Before You Kill Yourself: a suicide prevention podcast.

A simple sentence may be one of the most powerful ways to make someone feel seen: "If it weren't for you..." Drawing from Jennifer Wallace's The Science of Mattering, this episode explores our deep need to know that we matter, why gratitude isn't always enough, and how sharing the impact someone has had on your life can transform both of you.

Topics include:

• The difference between gratitude and mattering
• Why humans need significance more than happiness
• The "Five People" exercise
• Why we avoid telling people they changed our lives
• How moments of mattering suspend time
• The people who may never know the impact they've had on us

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

Gambling Addiction: 1-800-GAMBLER

In this episode, we explore one of the most haunting lines from Kurt Cobain’s suicide note: “Why don’t you just enjoy it?” and the devastating response: “I don’t know.” We unpack why human beings struggle to feel joy through the lenses of neuroscience, psychology, evolution, trauma, addiction, overstimulation, and modern culture. From dopamine and cortisol to loneliness, achievement addiction, and the pressure to perform happiness, this episode examines why so many people feel disconnected from their own lives — and what history, philosophy, pop culture, and human connection reveal about truly feeling alive.

Topics include:

• Why the brain adapts to pleasure and novelty
• The difference between stimulation and fulfillment
• Trauma, stress, and the nervous system’s impact on joy
• Evolutionary reasons humans struggle with contentment
• Why modern life can make us spectators instead of participants
• The role of relationships, meaning, awe, and shared struggle
• Pop culture references from Nirvana to Black Mirror to Ted Lasso
• How to reconnect with ordinary moments and meaningful experiences
• What we might say to someone who can’t “just enjoy it”

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

Gambling Addiction: 1-800-GAMBLER

In this episode, we explore the idea that meaning often comes after action. Inspired by a lyric from Robyn’s new album Sexistential, we unpack the difference between therapy, philosophy, poetry, and relationships — and why artists, rappers, writers, and improvisers often don’t fully understand what they’re creating until after it’s made.

We discuss why overthinking can block transformation, how freestyle rap reveals unconscious truth, and why some of life’s deepest insights can only be discovered through participation rather than analysis.

Topics include:

• Therapy vs existential suffering
• Why philosophy answers different questions than psychology
• Freestyling, flow states, and unconscious creativity
• Carl Jung, Sartre, Kierkegaard, and existentialism
• Why meaning is often retrospective
• The danger of waiting for certainty before taking action
• Relationships as the ultimate test of self-awareness
• “You live your way into new thoughts”

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

Gambling Addiction: 1-800-GAMBLER

In this episode, we explore why mystery isn’t something to eliminate from life — it may be the very thing that keeps us moving, connecting, hoping, and growing. Beginning with a two-year mystery involving peanut shells appearing outside a house, the conversation expands into relationships, neuroscience, detective stories, fear, curiosity, and the courage to enter the unknown.

Topics include:

• Why humans are drawn to mysteries, whodunits, crosswords, and haunted houses
• The psychology of curiosity and how uncertainty activates the brain
• Why new relationships feel electric and emotionally alive
• The difference between healthy mystery and painful uncertainty
• How “let’s find out” can become a philosophy for living
• Why certainty can sometimes lead to boredom, paralysis, or emotional deadness
• Reflections on rejection, risk-taking, creativity, science, and wonder
• The idea that hope only exists when the future remains unwritten

Mysteries

(Listen) Mistletoe Murders: https://shorturl.at/qftcN

(Read) Fresh Water For Flowers: https://shorturl.at/mcjtL

(Watch) Chestnut Man: https://shorturl.at/R5qxK

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

How do we cope with the mental, emotional and physical pain? Survivors of lightning strikes and electrical shocks have lessons for us.

Key coping mechanisms:

• salt packets
• sauna
• massage
• group therapy
• mindset shift

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

Gambling Addiction: 1-800-GAMBLER

What if feeling trapped isn’t about having a bad life—but about having a life that leaves no room for you? Using Odysseus and The Odyssey, I explore the idea that sometimes we can have love, security, success, and comfort while still feeling profoundly disconnected from ourselves.

• Why Odysseus rejects Calypso’s version of paradise
• How your greatest strengths can become sources of suffering
• The difference between wanting your life to end and wanting your current life to change
• Why boredom, burnout, and entrapment can be signs of lost agency
• How asking “Where do I get to be myself?” can become a first step toward finding a way forward

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

Gambling Addiction: 1-800-GAMBLER

When a boss’s email, meeting request, or tone of feedback feels disproportionately intense, it may not be about the present moment alone. For many people, workplace dynamics can quietly reactivate older emotional patterns tied to childhood experiences of criticism, invisibility, powerlessness, or conditional approval. This episode explores how that happens—and how to recognize when the nervous system is responding to the past, not just the job.

In this episode:

• Why authority figures at work can unconsciously resemble early caregivers
• How simple workplace feedback can trigger shame, fear, or collapse
• The role of childhood experiences in shaping adult stress responses
• Why “professionalism” can sometimes override emotional self-protection
• How to tell the difference between present-day feedback and old emotional memory
• What it means to stay grounded when the body reacts before the mind can interpret

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

When intrusive thoughts feel like a war zone, the goal isn’t to defeat every thought—it’s to establish a ceasefire. Just as peace agreements are more likely to hold when neutral third parties monitor them, our mental peace is more sustainable when therapists, friends, journals, or mindfulness practices help us observe thoughts without escalating them.

Key Takeaways:

• Intrusive thoughts can feel like repeated violations of an internal ceasefire.
• A neutral third party helps monitor, interpret, and de-escalate mental conflict.
• Therapists, trusted friends, journaling, and meditation can serve as peacekeepers.
• The goal is not to eliminate thoughts, but to prevent them from triggering emotional retaliation.
• Healing comes from creating distance between the thought and the response.

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

Hope is often mistaken for a feeling of optimism, but for many people it looks much quieter: the decision to stay alive and keep going even when nothing feels certain. In this episode, we explore how hope is less about feeling inspired and more about choosing, day after day, to remain open to the possibility that life can change. Sometimes the most meaningful act is not thriving—it’s surviving.

Key Takeaways

• Hope is not a mood; it is a decision.
• You do not need certainty to keep going.
• Survival is a meaningful achievement.
• Choosing “one more day” is an act of courage.
• Staying alive preserves the possibility of connection, healing, and purpose.
• Quiet hope often sounds like: “I’m not done yet.”

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

Why do some men spend an afternoon talking about sports, parenting, and work, only to drive home listening to The National or James Blake and cry a little? In this episode, we explore the hidden loneliness of “good” conversations and why being around people isn’t always the same as feeling seen.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Why men can feel lonely even after spending time with friends
• The difference between proximity and true emotional intimacy
• Why tears often show up in the privacy of the car
• How masculine social norms keep conversations safe but shallow
• The grief of almost feeling connected
• Small ways to make friendships 10% more honest and meaningful
• Why authentic connection is one of the strongest protective factors against suicide 

Thrive With Leo Coaching: 

If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US: 

Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. 

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Outside the US:

International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.