Simple Families

Be Like Bamboo


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I’m going to start today off with a quote: 

“We’re often afraid that if we give our kids an inch, they will take a mile. Every single grain of rice in their bowl must be eaten up, every toy in its proper place, every “I” dotted and “t” crossed. We believe this is comforting to our kids, knowing that their parent will always be steady and unchanging. We mean what we say and say what we mean. Rarely will we make an exception or change direction mid-course. We are solid and dependable: like steel. 

Unfortunately the Titanic was also made from steel and we all know what happened there. 

We are so strict with our rules that our consistency becomes rigidity. But what happens to something hard and rigid when it meets with a blow? 

It breaks easily. 

The very strictness that we think makes us strong actually makes us brittle. Instead of steel, we can strive to be more like bamboo, firm yet flexible.”


Iris Chen, UntigeringThis quote comes from Untigering, a book by today’s guest Iris Chen. In Untigering, she shares her journey of leaving behind authoritarian tiger parenting to embrace a respectful, relational way of raising children. As a Chinese American mom, she draws from her experiences of living in both North America and Asia and offers insights and practices. [Book excerpt]

You can find Iris on Instagram, and website, and her book Untigering: Peaceful Parenting for the Deconstructing Tiger Parent is available wherever books are sold.


The post Be Like Bamboo appeared first on Simple Families.

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Simple FamiliesBy Denaye Barahona Ph.D.

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