What if the guilt and shame you carry as a mother or caretaker weren’t yours to begin with?



In this episode of The Big Silence, Karena Dawn sits down with Vanessa Bennett, LMFT, licensed depth therapist, and author of the new book, The Motherhood Myth

From growing up as a “parentified child” to raising her daughter with intention, Vanessa shares how generational wounds, from the “witch wound” to the “mother wound”, shape our lives in ways we may not realize. Together, they explore self-abandonment, the myth of perfection, codependency in relationships, and how to reclaim your identity through micro moments of self-choosing. Whether you’re a mother, daughter, partner, or friend, this conversation offers tangible ways to break cycles, set boundaries, and follow the breadcrumbs back to yourself.

How Do We Heal Generational Wounds Without Losing Ourselves?

Vanessa reveals how recognizing inherited patterns and our part in them is the first step to breaking free.

(00:00:22) Depth Psychology and the Path to Individuation

• Vanessa explains depth psychology as the “psychology of the soul,” focusing on the whole being and the unconscious.
• Her upbringing as a parentified child and how it shaped her initial decision not to have children.
• The importance of holding your upbringing objectively to heal. “They're not all bad. And also, they're not all good.”

(00:06:11) The Trinity Wound: Witch, Sister, and Mother

• The witch wound: epigenetic trauma silencing women’s power, sexuality, and individuality.
• The sister wound: competition among women fueled by scarcity thinking.
• The mother wound: how women unconsciously uphold patriarchy and pass down harmful narratives.
• Why ending these cycles starts with self-awareness and modeling change for the next generation.

(00:12:30) Self-Abandonment, Guilt, and Rebuilding Your Sense of Self

• Guilt and shame are by design. They are tools of societal control, not signs you’re broken.
• Accept guilt as part of the process, then act anyway.
• Use “micro moments”  (like saying no when you mean it) as bricks in the foundation of self-trust.
• Following breadcrumbs: orienting toward what makes you feel alive, even if it’s small or scary.

(00:22:09) Codependency, Resentment, and Healthy Boundaries

• We live in a codependent culture that teaches us to outsource our emotional regulation.
• Resentment as a diagnostic tool: a signal that a boundary is being crossed or unspoken.
• Attachment styles are fluid and change depending on the relationship dynamic.
• The link between resentment and projection and how awareness can stop the cycle.
• Why attraction often fades when relationships take on a parental dynamic, and how both partners can reclaim responsibility for their own happiness.

(00:32:50) Friendships, Attachment Styles, and Communication

• Vanessa and her co-host model conflict resolution through a commitment to talk about issues openly.
• The cultural trap of expecting a partner to “reparent” us and why it can kill romantic attraction.
• Building safety without losing mystery or eros in long-term relationships.

(00:40:17) Therapy, Accessibility, and the Power of Group Work

• Why therapists need therapists, and the stigma that still exists around seeking help.
• Alternative paths to healing: coaches, low-cost group programs, and community support.
• Vanessa’s Inner Compass Collective: a “class pass” of wellness with multiple therapists, coaches, and modalities.

(00:46:25) Breaking Shame with Conversation

• Group work and shared experiences dissolve the isolation of shame.
• Why talking openly about mental health creates collective healing.
• Vanessa’s call to reject constructed shame and choose to live without it.

Thanks for the support from our partners:

Let our sponsor BetterHelp connect you to a therapist who can support you - all from the comfort of your own home. Visit https://betterhelp.com/thebigsilence and enjoy a special discount on your first month.If you have any questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are licensed, their privacy policy, or therapist compensation model, check out this FAQ: https://www.betterhelp.com/your-questions-answered/

Have a message for Karena? She'd love to hear from you and share your comment or question on air!

Leave Karena a voicemail: https://www.speakpipe.com/KarenaDawn

Guest Resources

• Follow Vanessa on Instagram
• Check out her website
• Join: The Inner Compass Collective
• Order: The Motherhood Myth
• Listen:  Cheaper Than Therapy the Podcast

If this episode moved you, please consider supporting The Big Silence Foundation and exploring our resources:

Connect with The Big Silence Community

• Order: The Big Silence Memoir audiobook
• Shop The Big Silence Self Love Collection
• Subscribe on YouTube
• Donate to The Big Silence Foundation

Mentioned in this episode:

Let our sponsor BetterHelp connect you to a therapist who can support you - all from the comfort of your own home. Visit betterhelp.com/thebigsilence and enjoy a special discount on your first month.

If you have any questions about the brand relating to how the therapists are licensed, their privacy policy, or therapist compensation model, check out this FAQ: betterhelp.com/your-questions-answered.

What if the path to healing wasn’t in returning to the life you had, but in dreaming up an even better one?



In this powerful episode of The Big Silence, Karena Dawn sits down with Ukrainian psychologist and motivational speaker Natalia Kholodenko. Once a TV star living a glamorous life in Kyiv, Natalia lost everything in an instant when war broke out. Forced to flee, she faced displacement, trauma, and the collapse of her identity, but she refused to give up. Now rebuilding her life while helping others do the same, Natalia opens up about finding meaning in pain, rebuilding self-worth, and the daily practices that anchor her through the darkest moments.

Can Your Dreams Be Stronger Than Your Trauma?

Natalia shares how she went from surviving bombings to speaking on international stages, rebuilding her life through imagination, purpose, and healing. Her story is a blueprint for how to find meaning after loss.

(00:01:00) Fame to Flight: Losing It All and Starting Over

• Natalia reflects on her life before the war: fame, wealth, and red carpets, and how it all vanished overnight.
• The hardest part wasn’t losing material things, but losing the belief in herself.
• “You are not alive when you are just surviving,” she says—describing how she knew she had to make a change.

(00:08:00) The Steps to Rebuilding: From Despair to Dreaming

• She shares how survivor’s guilt set in and how she found meaning by choosing to live in honor of those who didn’t make it.
• “Dream is more powerful than trauma.” Natalia explains how imagining a “huge future” helped her begin again.
• From dreams came plans, and from plans came people to help. She shares the importance of turning imagination into action.
• Her philosophy: never stop dreaming, because good dreams create good plans, and good plans can fuel a good future.
• “We are marketologists for our lives,” she says. Speak bad things, and you’ll believe them. Speak dreams, and your brain follows.

(00:14:00) Leading While Healing: How Helping Others Helped Herself

• Even while navigating her own trauma, Natalia started speaking online to women in pain, discovering healing in connection.
• She shares how her live streams helped survivors practice joy and laughter, turning them into tools for survival.
• “I only found myself again in this life.” Viewing what happened as a gift that helped her discover her life’s work

(00:17:00) Biohacks for the Soul: Daily Rituals That Anchor Her

• Every morning, Natalia visualizes giving an interview about her dream life. “I talk to the future me,” she explains.
• Cold water immersion is her go-to anti-stress tool
• Singing is a daily practice. Even silly made-up songs rewire the brain for joy.
• She’s even sung with Gloria Gaynor in support of Ukraine, proof that big dreams can come true.

Guest Resources

• Follow Natalia on Instagram + @kholodenkon 
• Visit her website
• Help Ukrainians in need

If this episode moved you, please consider supporting The Big Silence Foundation and exploring our resources:

Connect with The Big Silence Community

• Order: The Big Silence Memoir audiobook
• Shop The Big Silence Self Love Collection
• Subscribe on YouTube
• Donate to The Big Silence Foundation

What if your doctor was the one who needed saving?

In this eye-opening episode of The Big Silence, Karena Dawn sits down with Dr. Darshan Shah, a surgeon, longevity expert, and founder of Next Health. After decades in medicine and a career spent helping others, Dr. Shah found himself battling chronic disease, obesity, depression, and burnout. But it wasn’t pills or procedures that saved him. It was a radical shift toward root-cause healing and functional medicine. This episode dives deep into the science behind metabolic health, food and mood, hormones, inflammation, and even Alzheimer’s prevention. If you’ve ever felt like your health was spiraling or your mind was foggy beyond repair, this conversation is your invitation to start again from a smarter, stronger, and more self-aware place.

What’s the Real Cause of Chronic Illness, and Can We Reverse It Without Medication?

Dr. Shah explains why most health advice treats symptoms, not causes, and how root-cause medicine, nutrition, and tracking your biomarkers can change everything.

(00:03:15) When the Doctor Becomes the Patient: Dr. Shah’s Wake-Up Call

• At 42, Dr. Shah was 50 pounds overweight, had high blood pressure, prediabetes, and depression — despite being a leading surgeon.
• He realized that traditional medicine taught him how to treat disease, but not how to prevent or reverse it.
• His journey into functional medicine began with uncovering the root causes of mental and physical illness.
• The experience made him rethink everything he thought he knew about health — and launched his mission to transform care from reactive to proactive.

(00:11:05) Food, Mood & Metabolic Disease: What Your Grocery Cart Isn’t Telling You

• Ultra-processed foods cause nutrient deficiencies, inflammation, and metabolic chaos — and often trigger depression and anxiety.
• Reducing sugar and refined carbs (like bread, pasta, and pastries) is critical to brain and body health.
• Dr. Shah recommends key books:
• Good Energy by Dr. Casey Means
• Brain Energy by Dr. Christopher Palmer
• Glucose Revolution by Jessie Inchauspé
• Metabolic health is deeply connected to mental health — you can’t treat one without addressing the other.

(00:14:19) Hormones, Bloodwork & Becoming the Boss of Your Own Biology

• Most doctors don’t check thyroid, testosterone, or estrogen levels — even though these regulate nearly every cell in your body.
• Annual (or even quarterly) bloodwork is essential to catch changes before they become diagnoses.
• At home, you can track body composition with a bioimpedance scale and sleep/stress with wearables.
• Knowing your health data empowers you to take action before symptoms spiral.

(00:18:44) Fitness for Longevity: Why “Exercise Snacks” Work Better Than the Gym

• Dr. Shah encourages 3–5 minute movement breaks throughout the day — called “exercise snacks” — to counteract sedentary behavior.
• Research shows that every 45 minutes of sitting increases your risk of disease. Breaking it up adds up fast.
• Karena shares how she intuitively built strength this way with small workout breaks.
• Your genome is malleable, based 95% on your day-to-day habits and 5 % genetics.

(00:24:22) Alzheimer’s, Genes & How to Take Control of Your Brain’s Future

• Having the APOE gene doesn’t guarantee Alzheimer’s, but lifestyle factors like poor sleep, sugar consuption, and inflammation increase risk.
• Dr. Shah outlines 15 modifiable root causes of cognitive decline, from toxins to sedentary behavior.
• Healing your gut, balancing blood sugar, and protecting your mitochondria can dramatically reduce your risk.
• Recommended read: The End of Alzheimer’s by Dr. Dale Bredesen.

(00:32:49) Inflammation, Gut Health & the Truth About Probiotics

• The #1 inflammation marker to know is HSCRP: it should be as close to zero as possible.
• Gut health is foundational! 90% of inflammation starts there. That means less sugar, more fiber, fermented foods, and even bone broth.
• Oral hygiene matters too: gum disease can lead to systemic inflammation.
• Probiotic picks:
• Foods first (fermented foods, yogurt, fiber)
• Supplements for gut/metabolic health

(00:38:00) Supplements That Work (and the Ones Dr. Shah Takes)

• His daily must-haves:
• 
  
• Vitamin D3 + K2
• Omega-3s
• Methylated B vitamins (especially if you have MTHFR mutation)
• Creatine (great for muscle + brain)
• Thoughts on stem cell therapy, NAD, and the best forms to use

(00:42:00) Next Health & The Future of Wellness Access

• Dr. Shah’s clinics are nationwide (L.A., NYC, Nashville, Austin, Miami), offering biomarker testing, cryotherapy, IVs, and more.
• Big Silence listeners can mention the show to receive a complimentary experience at any location.
• Download Dr. Shah’s free biomarker guide at https://www.drshah.com/biomarkers to take your first step toward data-driven health.

Guest Resources

• Check out his website: https://www.drshah.com/
• Get Your FREE Biomarker Guide: https://www.drshah.com/biomarkers
• Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/darshanshahmd/

If this episode moved you, please consider supporting The Big Silence Foundation and exploring our resources:

Connect with The Big Silence Community

• Order: The Big Silence Memoir audiobook
• Shop The Big Silence Self Love Collection
• Subscribe on YouTube
• Donate to The Big Silence Foundation

What does it really mean to be optimistic?

In this Flow Space edition of The Big Silence, Karena Dawn sits down with Dr. Deepika Chopra, known as the “Optimism Doctor”, live from the Women’s Health Summit in LA. Drawing from her background in psychology, neuroscience, and lived experience, Dr. Chopra debunks the myth that optimism is about “being positive.” Instead, she offers science-backed tools to build mental resilience, process worry, and shift your brain toward the future you want to create. From dancing first thing in the morning to scheduling daily “worry time,” this episode is packed with small, powerful rituals to help you feel more joy, no matter where your mind is now.

Could resilience be the true foundation of optimism? 

Dr. Chopra shares why optimism isn’t a constant state of happiness; it’s a mindset that acknowledges life’s challenges while staying open to growth, healing, and future possibility.

(00:02:00) Reframing Optimism: It’s Not About Being Positive All the Time

• Dr. Chopra defines real optimism as rooted in resiliency and curiosity, not blind positivity.
• Being an optimist means recognizing life’s setbacks, but seeing them as temporary and surmountable.
• She shares that optimism is a learnable skill, not just a personality trait.
• The science shows optimists live longer, thrive more, and have deeper connections.

(00:07:30) From Emo Journaling to Neuroscience: Her Unexpected Path to Optimism

• Deepika’s childhood emotional diaries foreshadowed her fascination with human behavior.
• Learning that the brain thinks in the future tense.
• Helping people anticipate good things and how to train your brain to do it.
• Research shows only about 25% of optimism is genetic—the rest is learned.

(00:09:40) Awe, Music, and Movement: Tools to Interrupt Anxiety

• Spending just two hours a week in nature significantly lowers stress and improves clarity.
• She starts every morning with her “wake-up and dance” routine to set a positive tone.
• Feelings of awe: How art, nature, and nostalgia help reset the brain and reduce anxiety.
• Happiness hack: Holding onto a positive thought for at least 12 seconds helps the brain create more of them.

(00:12:30) Feel It to Heal It: Why Optimism Starts With Honesty

• True optimism requires sitting with hard emotions, not bypassing them.
• Dr. Chopra explains the power of curiosity when you can’t access joy.
• Being neutral or open, even when in pain, is still progress.
• Staying present and inquisitive with where you are in the moment

(00:13:55) Schedule Your Worry: How Boundaries Can Free Your Mind

• Dr. Chopra shares her practice of “worry time”—a scheduled slot to process anxious thoughts.
• Throughout the day, she defers worries to that time, writing them down or mentally shelving them.
• Setting a clear boundary gives worries space without you being consumed by them.
• Surprisingly, the best solutions often arise when you’re feeling joy or calm.

(00:16:45) End Your Day With a To-DA! List (Not a To-Do List)

• Instead of an anxiety triggering nighttime to-do list, write down daily accomplishments.
• Even small wins count. Celebrating them boosts a sense of empowerment and self-worth.
• Gratitude can lose impact over time; the To-DA list keeps things specific and fresh.
• She emphasizes the power of feeling accomplished before bed.

Thanks for the support from our partners, including:

Guest Resources

• Explore her website
• Follow her on Instagram
• Listen to the Looking Up podcast

If this episode moved you, please consider supporting The Big Silence Foundation and exploring our resources:

Connect with The Big Silence Community

• Order: The Big Silence Memoir audiobook
• Shop The Big Silence Self Love Collection
• Subscribe on YouTube
• Donate to The Big Silence Foundation

What if midlife wasn’t something to fear, but something to own?

In this empowering episode recorded live at the Women’s Health Summit in LA, Karena sits down with actor and activist Constance Zimmer and filmmaker Abby Epstein to talk about aging, hormones, Hollywood, and how women are finally telling the truth about what it means to grow older. From the early days of the Vagina Monologues to the debut of their new project Midlife Monologues, Constance and Abby are lighting up taboo topics with humor, vulnerability, and a whole lot of truth-telling. This episode will leave you inspired to embrace your story; wrinkles, wisdom, hot flashes, and all.

What happens when women finally speak the unspeakable?

Reframing aging, menopause, and midlife not as an ending, but a power-filled beginning.

(00:00) The Midlife Glow-Up: Why Aging Is the New Prime

• Why the TikTok trend on women thriving in their 30s, 40s, and 50s is a needed cultural shift
• Ditching the age stigma and embracing confidence in midlife
• How storytelling has the power to normalize the aging experience

(03:50) Hormones, Trauma & the Real Talk Around Perimenopause

• Karena opens up about early menopause symptoms and trauma-related health shifts
• Abby shares insights from her certification as a midlife menopause coach
• Why we need to stop associating menopause with a number — and start listening to our bodies
• The double-edged sword of hormone therapy and wellness marketing: empowerment vs. exploitation

(08:45) From Hollywood to Hormones: Women's Stories on Stage

• Constance reflects on strong female roles and the scarcity of opportunities for women over 50
• How UnREAL and Entourage helped shift her career into meaningful, unapologetic characters
• Abby shares how directing The Vagina Monologues uncovered deep stories from performers and audiences alike
• The emotional labor behind directing: holding space for women’s hidden truths

(12:45) The Birth of the Midlife Monologues

• How a casual email turned into a groundbreaking collaboration between Constance and Abby
• Collecting personal stories from peers and actors about aging, change, and identity
• Why 2026 — the 30th anniversary of The Vagina Monologues — is the perfect time to launch
• Their goal: create a theatrical space for stories that ripple into collective healing

(14:45) Redefining Beauty, Power & Purpose as We Age

• Why aging women in Europe are revered — and how the U.S. is catching up (slowly)
• Constance’s motto: “Just let us age” — and why that’s still a radical statement
• The cultural cost of ignoring women's health and midlife experience
• Abby and Constance call for more visibility, celebration, and truth in women’s media

Guest Resources

• Follow Constance on Instagram
• Follow Abby on Instagram
• See the Midlife Monologues

If this episode moved you, please consider supporting The Big Silence Foundation and exploring our resources:

Connect with The Big Silence Community

• Order: The Big Silence Memoir audiobook
• Shop The Big Silence Self Love Collection
• Subscribe on YouTube
• Donate to The Big Silence Foundation

What if you were leading a major wellness media company while quietly struggling to follow the very advice you publish?



In this refreshingly candid episode of The Big Silence, Karena Dawn sits down with Samantha Skey, CEO of SheMedia and founder of Flowspace. Together, they dive into what it really means to age out loud, from the invisible weight of midlife caregiving to the truth about impostor syndrome, mental load, and why self-care often feels like another item on the to-do list. With humor, honesty, and a few clever fitness hacks, Samantha opens up about reclaiming space, not just in media, but in her own life.

Is prioritizing your well-being selfish? Or is it the secret to aging and leading with power?

Redefining success in your 40s and beyond means unlearning hustle culture, normalizing midlife health conversations, and building wellness into the moments you already have, even if it’s just five squats at a time.

(00:00:30) Women’s Health & the Third Chapter: Why Flowspace Matters

• Samantha shares how Flowspace was born out of a need to address midlife health, not just motherhood.
• “This is not about moms. This is about women prioritizing themselves so that they can have a lifelong experience of wellbeing.”
• Perimenopause, caregiving, career shifts: it’s about the stage, not the age.
• Flowspace focuses on destigmatizing menopause and spotlighting underused innovations in wellness.

(00:07:09) Finding Strength When You Have None to Spare

• Samantha admits: “All the healthy advice on stage? I don’t really do most of it because I’m running the business.”
• How “bathing in gratitude” with friendships fuels her resilience
• Being mindful about whether she’s mindful is her starting point.

(00:08:40) Impostor Phenomenon in the Boardroom

• Samantha challenges the term “impostor syndrome,” calling it a “societal phenomenon” instead.
• “In many rooms… the other eight people at the table don’t really want you there.”
• She overcomes self-doubt by preparing thoroughly, using handwritten cards as her power tool.
• Confidence is built through practice, movement, and strong community.

(00:11:52) Confidence Hacks & Micro-Workouts You’ll Actually Try

• Samantha swears by working out before big moments — even if it’s just a few jumping jacks.
• Her trick? “I put a set of weights on my kitchen counter… curl, press, curl, press.”
• Five squats every bathroom break. “You’ve got the trigger…it’s like cognitive behavioral therapy.”
• Can we change our behavior? “I literally publish a platform about making the time for ourselves and changing our behaviors to prioritize ourselves. And yet I don't do it.”

(00:18:56) What’s Next: Flowspace Expansion & Listening to Gen Z

• Flowspace is growing: hiring writers, editors, and building community events.
• SheMedia is evolving beyond parenting — investing in research around teens, AI, and identity.
• Their Gen Z Teen Council keeps them honest (and humble).
• “They’re like… that is a trend from like 11 years ago. And you're just finding out about it because you're middle-aged white ladies.”

Guest Resources:

• Follow Samantha on Instagram
• Get into the Flow Space
• Connect with SHEMedia
• Listen to her podcast, Finding Flow

If this episode moved you, please consider supporting The Big Silence Foundation and exploring our resources:

Connect with The Big Silence Community

• Order: The Big Silence Memoir audiobook
• Shop The Big Silence Self Love Collection
• Subscribe on YouTube
• Donate to The Big Silence Foundation

What if your lowest moment was the beginning of your greatest transformation?

In this powerhouse episode of The Big Silence, Karena sits down with six-time American Ninja Warrior, keynote speaker, and Pull-Up Revolution founder Angela Gargano. From tearing her ACL on national TV to moving into her dad’s basement and starting over, Angela’s story is the definition of a comeback. She opens up about identity, healing through movement, and what it really takes to feel strong, mentally and physically. Whether you’re chasing a fitness goal, struggling to find your purpose, or just trying to stay present, Angela’s wisdom will move you. Literally.

How do you rebuild your life when your identity no longer fits, and learn to love yourself beyond your achievements?

Stripping away external validation proves that strength isn’t just physical. It’s about emotional resilience and self-love.

(00:00) From Biochemist to Ninja Warrior: A Wild Career Pivot

• Angela’s unexpected leap from lab work to national television
• She originally had no clue what American Ninja Warrior was
• Her early fitness competition days with Cathy Savage — and how they shaped her confidence
• How being labeled “manly” for having muscles became a source of power, not shame

(08:00) Injury, Identity & Starting Over in Her Dad’s Basement

• The ACL tear that stopped her Ninja dreams — and forced a reckoning with self-worth
• Losing her gym, her career path, and her direction — but finding her mindset
• Why so many high achievers link love to accomplishments (and how to break that cycle)
• “I just didn’t even know who I was anymore” — Angela on redefining her purpose

(16:00) One Pull-Up Can Change Everything: The Birth of a Movement

• How helping Women’s Health editor Liz Plosser get her first pull-up sparked a revolution
• Why the pull-up became a metaphor for doing hard things — at any age
• Creating community and confidence through movement
• Angela’s advice for building your strength, one rep at a time

(20:00) Fitness Without the Finish Line: Training for Life, Not Just Competition

• What her workouts look like now — and why mini goals keep her motivated
• Angela’s tips for functional strength and long-term health
• Her approach to balance: strength training, yoga, and fun 
• Karena shares her 21-day system to stay accountable and avoid burnout

(25:00) Mental Health, Meditation & Getting Unstuck

• How moving your body and getting back to basics can pull you out of a rut
• Meditation and breathwork routines — and why they actually work
• Tips for navigating anxiety and sleepless nights 

(30:00) The New Rules of Wellness: Eat More, Lift More, Live Longer

• Why the fitness world is finally embracing protein, muscle, and rest
• The rise (and cost!) of Pilates — and Angela’s thoughts on biohacking
• What really works for longevity — and what’s just hype
• Why failure is just research, every mistake is a step forward

Guest Resources

• Follow Angela on Instagram
• Visit her website
• Listen to her podcast

If this episode moved you, please consider supporting The Big Silence Foundation and exploring our resources:

Connect with The Big Silence Community

• Order: The Big Silence Memoir audiobook
• Shop The Big Silence Self Love Collection
• Subscribe on YouTube
• Donate to The Big Silence Foundation

Pssst: Sign up for the Tone It Up Summer Sculpt Challenge (beginning July 14) and get access to 5 Days To Zen—an exclusive meditation series with Karena.

What happens when you confront your darkest moments and choose to heal, instead of staying stuck in the pain?

In this raw and inspiring episode of The Big Silence, Karena Dawn is joined by Dr. Samantha Harte, author of Breaking the Circuit. She’s a physical therapist, author, and sobriety advocate. Harte opens up about rebuilding her life after addiction and navigating a traumatic childhood. Through it all, she discovered the healing power of vulnerability and forgiveness, ultimately learning to rewire her brain and change her story.

Her picture-perfect high school existence masked unbearable pain, leading to a soul-shaking drug overdose. While navigating the challenges of sobriety in the midst of a crumbling marriage and painful loss, Samantha found herself at rock bottom. What came next was a radical reworking of her inner life and the birth of a new identity — one grounded in compassionate curiosity, revolutionary responsibility, and finally, self-forgiveness.

This conversation is a masterclass in what it means to confront your truths, rewire your mind, and write a new story — no matter how broken the past may seem.

How Do We Take Pain and Turn It Into Something Positive, Even Transformative?

Dr. Harte explains why healing begins with self-forgiveness — and how shame, silence, and perfectionism keep us stuck in destructive loops.  Learning to forgive, starting with yourself, is key to breaking free from toxic cycles.

(00:058) When Everything Looks Fine — But You’re Falling Apart Inside

• The internal divide between outward success and private suffering: “Straddling myself between these two worlds, these two identities, like everything is fine and nothing is ok.”
• A very ill-timed overdose that became a wake-up call
• The unbearable weight of feeling stuck with yourself when your inner voice becomes your fiercest critic

(00:10:04) Five Years Sober, Still Miserable: The Trap of White-Knuckling Recovery

• Perfectionism can doom sobriety: “It works until it doesn’t. Perfectionism collapses in matters of the heart.” 
• Her marriage collapses under the weight of unspoken resentment, infidelity, and untreated trauma.
• “All of those mechanisms that kept me safe as a girl were killing me as an adult.”

(00:18:30) Spiritual Rock Bottom: The Breakthrough Moment That Changed Everything

• How addiction takes hold, even when you’re convinced you have it under control
• Knowing when you’ve hit "spiritual rock bottom" and turning it into a catalyst for change
• Turning your deepest fears and pain into life-altering breakthroughs

(00:22:40) Compassionate Curiosity: The Self-Talk That Can Save Your Life

• Intercepting your inner critic with the triangle of compassionate curiosity and radical responsibility: “Why did I just do that?” and “What am I gonna do about it now?” 
• The parenting advice we all need: how apology clears shame and models emotional intelligence for your kids.

(00:31:30) Betrayal, Infidelity, and the Truth That Finally Came Out

• The loss of her sister and her declaration to write a book
• Becoming the “girl who 12-stepped the world.” Applying AA’s 12-step program to other aspects of life
• “The fear of any type of judgment absolutely collapsed.” Rising to the level of our goals and creating habits 

(00:31:30) Healing and Forgiveness: Can You Ever Forgive the Unforgivable?

• The struggle and importance of forgiving others (and yourself) in the healing process
• Why forgiving betrayal doesn’t mean condoning hurtful actions
• The spiritual and emotional liberation that comes with true forgiveness

(00:53:00) Rewiring the Mind: What It Really Means to Break the Circuit

• Samantha explains how trauma loops get locked into our bodies — and how to consciously rewire them.
• “Pain is a circuit breaker...I wish there was another way.” The necessity of pain on the path to change
• Through science, spirituality, and self-inquiry, anyone can change their story.

Guest Resources

• Follow Dr. Samantha Harte on Instagram 
• Order her book: Breaking the Circuit
• YouTube channel
• Facebook
• Book a discovery call or explore resources

Connect with The Big Silence Community

• Order: The Big Silence Memoir audiobook
• Shop The Big Silence Self Love Collection
• Subscribe on YouTube
• Donate to The Big Silence Foundation

What if you built a billion-dollar fitness empire — and then had the courage to tear it down for something better?

In this powerful episode of The Big Silence, Karena Dawn sits down with Carl Daikeler, founder of Beachbody (now known as BODi), the man behind household names like P90X, Insanity, Shakeology, and Morning Meltdown 100. But this isn’t just a story of success — it’s a brutally honest look at motivation, body image, entrepreneurship, and the daily mental work it takes to keep going when things get hard.

From growing up backstage in a Pennsylvania theater to running a global health brand with over a million users, Carl shares the emotional, mental, and spiritual tools that have kept him moving forward. You’ll hear about the behind-the-scenes challenges of rebranding from Beachbody to BODi, the surprising role Broadway played in his journey, and his no-BS take on fitness fads, GLP-1s, and tech obsession.

Are We Measuring Fitness Wrong?

Carl and Karena unpack the myths of the wellness industry — including why the best fitness “tech” is already inside you.

(00:01:50) The Birth of Beachbody: A Brand Built for People Who Hate Working Out

• Carl created Beachbody to help impatient, goal-oriented people get consistent without loving fitness.
• Success didn’t come from being a guru — it came from being a relatable customer.
• “Day one to day done”: Programs need structure, not endless motivation.
• Community was always the secret sauce: message boards before social media.

(00:09:30) From Infomercials to Shakeology to MLM: Lessons in Iteration

• P90X’s breakout success during the 2008 recession changed the game.
• Word-of-mouth became the strategy behind the multi-level model.
• “The customer who solves their lifestyle problem deserves the reward.”
• Carl defends the ethics and intent behind Beachbody’s direct sales shift — and why it had to evolve.

(00:15:43) GLP-1s, Obesity, and What the Industry Is Getting Wrong

• Carl’s stance: These meds are tools — but not solutions without resistance training and nutrition.
• “Lifestyle change is so hard… but if you can monetize your consistency? That’s powerful.”
• The secret pill culture from the ‘90s is back — but smarter wellness demands a full-picture approach.
• Fitness tech is great — until it overrides your intuition.

(00:18:46) Carl’s Morning Routine: Cold Plunges, Kefir & Spinach Shakes

• Wake-up time: ~5–6 AM, no alarm.
• Lemon water + ginger + olive oil + kefir shot = ritual jumpstart.
• 3.5-minute cold plunge followed by a 45-min workout.
• Weekend DIY meal prep keeps him on track — and surprisingly, he hates vegetables.

(00:24:00) The Power of Persistence: What’s Made Him Relentless

• “It’s about the objective — even if it's just influencing one person.”
• Reads company case studies and biographies to stay grounded.
• Avoids victim mindset: “Self-pity invites fear, and fear kills creativity.”
• Expansion, not perfection, keeps him engaged after 27 years.

(00:28:34) Why He Changed “Beachbody” to “BODi” — And Faced the Backlash

• Beachbody = outdated ideals; BODi = well-being and “health esteem.
• Carl wanted his kids to grow up with a healthier message around body image.
• Despite board resistance, he pushed the rebrand through for long-term values.
• “Do I want to be known for six-pack abs… or for helping people love themselves enough to take care of themselves?”

 (00:33:32) Where Fitness Needs to Go: Simple, Sustainable, and Human

• Community > wearables: “I don’t need a device to tell me I’m anxious — I already know.”
• Walking after dinner: a game-changing practice for mental and physical well-being
• Gravity is free. So is listening to your body.

Guest Resources

• Visit BODi.com
• Follow Carl Daikeler on Instagram
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/daikeler-carl/

If this episode moved you, please consider supporting The Big Silence Foundation and exploring our resources:

Connect with The Big Silence Community

• Order: The Big Silence Memoir audiobook
• Shop The Big Silence Self Love Collection
• Subscribe on YouTube
• Donate to The Big Silence Foundation

What if your anxiety is actually your soul speaking to you? In this episode of The Big Silence, Karena reunites with longtime friends and Almost 30 podcast co-founders Krista Williams and Lindsey Simcik to talk about life transitions, healing burnout, and the emotional power of their first book. From learning to listen to your intuition to rewriting generational body image beliefs, these two best friends open up about the lessons they wish they knew in their late 20s. With 120M+ downloads and a thriving global community, Almost 30 is a cultural phenomenon — and this conversation is a heart-expanding, soul-grounding glimpse into the wisdom behind it.

How Do You Know If You’re Burnt Out or Just Overwhelmed?

Krista and Lindsey share the unspoken signs of burnout — and the practices that helped them break the loop of over-functioning and inner criticism.

(00:00:00) Writing the Book That Didn’t Exist When They Were 29

• The Almost 30 book began as a guide for the women they once were: overwhelmed, uncertain, and hungry for more.
• Their Saturn Returns brought identity shifts, career pivots, and deep self-questioning.
• “No one prepares you for this phase of life — and we wanted to change that.”

(00:06:10) The Truth About Intuition and Why We Don’t Always Trust It

• “Your soul already knows the answer. But the noise of life drowns it out.”
• Quiet, prayer, journaling, and time off social media are keys to tuning back in.
• Anxiety often signals you're ignoring what your soul is trying to say.

(00:10:00) Understanding Burnout as a Mind-Body Loop

• Burnout can look like pushing, people-pleasing, and low-level anxiety you can’t shake.
• Their reframes: the inner critic becomes the inner coach; rest isn’t failure, it’s fuel.
• “If you keep pushing energy out, there’s no room for any to come back in.”

How Do We Heal the Body Image Stories We Inherited?

They get real about food shame, generational trauma, and how women can reclaim their bodies — not as objects, but as intuitive allies.

(00:21:30) Rewriting Generational Patterns Around Body and Worth

• Krista shares how her mother’s diet obsession shaped her secret eating disorder.
• Lindsey describes numbing through overworking, overexercising, and overgiving.
• “We learned to hate our bodies before we learned to love ourselves.”

(00:25:00) Body as Compass: What It Means to Truly Be in Your Body

• The body gives you signs — a tight chest, a headache, a gut feeling — and we ignore them at our own risk.
• “My body was trying to tell me I was in the wrong life. But I was too anxious to hear it.”

How Can Friendships Survive Growth, Grief, and Glow-Ups?

After a decade of building a business together, Krista and Lindsey get raw about friendship contracts, trust issues, and the hard work behind staying connected.

(00:38:00) Friendship in Transition: Divorce, Babies, and Bicoastal Life

• They explore the myth that friendships shouldn’t change — and why letting go is sometimes the most loving act.
• Their tools: therapy, coaching, and “clearing conversations.”
• “Our connection is the foundation of the podcast. But we had to fight for it.”

(00:41:45) Letting People Evolve Without Expecting Them to Stay the Same

• Real friendship means looser grip, fewer expectations, and more grace.
• “Your life doesn’t begin on the other side of a perfect relationship, job, or weight. It begins when you trust yourself.”

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Guest Resources & Links:

• Order the Almost 30 Book
• Listen to the Almost 30 Podcast
• Follow @itskrista & @lindseysimcik
• Morning Microdose – Daily Podcast

Connect with The Big Silence Community

• Order: The Big Silence Memoir audiobook
• Shop The Big Silence Self Love Collection
• Subscribe on YouTube
• Donate to The Big Silence Foundation