Healing My Parts: Real Talk on Dissociative Identity Disorder and Complex Trauma

This episode is filled with so much heart and wisdom. Amanda Ball discovered they were a system later in life and that discovery turned everything upside down. Amanda shares her story of how she discovered she was a system We dive into an authentic conversation that covers topics from loss, deep grief, and real stigma to aphantasia, preventing switching, relationships and much more. We recognize that not everyone can access therapy and even those who can are often on long waitlists. We discussed many accessible resources for healing that can be found free online.

You can find Amanda on Instagram. See below for their full bio!

Resources:

The Dissociative Disorders Alliance

An Infinite Mind

Beauty After Bruises

Theresa https://www.dis-sos.com/about-us/

Carolyn Spring

The CTAD Clinic Website

Dr Mike Lloyd

CTAD Clinic YouTube Channel

Adrienne & Co (Formerly Known as Dr. Adrian Fletcher)

Dr Arielle Schwartz

BIO: Amanda Ball (She/He/They) lives with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) and collectively she and other selves are known as the ETERNITY System. 

Amanda had a long career and held senior posts in the Food, Drink and Agricultural industry, mainly in Strategy, Planning, Training, Marketing and Communication roles and continue to champion British Food. Whilst no longer able to pursue a career, they continue to use their skills through mentoring and volunteering work and are a future trustee of a soon to be registered charity, ‘The Dissociative Disorders Alliance’.  Their professional values are ‘Focus, Clarity, Direction’.

They strive to make the complexities of living with DID accessible to others, by sharing everyday experiences through advocacy work. Notable highlights to date include planning and executing the launch of ‘The Girls Within’ a book written by debut author and retired therapist Gill Frost. The book launch provided a springboard for a live Webinar, ‘Dissociative Identity Disorder, The Hidden Condition’ and a follow up Webcast ‘Demystifying Dissociative Identity Disorder’. The recordings, hosted on Karnac Books YouTube channel, have had over 16K views to date.

They also undertake public speaking and media work and have appeared as guests on BBC Radio 2 Jeremy Vine Show as well as other BBC regional stations, sharing their lived experience of DID.

With their symptoms and subsequent diagnosis being relatively recently (2016), life and their identity until then was focused almost entirely on work. As a result, they are still finding their way when it comes to rest and play, however their determination and curiosity gained through work and life experience, are proving helpful characteristics in their journey through therapy.

Running has become an essential part of everyday life in the Cotswolds, not just through the exercise itself but by providing social connections being a member of a local club.  They have also started to keep a growing collection of house plants alive!

Podcast Legal Disclaimer

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between the listener and the host. Always seek the guidance of a qualified mental health professional with any questions you may have regarding your mental health or medical condition. If you are in crisis or in need of immediate support, please contact a licensed mental health provider or emergency services in your area.

Episode 15 welcomes Melissa Parker, LMHC, (they/them), a plural therapist who has expertise in working with clients who have PTSD, DID, OSDD and who live with other trauma related effects. We took a deep dive into the challenges systems face when seeking care and finding resources. Sharing anecdotes from personal and professional experiences, we connect around the need for more compassion, love, openminded perspectives and a willingness to truly individualize care. Part of willingness to treat the individual involves professionals removing hard and fast barriers such as “a diagnosis of DID is an automatic exclusion to psychedelic assisted treatment.” As you will hear, psychedelics do have a place in treatment and can be profoundly helpful for some. Given the propensity for great harm, caution also needs to be exercised. Melissa takes us through how to explore the possibility while offering concrete suggestions for safety.

Many systems will feel both validated and inspired by this conversation, while professionals may glean a deeper understanding around the impact of language, mindset and perspectives when delivering care to systems.

Professional Bio:

Melissa enjoys working with older adolescents and adults who live with the effects of complex trauma. Melissa’s work and perspectives are rooted in anti-oppression practice, and the lenses of trauma-informed developmental, humanist, and transpersonal psychology. They take an integrative approach to therapy and utilize whole-person modalities such as EMDR, humanistic talk therapy, ketamine-assisted psychotherapy (KAP), and sensory/somatic-based interventions. Melissa also offers psychedelic integration therapy.

Melissa welcomes the opportunity to connect with individuals from all walks of life and seeks to work from a place of cultural humility and respect. They hold a special interest in providing support and therapy to mental health professionals who have lived experience with mental health concerns, trauma, and dissociation. They also have an interest and experience in supporting individuals who seek to integrate profound spiritual experiences into daily life.

In addition to their clinical work, Melissa draws on their experience as a trauma survivor and clinical professional living with PTSD and DID, to provide anti-ableism-based training, supervision, and consultation to therapists who are interested in deepening their work with clients who live with dissociation

RESOURCES

Melissa Parker LMHC

MAPS

Dance Safe Fentanyl Test Strips

Melissa Parker on Braving The Way Podcast

Podcast Legal Disclaimer

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between the listener and the host. Always seek the guidance of a qualified mental health professional with any questions you may have regarding your mental health or medical condition. If you are in crisis or in need of immediate support, please contact a licensed mental health provider or emergency services in your area.

Raw, poignant and real. In discussing all things system accountability, Adrienne & Co lets us into their lives and what it’s been like navigating betrayals, fusions, and integration while simultaneously beginning a new life with their soulmate who is also a system. Adrienne & Co describes how they showing up for all parts of the system with love and compassion. They share where they’ve been and why they’ve taken a step back from advocacy.

This episode is full of important takeaways. Whether you’re a system or a provider who treats systems, this rich conversation is filled with examples of the work it takes for a system of parts to truly work together. Whether life is at a high or low point or anywhere in between, Adrienne & Co shows us all how to show up with a formidable combination of strength, vulnerability and compassion that ultimately moves healing forward.

We hope you are as moved and inspired as we are by this conversation.

Where to find Adrienne & Co

Adrienne & Co on Instagram

Adrienne & Co's Website

Mentorship Group

Psychology Today Blog

Thanks for listening to Healing My Parts Substack! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support our work.

Podcast Legal Disclaimer

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between the listener and the host. Always seek the guidance of a qualified mental health professional with any questions you may have regarding your mental health or medical condition. If you are in crisis or in need of immediate support, please contact a licensed mental health provider or emergency services in your area.

Many of you are already fans of today’s guest, Dr. Mike Lloyd, who is a Consultant Clinical Psychologist specializing in complex trauma and dissociative disorders and Director of the CTAD Clinic and Cheshire Psychology in the UK. He is also the creator of the popular CTAD Clinic YouTube Channel where you’ll find his engaging videos break down complex concepts related to living with and treating DID & OSDD into easy to understand language and captivating visuals.

Dr. Mike is a member of the European Society for Trauma and Dissociation (ESTD), having previously been on the ESTD Board and also a UK contact person. Dr. Mike also teaches on the ESTD four day foundation course ("Assessment and Treatment of Dissociative Disorders") and Liverpool University's Clinical Doctorate course. He is a lifetime member of First Person Plural, the UK's most prominent expert-by-experience organization for Dissociative Identity Disorder. He has presented in the UK, Europe and Canada. He is renovating a house in Malpas in preparation for a new clinic and rescues cats with the RSPCA (wait until you hear how many!)

This episode is chock full of wisdom, passion, and compassion. Dr. Mike gives us a taste of his respectful therapeutic style underscoring the importance of the treatment environment and therapeutic alliance in collaboratively charting a course to healing. A delightful surprise for those who living with dissociative identities (DI), Dr Mike gives us a sneak peak into the mind of someone who is not multiple. Meanwhile providers and supporters gain a better understanding of what it’s like inside the mind of someone living with DI. From strategies to resources, to understanding key concepts to hope and inspiration for those diagnosed later in life, there is truly something here for everyone. We hope you enjoy this conversation as much as we did!

Resources mentioned in the show:

CTAD Clinic Videos

YouTube: A Visual Understanding of How Alters/Parts are Formed

YouTube: Denial & Recognition Later in Life

YouTube: Action Systems and Their Influence

YouTube: Introduction to Structural Dissociation

YouTube: Why is my Internal Communication Not Working

YouTube: Managing Employment, Alters & DID

YouTube: Integration in DID & OSDD -hint-it’s not necessarily final fusion

YouTube: Integration & Fusion Part 2- understanding the differences

Marcella Netflix Series

CTAD Clinic Trainings and Resources:

CTAD Clinic

CTAD Clinic Trainings

CTAD Clinic Resources to Explore

More Resources:

First Person Plural

Carolyn Spring

Blue Knot Foundation

European Society for Trauma and Dissociation

International Society for the Study of Trauma and Dissociation

Podcast Legal Disclaimer

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between the listener and the host. Always seek the guidance of a qualified mental health professional with any questions you may have regarding your mental health or medical condition. If you are in crisis or in need of immediate support, please contact a licensed mental health provider or emergency services in your area.

Jaime lives in Central Florida where she works as a district Pre-K special education resource teacher. She also works part-time as an in-home early interventionist for special needs children aged birth to three.

In 2005, she was diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) resulting from childhood trauma. Jaime searched for support only to find there were very limited resources available. Her efforts to find support for herself led her to seek out other survivors living with the disorder.

As she found others living with DID, she witnessed firsthand the challenges they shared and decided to shift her focus to help others, like herself, living with DID. In July of 2007, she started one of the only peer-led DID support groups in the country, which led to the creation of An Infinite Mind in January of 2008.

Her passion comes from the hope that people with DID can find the support and resources they need and will no longer fear the stigma surrounding the disorder.

In this episode Jaime shares her journey of founding An Infinite Mind and all it has to offer. Jaime opens up about her own personal journey with Dissociative Identities, from diagnosis through treatment to the collaborative system she enjoys today. A truly strength’s based view, this episode will inspire and motivate you, whether you have Dissociative Identities yourself or you are a provider who treats people with DI. It’s filled with practical ideas, tips, relatable experiences, passion and compassion.

AIM Resource Links:

An Infinite Mind

AIM's Healing Together Conference

AIM's Speaker Series

Resources for Consultation for Therapists

Institute for Creative Mindfulness Resources

ICM EMDR Consultation Be sure to check out the many trainings they offer in EMDR and Dissociation.

Consultation with Katie Keech LMFT

Consultation with Adrienne & Co (Formerly Dr. Adrian Fletcher

Consultation with Dr. Mike Lloyd CTAD Clinic UK

The Refractory Think Tank for Plural Providers, Researchers, Coaches

Resources for Systems

Trailblazing The Way Community Mentorship Program

System Speaks Community

A Couple of Multiples

Multiplied By One

Beauty After Bruises

The Plural Association

Power To The Plurals

Dr Jamie Marich

Katie Keech LMFT

Blue Knot Foundation

The Crisses

Kinhost

Podcast Legal Disclaimer

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between the listener and the host. Always seek the guidance of a qualified mental health professional with any questions you may have regarding your mental health or medical condition. If you are in crisis or in need of immediate support, please contact a licensed mental health provider or emergency services in your area.

Listen in as Jamie+ talks candidly about the topics of disclosure, functional multiplicity, how parts work together, the nuances of lived experience, sexuality, and the judgement that exists within the mental health field. They also share insights about their brand new, soon to be released memoir, You Lied To Me About God.

Resources

You Lied To Me About God: A Memoir

Dissociation Made Simple

Redefine Therapy

Institute for Creative Mindfulness

Navigating Self-Disclosure Course

Dr Jamie on Instagram

Dr Jamie on TikTok

Kay Redfield Jamison's Books

Podcast Legal Disclaimer

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between the listener and the host. Always seek the guidance of a qualified mental health professional with any questions you may have regarding your mental health or medical condition. If you are in crisis or in need of immediate support, please contact a licensed mental health provider or emergency services in your area.

Melz opens up, giving us an authentic view of their life as a system. Melz takes us through how they first discovered they were a system at the age of 13, on through the ups and downs of therapy, to learning to navigate co-occurring mental health issues and ultimately settling into thriving in functional multiplicity and so much more. Melz shares their story along with insights, tips, and resources. Their tenacity, resilience, compassion and humor will inspire and motivate you whether you are a system yourself, a supporter or a provider.

Find and follow Melz at @many_melz

Resources:

A Couple of Multiples

System Speaks Community

The Gianu System

Indigo & Dissociation

neuroqueer_therapist Katie Keech

Healing Together Conference

The Plural Association

Dr Jamie Marich

The Institute for Creative Mindfulness

Brushstrokes Imagination

Crisses

Kinhost

Multiplicity & Me

CTAD Clinic

The Blue Knot Foundation

Beauty after Bruises

Podcast Legal Disclaimer

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between the listener and the host. Always seek the guidance of a qualified mental health professional with any questions you may have regarding your mental health or medical condition. If you are in crisis or in need of immediate support, please contact a licensed mental health provider or emergency services in your area.

While this episode may seem to be geared only to providers, the content can also be helpful in building awareness and providing validation to those living as systems or for those who think they may be systems.

The first portion of the episode is dedicated to formal assessment instruments. Because, depending on which part(s) is forward, formal instruments can still miss the presence of dissociative identities, the second portion of this episode delves into practical tips and strategies for clinicians to use to assess for DID & OSDD1 throughout therapy sessions.

Links to Formal Instruments:

Dissociative Experiences Scale II (DES II)

Multidimensional Inventory of Dissociation (MID)

Structured Clinical Interview for DSM Dissociative Disorders (SCID-D)

Dissociative Disorders Interview Schedule (DDIS)

YouTube Episode referenced in episode

Discussion by Multiplicity & Me's Expert Checklist be sure to check their show notes for links to scholarly articles

Our Response to McLean Debacle for those who would like to delve into the dangers of reckless accusations of false DID. This occurred when a McLean psychologist perpetrated harm by inappropriately used creator content from Instagram and TikTok and accused them of not having DID, when in fact they were all professionally diagnosed. This article contains links to scholarly articles as well as up to date considerations for how we view multiplicity.

Resources

Organizations:

An Infinite Mind 

ISSTD

Books:

* Dissociation Made Simple Dr Jamie Marich

* Finding Solid Ground Dr Bethany Brand

* Coping with Trauma Related Dissociation Kathy Steele et al Take what works, leave what doesn’t. Know there are legitimate concerns regarding the Structural Dissociation model.

Documentary

* Petals of a Rose

Instagram

* @petalsofarose_themovie

* @drafletcher

* @healingmyparts

* @indigo.and.dissociation

* @mindful_therapy_practice

* @beautyafterbruises

* @thepluralassociation

* @gianusystem

* @katiekmft

TikTok

·        @neuroqueer_therapist Katie Keech, LMFT

·        @traumatherapistrants Dr. Jamie Marich

Podcasts & Blogs (by therapists w/ &w/o lived experience)

·        Braving the Way with Dr. Fletch (LE)

·        A Couple of Multiples (podcast & website, LE)

·        Healing My Parts (podcast & Substack, LE) 

·        How We Can Heal with Lisa Danylchuk (wo)

·        Therapy Chat Podcast with Laura Reagan (wo)

YouTube Channels:

·        CTAD Clinic  

·        Multiplicity & Me 

·        The Rings System

Podcast Legal Disclaimer

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between the listener and the host. Always seek the guidance of a qualified mental health professional with any questions you may have regarding your mental health or medical condition. If you are in crisis or in need of immediate support, please contact a licensed mental health provider or emergency services in your area.

Episode 8 welcomes the Gianu System & their Hubs, the SplenDID Supporter to the podcast. The Gianu System & their Hubs gave an absolutely stellar talk at the Healing Together this past February, chock full of information you can’t find anywhere else.

From finding out they were a system to their Hubs building relationships with their different alters to navigating intimacy, we cover it all here. Whether you are questioning, newly diagnosed, have been diagnosed for ages, are a supporter or friend of a system or a treatment provider, this episode has something for you.

There is so much information in this episode that we surely wish we had had access to. We are honored to have been able to host this conversation and bring you information to assist you in navigating the terrain of your own unique journey.

We had so much fun talking with the Gianu System & their Hubs and cannot wait to have them back for an engaging conversation on modalities and healing! So be sure to stay tuned for that!

Links

They’re an author so be sure to Check out their incredible books here!

Follow them on Instagram: Gianu System SplenDID Supporter

Follow them on TikTok Gianu System

Podcast Legal Disclaimer

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between the listener and the host. Always seek the guidance of a qualified mental health professional with any questions you may have regarding your mental health or medical condition. If you are in crisis or in need of immediate support, please contact a licensed mental health provider or emergency services in your area.

Episode 7 Those who navigate the intersection of DID and eating disorders face unique challenges in finding care for themselves. It is challenging enough to find care for one or the other, never mind when they coexist! Given that over 90% of people with eating disorders have a trauma history and up to 40% of people with DID suffer from eating disorders, we are also not talking about a small number of people.

In today’s episode, we chat with Angela Kaloudis, a compassionate, talented therapist who specializes in treating folx with DID/OSDD and eating disorders. She takes us through how she came to this specialty area, what she wishes she knew earlier, the challenges she regularly runs into and what she wishes other therapists knew, including red flags for dissociation that often get missed. Whether you are someone living with the condition or a therapist working with this population, you’ll find valuable nuggets in all that Angela graciously shares with us.

About Angela

Angela Kaloudis (she/her) is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor with particular expertise in treating eating disorders, trauma & complex dissociation, as well as perinatal mood and anxiety disorders (PMAD).In addition to her outpatient practice, Angela is a supervisor and clinical leader at a nationally recognized eating disorder facility. 

She adheres to the principles of Health At Every Size®, meaning she will support people in ALL bodies in engaging in health-promoting behaviors and living a value-oriented life.

To Angela, being a genuine and authentic human and therapist is her top priority. Angela is known for her non-judgmental, caring, and compassionately firm nature, weaving in humor throughout. She makes space for all that her clients bring into the room and approaches situations with curiosity and care while challenging her clients to lean into difficult emotions. She deeply believes that therapeutic relationship is the strongest vehicle of change.

When she is not working, Angela loves to spend time with her family, read, connect with her community, and be with her dog, Apollo, who is always ready for a good game of fetch.

Resources

Angela Kaloudis, LMHC

The Multi-Service Eating Disorders Association, Inc

MEDA's Free Recovery Community Message Boards

The National Alliance for Eating Disorders

National Alliance for Eating Disorders Helpline 1-866-662-1235 (M-F 9a-7p)

ANAD & ANAD Helpline 1-888-375-7767

Project Heal

An Infinite Mind

Trailblazing the Way-Dr. Adrian Fletcher

Institute for Creative Mindfulness

Dr Jamie Marich

Katie Keech, LMFT

Podcast Legal Disclaimer

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Listening to this podcast does not establish a therapist-client relationship between the listener and the host. Always seek the guidance of a qualified mental health professional with any questions you may have regarding your mental health or medical condition. If you are in crisis or in need of immediate support, please contact a licensed mental health provider or emergency services in your area.