“I want you to take action towards what you fantasize about.”

On Hotter Than Ever, we've delved deep into the world of online dating, including strategies for crafting the perfect profile and navigating the digital landscape of romance. But what about the lost art of meeting people the old-fashioned way–in real life? 

In this episode, Erin shares her experience stepping outside of her comfort zone and attending two in-person events: a LA matchmaking mixer and a BDSM munch. From navigating awkward encounters to unexpected connections, Erin explores the nuances of stepping out from behind the screen to meet people face-to-face, including:

• The transformative power of discomfort: how pushing boundaries leads to personal growth
• Embracing the moment, seeking genuine connections, and adopting a “no expectations” mindset
• The importance of exploring your passions and actively pursuing desires, especially in midlife
• Cultivating a deeper sense of self-love, joy, and fulfillment, regardless of societal norms or expectations

Want advice about some aspect of your life over 40?  DM us on IG  @hotterthaneverpod or text/leave a voicemail on the Hotter Than Ever Hottie Hotline at (323) 844-2303 and your question could end up on the show!

Want more Hotter Than Ever? Subscribe to the Hotter Than Ever Substack to support our work and find episode transcripts online at www.hotterthaneverpod.com 

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Follow Hotter Than Ever wherever you listen to podcasts so you never miss an episode! 

We’d love to hear what you think about the show - tell us what stories are resonating with you by writing us a review on Apple Podcasts. 

If you’re enjoying the show, consider supporting us! It’s as simple as buying us a coffee!

“Loneliness is the thing that's keeping women from rising and I don't want to see that anymore.” 

As part of her research for The Li.st, Ann Shoket uncovered a staggering statistic: 80% of women in white collar careers are lonely because of their jobs. As heartbreaking as that is, it didn’t surprise Ann, who as the former editor of Seventeen and CosmoGIRL magazines, is no stranger to the loneliness women face as they rise higher up the corporate ladder. Now as CEO of The Li.st, Ann is on a mission to combat the loneliness epidemic for women in the workplace and foster community and connection so that women can show up as their full selves.

Join us for an empowering conversation, as Erin and Ann discuss redefining traditional notions of power, embracing vulnerability, and offer actionable strategies for women to cultivate connections and reclaim agency in their professional lives, including:

• Why women often struggle to reconcile their authentic selves with their careers, leading to loneliness or an inability to fully express themselves at work.
• Redefining power as collaborative, transparent, and inclusive helps create environments where women feel empowered to thrive
• Why employers have a responsibility to combat loneliness and create environments that foster transparency and collaboration
• "Community cultivators" and nurturing “micro-habits” of simple check-ins and offering connections or support.
• The difference in how loneliness is created/triggered by men and women in the workplace
• How to stop seeking permission and instead gather like-minded individuals to drive change in the workplace

OUR GUEST: Ann Shoket is a CEO, Media Brand Builder, Next Gen Expert, and former Editor-in-Chief of Seventeen magazine. Known for redefining ambition and success for women, Shoket has launched and revitalized media brands like CosmoGIRL and Seventeen. Currently CEO and Owner of TheLi.st, she's reshaping content, community, and connection. Author of "The Big Life," she's also consulted for Good Morning America and judged on America's Next Top Model.

Want more Ann? Find her online at https://www.annshoket.com/ and read her book https://www.annshoket.com/book. Follow her on:

• Instagram: @annshoket
• X/Twitter: @annshoket
• Facebook: @ann.shoket
• LinkedIn: @annshoket

Want more Hotter Than Ever? Find us and episode transcripts online at www.hotterthaneverpod.com and subscribe to the Hotter Than Ever Substack to support our work.

Follow us on:

• Instagram: @hotterthaneverpod  
• TikTok: @hotterthaneverpod   
• Youtube: @hotterthaneverpod  
• Facebook: @hotterthaneverpod  

Follow Hotter Than Ever wherever you listen to podcasts so you never miss an episode! 

We’d love to hear what you think about the show - tell us what stories are resonating with you by writing us a review on Apple Podcasts. 

If you’re enjoying the show, consider supporting us! It’s as simple as buying us a coffee!

Want advice about some aspect of your life over 40?  DM us on IG  @hotterthaneverpod or text/leave a voicemail on the Hotter Than Ever Hottie Hotline at (323) 844-2303 and your question could end up on the show!

“You can be a good mom who is available to your kids and who is also experiencing a sexual becoming.”

Starting your sexual awakening journey in midlife can sometimes feel like threading through a maze of practicalities, particularly if you're juggling kids and career. Luckily, Erin is here to take the reins, drawing from her firsthand experience, to guide us through.  From treating her romantic life as a part-time job to embracing solo polyamory with transparency and honesty, Erin offers practical advice on making room for pleasure amidst the demands of parenting and modern life.  In this episode, we explore:

• How to carve out dedicated time for your dating and romantic life, treating it with the same level of importance as other aspects of your life
• Utilizing childcare resources to create space for your sexual growth and exploration
• Exploring multiple connections without the constraints of traditional monogamy
• Prioritizing pleasure tools like masturbation, erotic literature, audio erotica, or sexting apps as a hobby

Want advice about some aspect of your life over 40?  DM us on IG  @hotterthaneverpod or text/leave a voicemail on the Hotter Than Ever Hottie Hotline at (323) 844-2303 and your question could end up on the show!

Want more Hotter Than Ever? Find us online at www.hotterthaneverpod.com and sign up for our mailing list! Follow us on:

• Instagram: @hotterthaneverpod  
• TikTok: @hotterthaneverpod   
• Youtube: @hotterthaneverpod  
• Facebook: @hotterthaneverpod  

Follow Hotter Than Ever wherever you listen to podcasts - we’re on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and more! That way you’ll never miss an episode. 

We’d love to hear what you think about the show - it helps us know what stories are resonating with you. DM us on Instagram and write us a review!

Tracy Clark-Flory’s sexual exploration  began at the age of 12, when she ventured into AOL chat rooms, seeking to discover what men wanted sexually. In her memoir, "Want Me: A Sex Writer's Journey into the Heart of Desire," Tracy details her personal sexual coming of age through the maze hyper-sexualized media, where she grappled with the conflicting messages dictating her sexual identity. It wasn't until her tenure as a sex journalist and the dawn of deeper relationships that she unearthed a profound truth: there's no universal formula for male desire. This revelation sparked a profound shift, leading her to prioritize her own sexual fulfillment.

Join Erin and Tracy for a conversation spanning the portrayal of sexuality in media to the complexities of sexual experiences, including orgasms and the performance of desire, as we explore:

• The clash of feminism and hyper-sexualization in media and its impact on young women's journey to self-discovery
• The pressure women face to conform to performative standards of desirability for men
• Feminist theory's role in untangling society's conflicting messages about sexuality
• Exposing the myths surrounding pornography and the importance of media literacy
• Faking orgasms and how to pursue genuine pleasure 
• The intersection of motherhood and sexuality, and the liberating journey towards self-awareness and acceptance that comes with age

OUR GUEST: Tracy Clark-Flory is a journalist, essayist, and author of the memoir “Want Me: A Sex Writer's Journey into the Heart of Desire”, an NPR best book of the year. Clark-Flory has written for Cosmopolitan, Elle, Esquire, Glamour, The Guardian, and The Washington Post. She is a former senior staff writer at Jezebel and Salon. Her work has shown up in the Best Sex Writing anthology and she has been called “one of the best journalists of our generation writing about sexuality.” She writes a weekly newsletter on sex, feminism, motherhood, and pop culture at tracyclarkflory.substack.com.

Want more Tracy? 

• Find her online at https://www.tracyclarkflory.com/ and tracyclarkflory.substack.com. 
• Follow her on Instagram @tracyclarkflory   
• Read her book Want Me: A Sex Writer's Journey into the Heart of Desire

Want more Hotter Than Ever? Find us and episode transcripts online at www.hotterthaneverpod.com and sign up for our mailing list! Follow us on:

• Instagram: @hotterthaneverpod  
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• Youtube: @hotterthaneverpod  
• Facebook: @hotterthaneverpod  

We’d love to hear what you think about the show - tell us what stories are resonating with you by writing us a review on Apple Podcasts. 

Want advice about some aspect of your life over 40?  DM us on IG  @hotterthaneverpod or text/leave a voicemail on the Hotter Than Ever Hottie Hotline at (323) 844-2303 and your question could end up on the show!

Sometimes women get stuck in a marriage that is no longer working, but they’re unable to break free due to logistical constraints.  Add a skyrocketing libido and an irresistible crush into the mix, and today’s caller has got herself one h*ll of a scenario. Fear not, because in this episode, we dive into the art of juggling desire and commitment when divorce isn't an immediate option.

Join Erin as she offers candid insights and guidance, illuminating the path towards personal liberation and fulfillment within the confines of marriage, including:

• The importance of having open and honest communication with your partner 
• Advocating for your emotional and sexual needs within the relationship
• Considering alternative arrangements, such as separation or evolving the relationship into a different form, even if you’re still married on paper
• Allowing yourself to explore newfound desires and attractions

Want advice about some aspect of your life over 40?  DM us on IG  @hotterthaneverpod or text/leave a voicemail on the Hotter Than Ever Hottie Hotline at (323) 844-2303 and your question could end up on the show!

Want more Hotter Than Ever? Find us online at www.hotterthaneverpod.com and sign up for our mailing list! Follow us on:

• Instagram: @hotterthaneverpod  
• TikTok: @hotterthaneverpod   
• Youtube: @hotterthaneverpod  
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090728330453  

Follow Hotter Than Ever wherever you listen to podcasts - we’re on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and more! That way you’ll never miss an episode. 

We’d love to hear what you think about the show - it helps us know what stories are resonating with you. DM us on Instagram and write us a review!

"Unresolved, unprocessed grief really lays a heavy tattoo inside your system."

With more than two decades as a seasoned psychotherapist, Meghan Riordan Jarvis found herself unexpectedly thrust into the throes of her own grief upon the sudden loss of her mother. Through this profound personal journey, Meghan gained an intimate understanding of the very trauma and PTSD she had long treated in her patients. Now, with her podcast "Grief is My Side Hustle" and the bestselling book "The End of The Hour", Meghan is on a mission to foster a culture more attuned to the nuances of grief.

In this episode, Meghan delves into the intricate layers of loss, highlighting the necessity of processing grief. From navigating the unpredictable tides of emotion to unraveling the physiological toll grief exacts on the body, Erin and Meghan offer a compassionate perspective on embracing discomfort and honoring the complexities of the human experience. Join us as we discuss:

• Grief as an integral part of the human experience, that transcends background and circumstance.
• The interplay between emotions and feelings and the subconscious currents that shape our emotional responses.
• The physiological impact of unresolved grief on the body, from digestive issues to chronic pain, and the importance of holistic healing.
• Meghan's personal journey through grief and trauma, including her experiences with loss, PTSD, and the transformative power of surrender and vulnerability.
• Renegotiating boundaries, quiet quitting, and cultivating authentic connections for resilience and grace.

OUR GUEST: Meghan Riordan Jarvis, MA, LCSW is an author and speaker, specializing in trauma, grief, and loss. With over 20 years of clinical experience, Meghan's personal encounter with PTSD after her parents' deaths led her to advocate for a more grief-informed culture. Founder of MRJ Consulting, Meghan and her team work with Fortune 500 companies to address grief in the workplace. She is the author of the best-selling memoir "The End of The Hour" and of the upcoming book "Can Anyone Tell Me Why: Essential Questions About Grief and Loss".

Want more Meghan? Find her online at https://meghanriordanjarvis.com/ and listen to her podcast Grief is My Side Hustle. Follow her on:

• Instagram: @meghan.riordan.jarvis  
• Facebook: @griefismysidehustle & @meghan.jarvis.12  
• LinkedIn: Meghan Riordan Jarvis, MA LICSW  

Want more Hotter Than Ever? Find us and episode transcripts online at www.hotterthaneverpod.com and sign up for our mailing list! Follow us on:

• Instagram: @hotterthaneverpod  
• TikTok: @hotterthaneverpod   
• Youtube: @hotterthaneverpod  
• Facebook: @hotterthaneverpod  

Follow Hotter Than Ever wherever you listen to podcasts so you never miss an episode! 

We’d love to hear what you think about the show - tell us what stories are resonating with you by writing us a review on Apple Podcasts. 

Want advice about some aspect of your life over 40?  DM us on IG  @hotterthaneverpod or text/leave a voicemail on the Hotter Than Ever Hottie Hotline at (323) 844-2303 and your question could end up on the show!

“Share information about your breakup with the new people in your life whenever it feels right”

Breakups are universally painful, regardless of the circumstances. And after a long-term relationship, it can be daunting to dip your toes back into the dating pool. In today’s episode, we’re tackling a listener's question about reentering the dating scene after a challenging breakup. With a decade-long relationship behind them, our listener grapples with how to discuss the breakup with others, while being respectful of their ex’s mental health issues.

Join us as Erin dives into the complexities of navigating post-breakup dating. From acknowledging the pain of a breakup to reclaiming agency in sharing personal narratives, we discuss:

• Acknowledging the courage it takes to pursue new connections
• How to hold compassion and understanding for both yourself and your ex-partner
• Allowing yourself the freedom to share personal details at your own pace
• How crafting a script for the breakup can help you navigate conversations with new partners
• Releasing yourself from the need to protect others’ perceptions of your ex-partner

Want advice about some aspect of your life over 40?  DM us on IG  @hotterthaneverpod or text/leave a voicemail on the Hotter Than Ever Hottie Hotline at (323) 844-2303 and your question could end up on the show!

Want more Hotter Than Ever? Find us online at www.hotterthaneverpod.com and sign up for our mailing list! Follow us on:

• Instagram: @hotterthaneverpod  
• TikTok: @hotterthaneverpod   
• Youtube: @hotterthaneverpod  
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090728330453  

Follow Hotter Than Ever wherever you listen to podcasts - we’re on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and more! That way you’ll never miss an episode. 

We’d love to hear what you think about the show - it helps us know what stories are resonating with you. DM us on Instagram and write us a review!

“You don't find fulfillment in material things”

You've heard the advice to "buy less" or "consume mindfully," but have you ever considered going cold turkey on buying altogether? As she chronicles in her book, "How to Buy Essentially Nothing for a Year,” Elizabeth Chai, a graphic designer by trade, did just that. For the past five years, Liz has refrained from purchasing anything non-essential, and she's here to share how this decision has brought her newfound freedom from trends and a deeper appreciation for what’s right in front of her.

In this episode, Liz unpacks her decision to abstain from buying, debunking the misconception that minimalism means living in a stark, white box. Instead, she reveals how it's about aligning your lifestyle with your values and priorities, while fostering gratitude for the possessions you already have. Join us as we explore:

• How possessions often become symbols of identity and status and drive us to accumulate belongings unconsciously.
• Practical tips for distinguishing between needs and wants, helping you make intentional purchasing decisions.
• Shifting from mindless consumption to intentional living, and how it cultivates gratitude.
• Embracing community-driven practices like clothing swaps and buy-nothing groups.
• The effectiveness of tools like the “minimalism game” in decluttering and reevaluating your relationship with material possessions.
• The pitfalls of “retail therapy” and the importance of seeking fulfillment beyond materialism.
• The importance of committing to significant changes and holding yourself accountable with the support of others.

OUR GUEST: Elizabeth Chai is a graphic designer and self-proclaimed "Coffee Designer," blending her passions for design and the specialty coffee industry. Five years ago, she decided to make a significant change by abstaining from purchasing anything for an entire year, a narrative she shares in her book “How to Buy Essentially Nothing for a Year”. Through her experiences, Elizabeth aims to inspire others to embark on their own paths of self-reflection and intentional living.

Want more Liz? Find her and her book online at https://www.buyessentiallynothing.com/ and read more about her project in the New York Times. Follow her on Instagram @chaiamericano.

Want more Hotter Than Ever? Find us and episode transcripts online at www.hotterthaneverpod.com and sign up for our mailing list! Follow us on:

• Instagram: @hotterthaneverpod  
• TikTok: @hotterthaneverpod   
• Youtube: @hotterthaneverpod  
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090728330453  

Follow Hotter Than Ever wherever you listen to podcasts so you never miss an episode! 

We’d love to hear what you think about the show - tell us what stories are resonating with you by writing us a review on Apple Podcasts. 

Want advice about some aspect of your life over 40?  DM us on IG  @hotterthaneverpod or text/leave a voicemail on the Hotter Than Ever Hottie Hotline at (323) 844-2303 and your question could end up on the show!

“It really changes our lives when we give ourselves permission to have all the pleasure we deserve.”

Are using dating apps the modern-day equivalent of juggling a part-time job? For one of our listeners, the allure of Pure, a sexting app, has sparked both a whirlwind of fun and distraction that begs the question: How long will it last? Join Erin on this episode as she delves into the tantalizing world of digital intimacy, sharing her own experiences with and a myriad of dating apps.

From anonymous sexting with zero stakes to setting boundaries and embracing validation, Erin offers candid insights from her experiences on managing attention and fulfillment in the realm of online connections.

• What sets Pure apart from other apps, and how to engage in anonymous and fun sexting experiences
• Breaking down the landscape of dating apps and what each one is best for
• Why online flirting is deeply validating and how you can  embrace the positive attention that comes from dating apps
• Setting boundaries and listening to your intuition when interacting with potential partners on dating apps
• Tips for staying anonymous and communicating safely on the apps

Want advice about some aspect of your life over 40?  DM us on IG  @hotterthaneverpod or text/leave a voicemail on the Hotter Than Ever Hottie Hotline at (323) 844-2303 and your question could end up on the show!

Want more Hotter Than Ever? Find us online at www.hotterthaneverpod.com and sign up for our mailing list! Follow us on:

• Instagram: @hotterthaneverpod  
• TikTok: @hotterthaneverpod   
• Youtube: @hotterthaneverpod  
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090728330453  

Follow Hotter Than Ever wherever you listen to podcasts - we’re on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and more! That way you’ll never miss an episode. 

We’d love to hear what you think about the show - it helps us know what stories are resonating with you. DM us on Instagram and write us a review!

“How can I be the breadwinner and also the one who knows the name of my child's dentist?”

When Eve Rodsky received a text from her husband that read, “I'm surprised you didn't get blueberries”, it sparked a revelation. It wasn't just about the fruit; it was about the deeper imbalance in their household dynamics. Fast forward over a decade, and Eve has emerged as a leading voice in reshaping the gender division of labor. With two groundbreaking books under her belt – “Fair Play” and “Find Your Unicorn Space” – Eve's mission is clear: to revolutionize how partners share the burden of domestic responsibilities, ensuring women no longer shoulder the lion's share of unpaid labor.

Join Erin and Eve for as they delve into Eve's journey of creating a gamified system to tackle household inequalities. They explore how societal norms and gender expectations perpetuate disparities in domestic responsibilities, igniting a fiery discussion sure to spark change in your own partnership. Get ready to reexamine and recalibrate as we unpack:

• The concept of "Invisible Work" and its disproportionate burden on women, regardless of their career status or economic power.
• The importance of asserting agency in the home and advocating for an equitable distribution of labor.
• Recognizing and valuing the conception and planning of tasks, not just their execution.
• How men embracing greater domestic responsibilities can empower women in the workplace and mitigate the "motherhood penalty."
• Challenging the notion of infinite women's time versus finite men's time
• Debunking toxic beliefs that fuel unequal distribution of domestic labor
• The vital role of "unicorn space" in allowing women to pursue their passions outside traditional domestic roles.
• Society's fixation on toxic positivity and the unrealistic expectations it puts on women to be constantly happy.

OUR GUEST: Eve Rodsky, a Harvard-trained attorney and organizational management expert, turned a personal struggle into a catalyst for social change when she asked the simple yet profound question: What would happen if we treated our homes as our most important organizations? Her bestselling book, “Fair Play”, offers a gamified system for balancing domestic workload and reimagining relationships, sparking vital conversations about unpaid labor. In her latest work, “Find Your Unicorn Space,” Rodsky explores the intersection of creativity, productivity, and resilience, offering an antidote to burnout. Born and raised by a single mom in NYC, she now resides in Los Angeles with her husband, Seth, and three children.

Want more Eve? Find her online at http://www.everodsky.com/ and https://www.fairplaylife.com/. Follow her on:

• Instagram (@everodsky & @fairplaylife)
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/everodsky/ 

Want more Hotter Than Ever? Find us and episode transcripts online at www.hotterthaneverpod.com and sign up for our mailing list! Follow us on:

• Instagram: @hotterthaneverpod  
• TikTok: @hotterthaneverpod   
• Youtube: @hotterthaneverpod  
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090728330453  

Follow Hotter Than Ever wherever you listen to podcasts so you never miss an episode! 

We’d love to hear what you think about the show - tell us what stories are resonating with you by writing us a review on Apple Podcasts. 

Want advice about some aspect of your life over 40?  DM us on IG  @hotterthaneverpod or text/leave a voicemail on the Hotter Than Ever Hottie Hotline at (323) 844-2303 and your question could end up on the show!