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We talk about loss and emotions in this week's episode of the Sober Friends Podcast.  Each week, my two girls go to a farm where they clean stables, wash and care for horses and then learn the different aspects of riding.

Their favorite horse was Holden, a 29 year old horse was very gentle and the logo for the farm.  My daughter Annelyse has significant anxiety and Holden made her feel safe.  Holden had Equine Cushing's Disease and early stages of dementia.  There is medicine for Cushing's, but Holden refused to take it.  The decision was made to put Holden to sleep.  We had a good-bye celebration last week, where everyone Holden touched came to share cupcakes, cake and a last spoiling of this special horse.  The next day, Holden crossed the rainbow.

This caused a well up in my emotions.  It especially started when Annelyse broke into tears asking why things she loved had to die.  For a parent, this is very difficult to experience.  It also reminded me of the emotions I felt when I first got sober.  How great sadness could overcome me without notice.

Steve and I also talked about the impact spirituality and God play.  Both of us have a challenging relationship with belief and are on our own spiritual journeys.  We talk about our personal beliefs in God, the afterlife and it's role in recovery.

Thank you for giving me an outlet for these emotions for this podcast and I hope you can connect with your own thoughts on difficult emotions and the vision of your own Higher Power.     

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