for navigating romantic relationships when intense emotions are part of the mix

This episode is a deep dive into how shifting your beliefs can open the door to new patterns, healthier relationships, and a more grounded approach to self-discovery and growth.

Recommended resources: 

■ Article – “The End of Social Media and the Rise of Recommendation Media” by Michael Mignano

■ Article – The people who want to get rid of the term ‘personality disorder’ by Emily Reynolds for Dazed Digital

■ Book – Designing the Mind: The Principles of Psychitecture by Ryan Bush

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Former Nickelodeon child-star Jennette McCurdy's provocatively titled memior “I’m Glad My Mom Died” became a near-instant New York Times bestseller after its release in August 2022. The Audible version of the book is narrated by Jeanette herself and details her struggles with disordered eating, alcohol addiction, OCD, unstable relationships and – most notably – her extremely complicated relationship with her codependent, overbearing, and abusive mother. In this episode, I discuss my reflections on the book. Through dissecting Jeannette’s experiences she so bravely shared in this memoir, we’ll dive into what we can learn about parentification, enmeshment (also known as “emotional incest”) and the devastating impact these kinds of toxic family dynamics can have on childhood development that carry on far into adulthood. 

Questions answered and topics explored in this episode:

■ The exploitation of children in the entertainment industry (the trauma faced by child actors)

■ The devastating impact of emotionally immature and “narcissistic” parents

■ Signs you may have suffered childhood emotional incest (also known as “covert incest”)

■ Signs you were a parentified child (the damage parentification can have on highly sensitive children)

■ “The narcissistic mother” (the long-term effects these traits have on their daughters)

■ How childhood trauma can lead to adult identity problems

■ How children of cancer patients can experience post-traumatic stress disorder (parental cancer and its psychosocial impact on children)

Recommended resources:

■ I'm Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy

■ The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self by Alice Miller

Craving more? Become a Premium Submarine. Join an exclusive community and unlock hundreds of hours of members-only content: full-length episodes, deep-dive series, guided meditations, and more—all for the cost of a couple of coffees a month. Start exploring at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In a recent interview with Howard Stern, 20-year-old singer-songwriter Billie Eilish revealed the devastating impact that having access to hardcore pornography from as early as age 11 had on her self-image and sexuality. In this episode, we delve into Billie's comments and explore the harmful effects of online porn on millennials and Gen-Z. Additionally, we discuss the potential increased risk of negative impact on individuals who experience symptoms of mental health disorder labels, including borderline personality disorder. Tune in to gain insight into the complex issue of easy access to porn and its effects on mental health and sexuality.

Key timestamps in this conversation:

02:00 – Discussion of our “quote of the week” by Stoic philosopher Epictetus (exploring how those who identify with symptoms of BPD can learn to tackle our issues with control)

08:00 – Billie Eilish’s comments on porn and an in-depth exploration on sexuality and mental health disorder labels

50:00 – Preview of this week’s premium episode on “borderline abuse”

Questions answered in this episode:

■ The impact easy access to porn has in our developmental years

■ The negative effects of porn on expectations of sex and body image

■ How the overuse of porn can negatively impact your mental health

■ The role mental health symptoms can play in your sex life and perception of intimacy 

■ What is “borderline abuse” (“borderline abuse”) and is it a real thing?

Enjoyed this episode? Explore more as a Premium Submarine. Dive deep into hundreds of hours of exclusive content on Patreon, including my original BPD recovery series, guided meditations, and much more. Click here to preview the premium collections you’ll unlock access to for as little as a couple of cups of coffee a month. Learn more and join at backfromtheborderline.com.

The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.