When you’re in a relationship with a narcissistic abuser, you’re often taught—subtly and systematically—that you’re never enough. No matter how hard you try or how well you perform, the bar keeps moving. The goalposts shift. And you’re left running harder, faster, and emptier.

In this episode, we explore the exhausting cycle of performance that narcissistic abuse creates—and how to shift from constantly doing more to finally being more.

We unpack:

• How narcissists condition you to believe your worth is tied to performance
• Why the love-bombing stage sets the trap for a lifetime of over-functioning
• The emotional and physical toll of chasing validation that never comes
• What it means to recognize the pattern—and why the target was never meant to be reached
• How to shift from external approval to internal truth
• Why being more—not doing more—is the path to healing and self-worth

This episode is for anyone who’s ever felt like they were sprinting toward a finish line that keeps disappearing. If you’ve been told—directly or covertly—that you’re not enough, this conversation will help you name the lie and reclaim your value.

Download the episode today.

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Follow our work beyond the podcast: We publish essays and insights on Medium through our Moving Forward with Hope publication, and you can also find additional content and community updates on our Substack. Join us there to go deeper, connect with others, and support the movement.

See also Episode 89, “The Silent Brotherhood,” for deeper insight into male loyalty codes, and highlight Lynn’s book Master Manipulators—now on Audible—for a full breakdown of covert narcissistic tactics.🎧 To hear this full episode, go to waketheelephant.gumroad.com/l/hiddenloyalty

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