Woah. I never learned what I learned today in all my 20 yrs of study. Jason and I concurred on many items and issues regarding the importance of learning to feel. That conflict is good for development, part of life, that it's essential to learn how to better communicate AND that there is no perfect conflict free relationship out there. We agree that it's important to resolve conflict as quickly as possible WHILE honoring each other's 'animal'. We agreed with what he calls a 'Stand for 3' for self, other and the relationship. We agree that we keep repairing the relationship until we're back to 'zero'... where we feel good and are connected again. Yet HERE is where he blew my mind (oh, in addition to his epic spoken word at the end of the podcast xox)... when two people are triggered he said we can actually resolve it faster when in the presence of each other... when keeping eye contact (not freaky non stop, but in general), by breathing , even by moving closer (YIKES!) and by owning it. Here's my part. I'm being a jerk. I can see it shut you down. I'm sorry..... this makes his wife soften and they return to 'zero' much faster. Whoa. I watched my parents for decades LEAVE and not return for the whole month at the lake with us in tow. My nervous system is freaked at his suggestion YET I also never stop growing and I'm willing to be wrong, be delighted, be open and evolve. So I shall keep you posted people! In the mean time listen up and grab his book, Getting to Zero: How to Work Through Conflict in Your High Stakes Relationships. Love you madly, Allana xoxo ---------------------------------

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