In this episode, I break down the difference between comparing and studying — and why one leads to despair while the other leads to growth. We’re going to talk about how comparison quietly attacks your identity, and how to shift into a mindset that builds strategy instead of shame.

In this episode:

• Why “comparison leads to despair” is psychologically true
• The difference between ranking yourself and studying patterns
• How comparison turns into identity damage
• Why studying others builds skill without shrinking your self-worth
• A simple mindset shift you can use immediately

Stop asking, “Where do I rank?”

Start asking, “What can I learn?”Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

In this episode, I reflect on my time leading a cottage at a group home and how stepping into a leadership role challenged my identity, anxiety, and desire to just be the “fun guy.” I unpack the psychological shift from being liked to being responsible, and how consistent structure reduced chaos, stress, and mental overload — ultimately allowing me to lead with both authority and warmth.

• Why I initially hated being in charge despite caring deeply about the kids and staff
• The internal conflict between being the fun, relational leader vs. enforcing rules and boundaries
• How anxiety, rumination, and self-doubt intensify in leadership roles
• The realization that structure (being “the law”) creates the conditions for fun and connection
• How consistency and staff alignment helped the environment run itself over time
• Why silence, avoidance, and unclear expectations increase stress for everyone
• A key reframe: you may not hate leadership — you may hate unstructured chaos
• Practical takeaway: clarity, consistency, and support reduce mental load and make leadership sustainable

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

In this episode, I talk about what it really means to be touch starved — not in a dramatic way, but in a nervous-system way. I break down why safe, consensual touch matters for our mental health and how we can get more of it in simple, intentional ways.

• What “touch starved” actually means
• Why lack of touch increases stress and anxiety
• How we used to experience touch vs. now
• Small, practical ways to get healthy touch
• The surprising ways people try to replace it

Are you stressed… or do you just need a hug?

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

I’m taking a short hiatus from the podcast to rest and reset. In the meantime, I encourage you to stay connected to at least one person, keep a small daily routine, and revisit the few episodes that truly helped you instead of consuming everything at once.

Build a simple support list, do one meaningful thing each week, and please reach out to professional or crisis support if you’re struggling — this podcast is support, not a substitute for care.

I’ll be back soon. And more importantly, I want you to be here when I return.

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

When someone says, “Everyone would be better off without me,” it sounds selfless — but what if it’s a distortion built on the wrong currency of worth? In this episode, we unpack the hidden assumptions behind that belief, from perceived burdensomeness to shame, control, and the quiet fear of being irredeemable.

• Why “better” is often measured by productivity, not meaning
• How depression turns imagination into certainty
• The difference between removal and redemption

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

What does it mean to feel like the outsider in your own family — the one who gets blamed, ignored, or quietly cast as “the problem”? In this episode, we explore the psychology of scapegoating, why families assign roles, and how to stop seeking validation from a system that may never give it. It’s about moving from exile to self-acceptance — and building belonging on your own terms.

In This Episode:

• What family scapegoating actually is (and why it happens)
• The emotional cost of being “the identified problem”
• How family systems protect themselves — not necessarily the truth
• The difference between alienation and individuation
• Grieving the family you hoped for
• Finding acceptance without needing unanimous approval

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

Is the real crisis today economic — or architectural? In this episode, we challenge the idea that loneliness and despair come from a broken ladder of upward mobility. What if the problem isn’t that we can’t climb… but that we were taught to measure our worth by climbing in the first place? Drawing from Middlemarch, modern work culture, and personal experience, this conversation explores why craftsmanship, authorship, and daily building may be the antidote to vertical despair.

In this episode:

• Why the “career ladder” mindset fuels anxiety and comparison
• The difference between climbing and building
• How craftsmanship creates internal pride (and hunger)
• What Lydgate’s crisis in Middlemarch teaches us about collapsed ambition
• Why being seen — not promoted — can save a life
• The power of asking: “Am I actually in danger right now?”
• Moving from passive consumption to generative action
• How to build meaning even when the system feels unstable

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

In this episode, we explore how poverty affects mental health and increases suicide risk, particularly through relative deprivation, structural barriers, and unclaimed government aid. We look at why poverty is more than a lack of money—it’s instability, stress, and social exclusion—and what coping strategies can help.

Topics covered include:

• How relative income deprivation can heighten feelings of hopelessness
• Why being poor in America is often more expensive due to fines, fees, and penalties
• The $140 billion in unused government aid and barriers to accessing it
• Coping strategies that protect dignity, stability, and mental health

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

In this episode, we use the metaphor of turbulence to explore why intense moments in life can feel dangerous without actually being dangerous—and how the nervous system responds when stability feels lost. Through a grounding practice designed for “arrival,” we offer listeners a simple way to reorient their bodies after emotional, relational, or existential turbulence, without needing to fix or explain anything.

In this episode, we cover:

• The four types of turbulence as metaphors for everyday life stress and emotional instability
• Why the nervous system confuses intensity with danger—and how that fuels distress
• How grounding is about orientation and arrival, not forced calm
• A single, practical grounding exercise listeners can use at the end of a long day or difficult period

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

Have you ever been told to “just relax” when your body felt like it was on high alert? In this episode, we unpack why that advice fails—and how suicide prevention requires understanding stress physiology, not willpower, by meeting the nervous system with safety before insight.

What we cover:

• Why “relax more” is a behavioral demand, not a biological solution
• The difference between calming thoughts and regulating a stressed nervous system
• Four sequencing shifts that actually help:
• Rhythmic movement instead of stillness
• Connection before introspection
• Predictability before positivity
• Regulation before reflection

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.