Following the 3rd phase of the APSATS MPTM Model requires that you see your self as a survivor and a thriver. Carol the Coach is interviewing Gaelyn Rae Emerson who has created a rare and exciting new project for partners of sex addicts. Focused and fueled toward post-traumatic growth, Rediscovering Me is an “out of the box” kind of partners support group—one that’s perfect for women who are wondering “what’s next” on the journey of healing from sexual betrayal. Rediscovering Me is a refreshing opportunity for women who are sick and tired of resources that revolve around sex addiction, an endeavor that begins by asking the question, “Who Am I Beyond My Trauma?” Gaelyn is here today with two of her colleagues, Jacki Elsom and Esther Elmer. The three of them are eager to introduce this project to our Betrayal Trauma Radio listeners!

Coach Andrea has noticed that woman of color have specific challenges as partners in recovery and she wanted to talk about why the African American community may have different needs or expectations around problematic sexual behavior. She  and Carol the Coach will be talking about the need for research around her hypothesis.

Carol the Coach will be interviewed by Caroline Brown who wanted to learn more about partner betrayal from a partner perspective. She offered to interview Carol to help listeners know what they should look for when seeking help the "APSATS Way."

Frequently churches are the first responders to help couples facing infidelity and sex addiction. Often times they are ill equipped to know how to handle it from a partner sensitive approach. Hence, they do more damage to the partner and contribute to her pain. Listen as Marie Celano talks about how she is educating the church leaders to provide services to partners from a trauma perspective. This will be an inspiring conversation that may motivate you to set up services in your community.

Carol the Coach is interviewing Rebecca Maestas who is going to start two Help Her Heal groups for 14 weeks that will also includes a couple's component to teach the couple how to do the work to help her heal. This is a first for sex addicts and their partners and so we are excited to be finding out about this innovative program.

Today, Carol the Coach interviews Richard Butler who professes that he had to use a variety of tools and experiences to solidify his recovery. His recovery activities have included: Intensives, Couples Retreats, Counselling, Coaching, 12 Step Programs, and Mindfulness Tools. Listen as he shares his inspiring story of recovery, redemption and giving back!

Carol the Coach will be interviewing Shann Davis who leads a confidential women’s ministry group at Lakepointe Church in Rockwall, Texas called Sisters on a Journey for women who have been betrayed by their spouse’s sexual sin (affairs, both physical or emotional.)  Her goal  is to help empower the women through Jesus Christ and find their identity in Him.  Most women enter the class traumatized so they spend the first several weeks learning various tools for stabilization and self-care.  The group discovers through scripture who God says they are which helps begin to dispel the lies that partners come to believe as a result of the spouse’s deception and gaslighting.  By finding their identity in Christ, they give up the victim role and embrace the strength and power believers have in Christ.  They work on understanding they cannot fix anyone else and talk about boundaries and what those look like.  A turning point for the women is when they share their personal story and are affirmed by the others in the group.

Where I think I can serve your audience is talking about connection and attachment and why coming out and volunteering for Sidewalk Talk and getting more active connection can be part of recovery.  

 

Carol the Coach is going to interview marital therapist Traci Ruble who will be sharinf what she has learned about connection from listening to her clients. She will be talking specifically about her work with couples. She does alot of pre-emptive work talking about sex and arousal as part of building a relationship vision.  She continues to be amazed how few folks talk about their expectations for marriage or prior to launching in and find prevention can be really great medicine by getting clear on expectations.  Fun fact: She and her husband got so clear on expectations that they made a list of everything they hated about each other and shared it with one another before they got married so they could agree they were not signing up for a fixer-upper but an "I see you and know what I am getting myself into" marriage.

Carol the Coach will be interviewing Richa Badami who is a master at making partners feel safe after their truama responses and triggers. In her book “Coming Home to the Heart – Transforming Trauma into Infinite Possibilities for Healing” Richa shares her story of sexual abuse as a child growing up in India, and her powerful journey of recovery from it. Years later, as a recovered partner herself, she brings all of her personal experience, training and intimate knowledge, to help support and empower her clients, guiding them on a path of restoration after betrayal recovery.

The Super Bowl half time show is cultural gas-lighting. Dolly Parton posing for Playboy at 75 and everyone applauding her because "she's still got it" is cultural gaslighting. Listen as Carol the Coach interviews Lyschel Burket who will explain the ramifications of this phenomena.Cultural Gaslighting is the psychological manipulation in which our culture sows seeds of doubt in a targeted individual, situation, event, or moral thought. It makes the culture question their own memory, perception, or judgement, often times evoking a cognitive dissonance and other changes in personal value and worth such as low self esteem and self hate.Let's talk about what we can do to deal with this manipulation.