“We are all worthy of grieving, we are all deserving of grieving, that grieving is part of life and that it is okay to grieve."

In this episode of Grief'd Up, host Rebecca Feinglos welcomes Ana Marcela Rodríguez, a licensed marriage and family therapist who's transforming mental health care for the Hispanic community in North Texas. Ana Marcela shares how early losses shaped her calling to therapy and why culturally competent care matters when we're at our most vulnerable.

Ana Marcela's grief journey began at 11 when her grandmother Ana Maria, died unexpectedly in a car accident. Just two years later, her parents' divorce brought another wave of loss, but it also led her father to do something revolutionary for their culture and time: he took her to therapy. That experience changed everything, sparking Ana Marcela's passion for psychology and setting her on a path to become the therapist she once needed.

When Ana Marcela moved to the U.S. and sought therapy herself, she couldn't find a provider who truly understood her Mexican culture. That gap inspired her to build Therapy Works Counseling.

Rebecca and Ana Marcela dive deep into the layered grief of immigration, like losing not just your country, but your food, language, routines, and sometimes decades without seeing family. Ana Marcela powerfully reminds us that grief shows up in every unmet expectation, every transition, every moment we disappoint others to stay true to ourselves. She shares her own journey balancing Mexican family expectations with being a working mother and business owner, choosing authenticity over approval.

This conversation explores how grief follows immigrants across borders and through generations, why seeking community defeats the isolation that grief creates, and how choosing yourself, even when you fail, leads to your most authentic life. 

Connect with Ana Marcela:

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 "My first thought was, this is really bad timing because we had a difficult away game."

In this episode of Grief'd Up, host Rebecca Feinglos welcomes Hugo Scheckter, founder of the Player Care Group, for a conversation that moves between professional football clubs and deeply personal loss. Hugo shares his journey from coaching to pioneering player welfare in Premier League soccer, and how losing his sister Ila in 2019 changed his relationship with work, grief, and what truly matters.

Hugo opens up about that first devastating phone call and his unexpected reaction: worrying about inconveniencing his employer. This moment sparked a reckoning about the all-consuming nature of elite sports and led him to eventually leave his role at West Ham to start his own company. Five years later, he's still grappling with that initial response, even as he's built a career helping organizations better support their athletes during life's hardest moments.

Rebecca and Hugo dive into the uncomfortable phenomenon that Hugo calls "grief farming" in sports media: the exploitation of athletes' personal tragedies for clicks and engagement. From coaches being asked about dead children after championship wins, to fans wearing deceased family members' names on jerseys, they explore where the line falls between genuine support and performative sadness. Hugo argues that grief belongs to the griever, and media coverage should follow their lead rather than chase viral moments.

The conversation also reveals the hidden pressures facing professional athletes: players who skip their children's births to avoid losing their starting position, goalkeepers whose time off for bereavement depends on the quality of their replacement, and the constant fear that being "out" means being forgotten. Hugo explains how elite sports create a reality where normal grief processes become nearly impossible, with consequences that may surface only years later when careers end and priorities shift.

Join Rebecca and Hugo as they challenge assumptions about grief in the public eye, examine what athletes sacrifice beyond their physical health, and consider how we can all show up better for people navigating loss, whether they're millionaires or not.

Link to Shane Battier episode: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/griefd-up/id1759459228?i=1000672497190

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"When somebody dies, the single thing that enables us to survive is the love and support of others."

In this episode of Grief'd Up, host Rebecca Feinglos welcomes Julia Samuel, one of the world's most influential voices in grief support. Julia is a psychotherapist with over 30 years of experience, founder patron of Child Bereavement UK, and author of Grief Works, This Too Shall Pass, and Every Family Has a Story. She's also created the Grief Works app and co-hosts the Therapy Works podcast with her daughters.

Julia opens up about growing up in a family where loss was everywhere but never discussed. Her mother Pauline lost her brother in World War II, her sister, and her father by age 25, yet none of this was ever talked about. When Pauline finally spoke about her brother's death 40 years later, it was as if it had happened yesterday—completely unprocessed trauma.

At 29, Julia walked into her first bereavement support visit and knew she'd found her calling. She went on to spend 25 years at St. Mary's Hospital supporting families when babies and children die, becoming the first person to hold that role.

Rebecca and Julia explore how healthcare systems often fail grieving families. Julia shares what compassionate death support should look like: healthcare practitioners should know the person's name, read their notes, listen first, and remember that families will replay your words for the rest of their lives. The window between diagnosis and death is tiny; healthcare providers must create space for acts of love and help families avoid regrets. The conversation turns to COVID-era losses and the devastating impact of not being able to properly mourn. 

Join Rebecca and Julia as they challenge how we talk about death in families and healthcare systems, offer hope to those who missed traditional mourning during COVID, explore the art of listening, the most essential tool in supporting the grieving, and hear Rebecca’s special story about Princess Diana and her mother.

We're honored to offer Grief'd Up listeners an exclusive 10% discount on the Grief Works app. Download it today and use our special promo code GWGL10.

Resources mentioned in this episode:

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"I think all of our healing starts in learning to find spaces that we can safely speak about our stories."

In this episode of Grief'd Up, host Rebecca Feinglos welcomes Chanelle Jefferson, a contemporary artist, who's revolutionizing how we process grief through her stunning visual art. Chanelle shares her journey from childhood trauma to creating The Grief Project: an initiative that channels people's grief stories into beautiful paintings using blind contour methods and chalk on canvas.

Growing up in rural Nova Scotia, witnessing domestic abuse, Chanelle didn't recognize her own grief until later, when she arrived at university in Montreal at age 20. The Grief Project began organically when she painted in a friend's garden after that friend's sister died. The sister had lovingly tended that land, and Chanelle felt compelled to capture it on canvas. 

Chanelle decided to do more with this idea last year, and decided to invite people to share grief stories with her so she could paint them. When she opened submissions expecting just a few stories, 150 people responded— all seeking a new way to honor their grief.

Throughout the conversation, Chanelle emphasizes that all forms of grief deserve space. She shares how people often apologize for their stories, feeling they're "not important enough" compared to others who've experienced death. The episode includes a beautiful moment where Rebecca and Chanelle practice blind contour drawing together, the meditation technique Chanelle uses for all her paintings, where you draw without looking at the paper as a way to truly see someone.

Join Rebecca and Chanelle as they discuss building intuition, the power of being seen and heard in grief, and how vulnerability itself can be transformative. Plus, hear about Maggie, the dog Chanelle found on Kijiji, who saved her life by getting her outside and teaching her to rest.

Special Opportunity for the Grief'd Up Community:

Chanelle is partnering with Grief'd Up to bring The Grief Project directly to our community. If you'd like to submit your grief story for consideration, visit the submission form linked below. Chanelle and Rebecca will read every single story!

Learn more about The Grief Project collaboration: https://www.chanellejefferson.com/thegriefproject-grieveleave

Submit your grief story: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLScifYM6llrRgXUozLQZ7lAnXuytOl1xY3JLEBSL2tXWOWZuuw/viewform?usp=header

Links & Resources:

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"What would it look like if this year we were all just a little more open and honest about our grief over the holidays? And what if we stopped trying to prove how great things are or how perfect our holiday season looks and let our guards down a little bit?"

In this solo episode of Grief'd Up, host Rebecca Feinglos explores the pressure to perform perfection during the holidays when you're grieving. She shares the story of opening her mailbox to find something odd: a holiday card she sent four years ago, returned to sender. The card shows Rebecca and her dogs in matching Hanukkah pajamas, and on the back, she wrote the truth about her year: leaving a destructive relationship, starting Grieve Leave, cherishing time with her Nana before she died. It was the first time Rebecca stopped using the holidays to prove everything was fine.

Before that 2021 card, Rebecca spent years crying before holiday photo shoots with her ex-husband, whispering unkind words to each other while the camera clicked, then celebrating how great the pictures turned out. She used holiday cards and social media posts as proof points that her marriage was working when it absolutely wasn't. Proving she was okay mattered more than actually feeling okay.

Rebecca explores what can happen when we choose to stop performing during the holidays. She talks about holding joy and grief at the same time, choosing who gets the real answer when they ask how you're doing, and dealing with the 1 AM social media spiral when everyone else's holidays look perfect. 

Join Rebecca as she challenges the idea that we need to hide our grief during the holidays and offers permission to show up authentically.

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 "The knee jerk reaction is ‘you’re not alone.’ But the reality is that you feel really f***ing alone!"

In this episode of Grief'd Up, host Rebecca Feinglos welcomes Andrea Girón-Mathern and Rebecca Luttrell, the dynamic duo behind the All the Grief podcast. These two Colorado-based women prove that some of the most powerful friendships are forged through shared experiences of loss– what we in the Grieve Leave community call "grief chemistry."

Andrea is a social scientist and research expert specializing in belonging and community-based research. Rebecca Luttrell is a licensed professional clinical counselor and psychotherapist trained at Naropa University's Buddhist-inspired graduate program. When Andrea's father died during the pandemic, Rebecca became one of the few people who truly understood her grief. Their deepening friendship became the foundation for creating All the Grief podcast, where they normalize conversations about death, mortality, and every kind of loss.

The conversation explores the concept of "friend soulmates,” those rare people who just get you, grief and all. Andrea and Rebecca share how their podcast evolved from just the two of them talking into a platform featuring diverse guests and grief stories. They discuss why grief support shouldn't only live in therapists' offices, the importance of learning to "hold space" for others, and why telling someone "you're not alone" can sometimes feel invalidating when they're feeling desperately lonely.

The duo opens up about their vision for creating grief retreats at Andrea's mountain cabin, offering intimate spaces for small groups to process loss together in nature. They passionately advocate for expanding our definition of grief beyond death, including job loss, friendship endings, estrangement, infertility struggles, and even the collective grief of our current chaotic times. 

Join Rebecca and the All the Grief podcast co-hosts, Andrea Girón-Mathern and Rebecca Luttrell, as they explore grief chemistry, the power of peer support, and why normalizing all types of grief has never been more urgent.

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"Grief is not a journey. It is a language. The goal is not finishing. It's becoming fluent."

In this episode of Grief'd Up, host Rebecca Feinglos sits down with John Onwuchekwa, one of the most prominent voices in the grief space and creator of the We Go On Tour. John shares his journey from a child with a severe stutter to a pastor, author, and grief advocate whose work has touched millions.

After losing his brother Sam in 2015 at just 32 years old, John discovered that the most spiritual thing he could do wasn't to help others put their lives together, it was to let his own fall apart. His friends confronted him with words that changed everything: "You trying to help people put their lives back together is a type of anesthesia that has numbed your heart to the fact that yours is falling apart." That confrontation in March 2016 profoundly changed his life and set him on a new path.

John opens up about turning 40 and receiving unexpected diagnoses, Hashimoto's thyroid disease, and ADHD. He shares how these health challenges became another form of grief to process, even as they led to feeling better than ever at 41.

Rebecca and John explore why grief isn't a tunnel with light at the end, but rather a cave we must sit in together. John challenges the harmful metaphor of grief as a journey with a finish line, offering instead the idea that grief is a language we must learn to speak fluently.

Join Rebecca and John as they discuss why cemeteries are actually gardens, how grief births the most incredible friendships, and why approaching grief like a sculptor approaching a rock, rather than a passerby trying to get around it, allows us to chip away and uncover something beautiful inside.

Connect with John:

Book: Grief is a Language: Finding the Right Words When There Are None (coming soon)

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"Can a person you're getting to know sit with your pain and hold it alongside you? Can they listen and be present for whatever grief you're sharing with them, without trying to fix it or ignoring it? Can they just let your grief be? Can just be in the room with you?"

In this solo episode of Grief'd Up, host Rebecca Feinglos gets vulnerable about one of her favorite topics: dating while grieving. Rebecca shares hard-won wisdom from four years of post-divorce dating as someone who lost both parents, exploring the delicate balance between authenticity and not "killing the vibe" on a first date.

Rebecca opens up about the evolution of grief disclosure in her dating life, from formal, sit-down conversations in college to simply linking her social media in dating profiles so potential partners could learn about her loss on their own time. She discusses the relief of finding partners who could "hold" her grief without trying to fix it, and why she found herself gravitating toward slightly older partners who had more life experience with loss.

The conversation dives into common dating pitfalls for grievers: expecting a partner to save you from your sadness, assuming shared grief automatically equals compatibility, and wrestling with weird milestones like when to bring someone to the cemetery. Rebecca challenges listeners to trust their gut, find partners brave enough to ask questions about their loss, and remember that the right person won't be scared of their grief. 

Join Rebecca as she offers big sister advice on navigating new relationships when loss is part of your story.

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“I think you have to keep one foot solidly in the camp of, this is a replication echo. It is not actually a digital version of the person that I loved."

In this episode of Grief'd Up, host Rebecca Feinglos welcomes her best friend, Brooke Hartley Moy, CEO of Infactory and seasoned tech leader, to explore the surprising and  complex intersections of artificial intelligence and grief. The conversation ventures into uncharted grief support territory as they examine how AI is changing, and will continue to change, how we remember, memorialize, and interact with the people we've lost.

Rebecca and Brooke discuss the ethical complexities of creating AI avatars of the dead, drawing parallels between modern technology and historical rituals like mummification and photography. They explore uncomfortable questions: Would Rebecca want an AI version of her late father? What happens when one family member wants to preserve a loved one's memory through AI, but another finds it disturbing?

The conversation touches on the psychology of memory, the dangers of AI hallucinations in grief contexts, and how this technology could either help people process loss or trap them in an artificial past. Rebecca and Brooke also share personal moments from their 20+ year friendship, including the grief they still carry about missing a Kelly Clarkson concert in high school (thanks to Rebecca getting grounded), and how they've supported each other through breakups, deaths, and life transitions.

Join Rebecca and Brooke as they navigate the ethical, emotional, and technological frontiers of grief in the age of AI.

Connect with Brooke:

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"Shame is what killed my brother…and I refuse to let shame take anything away from us anymore.”

In this episode of Grief'd Up, host Rebecca Feinglos welcomes Nina Rodriguez, grief guide, educator, podcaster, and founder of Grief and Light. Nina shares her experience of the death of her little brother and only sibling, Yosef, at 32 to fentanyl poisoning. His death transformed her into a passionate advocate for grief support and stigmatized loss.

Nina was celebrating Yosef’s 32nd birthday on an ordinary Wednesday when everything changed. For a year and a half, Nina told people her brother died of a heart attack, unable to bear the weight of judgment and shame surrounding addiction and overdose. But standing at the University of Miami, preparing to speak publicly about her loss, something shifted. She realized that shame had already taken too much, and she refused to let it take anything more.

This conversation explores the unique grief of sibling loss and why siblings are often called the forgotten mourners. Nina and Rebecca discuss how losing a sibling means losing not just your person, but your future as you imagined it: no nieces or nephews, no shared experience of burying parents, the family branch ending with you. They also dive into the layers within sibling loss itself: losing a sibling as a child versus an adult, losing an only sibling, the strange relationship siblings have, and why bereaved siblings feel they must constantly qualify their loss as valid.

Nina speaks to the importance of energetic hygiene when working in the grief space, the beauty of meeting people in their most vulnerable and raw selves, and why she still uses the present tense when talking about her brother. 

Join Rebecca and Nina as they challenge the shame surrounding stigmatized loss, explore how siblings navigate being the forgotten mourners, and celebrate the ways we can maintain continuing bonds with those we love, even when they're no longer physically here.

Resources:

For more on sibling grief, listen to Rebecca's conversation with Annie Sklaver-Orenstein: https://www.grieveleave.com/podcasts/grief-d-up/episodes/2148864342

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