It’s Not You, It’s Your Trauma - Trauma, PTSD, Abuse, Anxiety & Recovery - Joe Ryan

EP 0075 - Family System Revisited


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Family System Revisited builds off the Family Shame Episode (Episode 69), in which Joe elaborates on the pressures of family expectations and the toll it takes on a person in trying to fit into a family “system.”


When we're born, we're born into a system. We are thrown into an existing system and put into a slot. Family systems dictate how you are expected to act, appear in public and how you are supposed to handle actions and emotions from everyone within your inner circle. The pressure to act accordingly and do only what will get you positive attention becomes a burden you can only carry for so long. Eventually, the byproduct of all this shame, whether from someone else or your own self, as you feel you can’t live up to the standard set for you in this unhealthy system. What do you do to lose the feeling of worrying about what everyone wants, thinks, or expects from you? Learn what Joe had to do to teach himself to be ok with being able to survive and being seen in ways that weren't acceptable by his family system and move past all the guilt and shame he felt as a child for wanting things outside his place in the system.


In this Episode:

  • Learn to live a life outside of the role your family has set for you to live the life you want…one free of shame.

  • Getting in touch with our anger and emotions

  • Live within your own body…your own self.. without anxiety and fear.

  • Learn that you weren’t put on this earth to fill the holes of parents who can’t fill them in their own lives.

  • Integrate the parts of yourself in your new life that your family won't let you have

  • Build a relationship with yourself…Love is an Inside Job!

  • Learn to dismantle your family system's role to live and deal with the uncomfortable feelings of judgment and shame from your family system! Feel the relief and freedom that comes from releasing the bonds that have been placed on you by your family!


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