The Big Silence

How to Stop Repeating Your Parents' Patterns | Dr. Shefali Tsabary on Conscious Parenting


Listen Later

In this conversation with Dr. Shefali Tsabary, clinical psychologist and author of The Conscious Parent, Karena explores how unhealed childhood wounds get passed down through generations, why traditional discipline doesn't work, and how the three-step process of awareness, acceptance, and action can help you break toxic patterns — whether you're a parent or not.

How do we stop unconsciously passing our unhealed wounds onto the people we love most?

The path to conscious parenting begins not with your child — but with you.


(00:23) From Psychologist to Conscious Parent: The Origin Story

  1. Why Dr. Shefali's work applies to anyone who has ever had a parent
  2. Her journey from clinical psychology to meditation to motherhood
  3. How unhealed childhood baggage gets projected onto the people we love most

(06:55) Triggers, Boundaries & Breaking the Cycle

  1. Why nothing outside of you is truly the trigger, only the match
  2. Why real boundaries are internal actions, not instructions to other people
  3. The three-step path forward: awareness, acceptance, action

(11:12) Screens, Mental Health & the Disconnection Crisis

  1. “Screens are the worst thing to happen to children."
  2. Anxiety in girls has doubled; suicidality in boys is at an all-time high
  3. The real culprit: Overstimulation and disconnection from the present moment
  4. Connection is the antidote to all emotional disease

(15:10) Control, Happiness & the Wake-Up Call We're All Avoiding

  1. Why the need to control comes from having been controlled in childhood
  2. The numbing epidemic: Netflix, dead-end relationships
  3. What it takes to honestly say "I don't like my life"
  4. How compliance in children (and adults) leads to eventual breakdown

(23:11) Role Reversal, Self-Love & the Books That Can Change Your Life

  1. A community question on growing up as the caretaker and what happens when you need care
  2. Karena shares her painful experience as her mother's caretaker in her final five years
  3. Dr. Shefali's truth: "No one can love us the way we need — that's everyone's ultimate lesson."

Thanks for the support from our partners, including:


Guest Resources
  1. Visit Dr. Shefali's website
  2. Get a 30-day free pass to Dr. Shefali's community! Email her office and mention The Big Silence
  3. Order her books
  4. Follow her on Instagram


If this episode moved you, please consider supporting The Big Silence Foundation and exploring our resources:

Connect with The Big Silence Community

  1. Order: The Big Silence Memoir audiobook
...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

The Big SilenceBy Karena Dawn

  • 4.9
  • 4.9
  • 4.9
  • 4.9
  • 4.9

4.9

145 ratings


More shows like The Big Silence

View all
The Bossticks by Lauryn Bosstick and Michael Bosstick / Dear Media

The Bossticks

14,953 Listeners

LadyGang by PodcastOne

LadyGang

11,206 Listeners

The Rachel Hollis Podcast by Three Percent Chance

The Rachel Hollis Podcast

16,654 Listeners

The Liz Moody Podcast by Liz Moody

The Liz Moody Podcast

3,176 Listeners

Call Her Daddy by Alex Cooper

Call Her Daddy

166,101 Listeners

The Dream Bigger Podcast by Siffat Haider

The Dream Bigger Podcast

605 Listeners

Not Skinny But Not Fat by Dear Media, Amanda Hirsch

Not Skinny But Not Fat

6,218 Listeners

Well with Arielle Lorre by Dear Media, Arielle Lorre

Well with Arielle Lorre

4,083 Listeners

Real Pod by Dear Media

Real Pod

3,414 Listeners

The Art of Being Well by Dear Media, Will Cole

The Art of Being Well

1,475 Listeners

Lipstick on the Rim by Sony Music Entertainment

Lipstick on the Rim

1,034 Listeners

The Dr. Shannon Show by Dr. Shannon Ritchey, PT, DPT

The Dr. Shannon Show

1,107 Listeners

The Mel Robbins Podcast by Mel Robbins

The Mel Robbins Podcast

20,306 Listeners

Let's Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari by Dear Media

Let's Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari

3,447 Listeners

Khloé in Wonder Land by Khloé Kardashian

Khloé in Wonder Land

3,110 Listeners