The Black Mother Wound Podcast

Ep 003: Will You Ever Be Good Enough for Love?


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Struggle love is defined as a relationship in which one partner does "the absolute most" for the other without reciprocity, aka "any DAMN thing in return."  Unfortunately, growing up with a toxic mother feels similar. As little girls, we bend over backward to "win" her heart while our hearts shatter.  

Too many Black women live as fragmented versions of themselves; it's no wonder why we hustle for the love and validation we have been conditioned to give others. In this episode, I share why this happens and what you can do about it. 

Takeaways: 

  • Love is a basic need that no human can be without. In toxic mother-daughter relationships, love isn't given freely; it has to be earned in most cases. The outcome is thousands of Black women endlessly hustling to prove their worth.
  • Until the injured woman heals the wounds of her childhood, she will never be capable of giving or receiving love authentically - not even to herself. 
  • Denying your needs as a way to receive love from another person only leads to frustration and Eispair.

Highlights: 

  • [00:01:03] Do you feel like you're not good enough to receive love without working for it? Here's why wounded women hustle for love.
  • [00:04:33] This is why trying to "earn" love will NEVER work 
  • [00:10:47] 3 personality traits of a wounded woman and how they show up in our careers and relationships. 
  • [00:21:38] How healing and doing the work shows up in your life.  
  • [00:25:16] This is what your inner little girl wants you to say to her.

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DISCLAIMER: I am not a licensed psychologist, medical doctor, or health care professional and my services do not replace the care of psychologists, doctors or other healthcare professionals. All opinions expressed here are my own. If you feel you are in any danger of harming yourself please call 911. 




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The Black Mother Wound PodcastBy Jennifer Arnise

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