Is your child stressed out, apprehensive or just feeling like life is too hard? Does anxiety or perfectionism cause them to feel they are not enough?

All hope is not lost! Three ways you can BUILD HOPE in your child's life - helping them to do well and feel well as they experience the power of hope.

• Research by Rick Snyder, Shane Lopez 
• Science of Hope TikTok video series by @insearchofbobcat
• Failure, anxiety, resilience
• Our children need to feel hopeful before they can feel they are enough
• What does the research say about hopeful people?
• What is hope, and why are our youth feeling hopeless?
• How to be a hope-builder
• Enough: Overcoming Anxiety, Perfectionism, & Self Loathing - a Happy Families article

Register for the Happy Families October Webinar - "Enough: Helping our children overcome anxiety, perfectionism & self-loathing"

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Part 2 of Justin speaking with author & associate Professor Katie Davis about her new book

Topics discussed in this episode - 

• Technology's Child by Katie Davis
• Justin asks Katie some rapid fire questions about her own family life
• Using technology to reinforce technology rules
• Finding a balance
• Video games aren't all bad
• The impact of social media

Further reading/watching:

• Screens And Our Boys - a Happy Families Article
• 5 Better Conversations To Have About Screens - a Happy Families Article
• Keeping your child focused on study and away from social media - a Happy Families Article
• Tweens, Teens & Screens - a Happy Families Webinar
• Digital Kids - a Happy Families Article

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You CAN be a "good-enough" digital parent!

Two questions every parent needs to ask when choosing apps or games for their child PLUS learn how to guide your child's relationship with screens in the best direction - guilt free! (Replay)

Topics discussed in this episode - 

• Technology's Child: Digital Media’s Role in the Ages and Stages of Growing Up - by Katie Davis
• What are the risks for children under 3?
• Why are screens so compelling to kids?
• Using screens as the default "fix" 
• Why screens are such an effective regulator (emotionally and behaviorally)
• Executive functioning and self-regulation
• 'Bottom-up' vs top-down' process of attention
• "Educational" apps - red flags
• Sign up for Katie's newsletter here

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Friendships are oxygen for girls! When a friendship sours, the mean girls arrive, or your daughter just can't find her tribe, life can be really hard. We share some powerful ideas to help your child navigate friend troubles - giving them options and building resilience.

Topics included in this episode -

• The difference between boy & girl play
• Boys use their bodies, girls use their words
• Optionality equals resilience 
• Autonomy, and feeling seen, heard and valued
• When should the school get involved?
• Avoidance reinforces anxiety
• Things you can you do to help your daughter
• Why Your Kids Need a Tribe - a Happy Families article
• Miss-Connection | 7 Day Connection Challenge – Happy Families

 

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Part 2 of a conversation on perfectionism with Professor Thomas Curran from the London School of Economics.

Rather than expecting perfection from your child try modelling making mistakes - embrace failure and setbacks when they arise. This (not perfectionism) is what leads to success!

Topics in this episode:

• Feeling that you are not enough
• The rise of perfectionism – and the harm it’s doing us all | Mental health | The Guardian
• Link between perfectionism and psychological distress
• Parental/societal expectations
• Increased competition and excessive pressure
• "Doing your best" - is this helpful?
• Self-sabotage, procrastination and avoidance of failure 
• What is success?
• The Perfection Trap Thomas Curran's new book

 

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Professor Thomas Curran is (among many impressive titles) a 'perfectionist expert'. He unpacks the 'what, why, where, who, and how' of perfectionism in part 1 of this compelling discussion with Dr Justin Coulson. Part 2 of this conversation can be found here.

Today's conversation covers:

• What is perfectionism?
• The link between mental health challenges and perfectionism
• Perfectionism in children - genetics or environmental?
• The 3 types of perfectionism
• Intergenerational transmission of perfectionistic tendencies
• The challenging cycle of self-defeat
• The Perfection Trap Thomas Curran's new book
• TEDMED - Our dangerous obsession with perfectionism is getting worse

 

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Raising teenagers can be hard even at the best of times. Trying to support our teens when they are struggling can feel like a dead-end street.

Dr Jo Prendergast shares the most important thing you can do that will make a difference for your teen when life just sucks.

Topics in this episode:

• When Life Sucks - Jo's new book
• Parents and self-regulation
• Emotions are contagious
• Deep breathing
• Being self-aware of your own triggers
• 'Ghosts in the nursery'
• Neurodiversity
• When does life suck for teens?
• 'The Three Rs of Great Parenting'
• Connected interactions

Learn more about The Teenage Brain in our FREE Happy Families Article.

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Navigating the complexities of tween and teen friendships can be challenging, especially in the age of social media. Here are some insights and tips to help your child run towards wonderful friendships rather than living in fear of exclusion.

Topics in this episode:

• Sleepovers
• Bulling and teasing
• Snapchat and social media
• Structured activities and finite time for teenage get-togethers
• Miss Connection: Why your teenage daughter "hates" you, expects the world, and needs to talk by Dr Justin Coulson
• What teenage girls worry about most
• Conversations to have with your child
• BMX - Be More Exceptional

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Every young person needs to have a close, significant adult to talk to when they experience challenges in life. Sadly, new research has revealed that far too many adolescents do not feel listened to and aren’t speaking to anyone when they’re worried.

Dr Katrina Lines (CEO of Act for Kids, and registered psychologist) shares some simple ways to connect with your child that will encourage them to share their problems with you.

Topics in this episode:

• Speaking to a professional
• Act for Kids Campaign "Get Comfy Switching ON by Switching OFF"  - all the research stats, tip sheets and an animation
• Incidental conversation or "small talk"
• Being present
• Connection 
• Pressures of school, friendships, social media
• 3 basic psychological needs
• Mental health issues - anxiety, depression, poor sleep
• Fear of parental criticism or dismissal, or not being listened to

 

Enough: Overcoming Anxiety, Perfectionism, & Self Loathing - a Happy Families article

Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Email us your questions and comments at [email protected]

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Is it just me...or are sleepovers a really bad idea?

In this episode:

• Pros and cons of sleepovers
• Social development
• Memories
• Safety concerns
• Peer pressure/exclusion
• Screens
• Prearming your kids
• #926 Who Tops the List of Child Sexual Abusers? – Happy Families
• Being on the Outer – Happy Families
• Are Sleepovers OK? – Happy Families

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