This is one of the most common—and most heartbreaking—questions I hear: Can a narcissist change? In this episode of You Are Not Crazy, I’m walking you through the reality behind that question.

The short answer? Maybe—but almost never.

Real change requires emotional accountability, humility, and deep psychological work… and most narcissists aren’t willing to do that. Not because they can’t—but because they don’t see the need. In this episode, we explore why narcissistic change is so rare, how survivors get stuck waiting for the version of their partner that never existed, and what it means to reclaim your clarity instead of waiting for someone else's transformation.

I also share a personal reflection on what helped me break free from the fantasy of potential and face the truth of what was in front of me.

You’ll learn:

• Why even accurate criticism feels unbearable to a narcissist
• What it actually takes to change—and why most won’t
• How the trauma bond keeps you holding on
• How to stop waiting and start healing

✨ This episode pairs with my new course Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse, designed to help you make sense of the chaos and see your relationship clearly. Find it at emotionalabusecoach.com.

Support the show

*Please Note: there is a long intro that explains my services. If you do not want to listen, just fast-forward 5 mins past. This intro will be changed in future recordings to be shorter. I am not paid to record this podcast and it is a free offering. Offering my work is the only way I can sustain the podcast*

Join the Patreon: https://patreon.com/Youarenotcrazy

*New Course*: Unhooked: Map the Cycle of Abuse in your Relationship

Website: Emotional Abuse Coach and high-conflictdivorcecoaching.com
Instagram: @emotionalabusecoach
Email: [email protected]

{Substack} Blog About Recovering from Abuse

{E-Book} How to Break Up with a Narcissist
{Course} Identify Signs of Abuse and Begin to Heal
{Free Resource} Canned Responses for Engaging with an Abusive Partner