What happens to the brain and body of a wife who discovers her husband's relationship with porn? This is part 1 of our 2 part series on the trauma of sexual betrayal taught by Dr. Barbara Steffens and Lyschel Burket. You'll learn why wives react the way they do, how to tell the difference between wives expressing anger vs. engaging in abusive behavior, how to set appropriate boundaries while practicing empathy, and what wives really want from their husbands in the healing process (VOWS). This teaching is absolutely brilliant. Take notes!

Dr. Barbara Steffens is the founding president of APSATS, the Association of Partners of Sex Addicts Trauma Specialists. She has specialized in providing help for the partners of sexual addicts since 1999. Dr. Steffens is a recognized expert in the field, and is now accepting speaking engagements for churches and professional organizations. Learn more and connect with Barb at drbarbarasteffens.com

Buy Barb's book (this is a paid link):
Your Sexually Addicted Spouse: How Partners Can Cope and Heal

Lyschel Burket is the Lead Hope Caster and Founder of Hope Redefined. She is also a current APSATS Board Member and the committee lead for BTRL (Betrayal Trauma Religious Leader Training). Lyschel has been working with women since 2008 by helping them navigate the road of betrayal by sexual infidelity. She knows all too well the isolation, shame, fear, and trauma that betrayal causes. More than anything, Lyschel wants women to know that they don’t have to walk this road alone, so she provides a safe community where each one can find healing and hope.

Learn more about Lyschel and Hope Redefined at hoperedefined.org

More resources for women from Hope Redefined:

• private online community
• online support groups
• intensive retreats
• 1:1 coaching

Listen to the Hope For Wives podcast at hopeforwives.com!

Get trained by Dr. Barbara Steffens and Lyschel Burket through BTRL (Betrayal Trauma Religious Leader Training). Learn more here.

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Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

Through the story of Philip and the Ethiopian eunuch, you'll hear how Jesus heals sexual shame, childhood trauma, systemic injustice, and the agonizing experience of being excluded and emasculated. If I could sum it up in two words: you belong!

This sermon was originally preached on Sunday, September 9, 2024 at the Husband Material Retreat in Colorado. Sign up to be notified about the 2025 retreat here.

Watch the video here.

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

We all experience sexual attraction differently (SSA, OSA, etc). In this episode, we explore the benefits, challenges, and limitations of forming deep friendships with men who experience different types of sexual attraction.

Drew Boa is the founder of Husband Material. Email Drew at husbandmaterial.com/drew

Henry Brown is the Director Of Operations & Support at HM. Email Henry at [email protected].

Jason Pidcock is a trauma-informed recovery coach and HM Community Member. Learn more at jasonpidcockcoaching.com.

Jordan Castille is a board-certified Christian counselor and Certified HM Coach. Learn more at castillecoaching.com.

Mentioned in this episode:

• How To Escape A Creepy Conversation Before Sexting
• Appropriate Nudity Between Men (LIVE)

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

How do you view men who experience same-sex attraction (SSA)? In this episode, Jordan Castille and Drew Boa deconstruct 10 stereotypes about men who are sexually attracted to men.

Jordan Castille is a Board Certified Christian Counselor, Certified Clinical Sex Addiction Specialist, APSATS CPC (Certified Partner Coach) - Candidate, and Certified Husband Material Coach. He and his wife Cherise have two boys. Jordan loves Jesus, people, video games, working out, Tex-Mex, learning how to fix things, legos, and his church community. Jordan also does one-on-one coaching and small group coaching within the Husband Material Community. He is trained with partner betrayal sensitivity through the APSATS organization.

https://www.castillecoaching.com
Book a Call
Email: [email protected] 

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

How do you view men who experience opposite-sex attraction (OSA)? In this episode, Jason Pidcock and Drew Boa deconstruct 10 stereotypes about men who are sexually attracted to women.

Jason Pidcock is a Certified Trauma Informed Recovery Coach and longtime member of the Husband Material community. Jason is passionate about helping men overcome the coping strategies they have developed that are no longer serving them well. After finding much healing from his own story of spiritual abuse and pornography addiction, he is transitioning from a career as a construction contractor to working full-time as a coach helping other men find their path to wholeness.

Reach out to Jason here…
Website: Www.jasonpidcockcoaching.com
Email: [email protected]

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

If you've spent years wishing your sexual thoughts and feelings would go away, this episode is for you. 

Related resources:

• Unwanted, by Jay Stringer (paid link)
• How To Interpret Sexual Fantasies
• How To Analyze Sexual Fantasies
• Why We Sexualize Emotions...And How To Desexualize Them

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

Have you ever felt unable to enter into your wife's pain? In this episode, Nathaniel Gustafson explains how to come close to your wife in a way she is more likely to trust. You'll learn how to stay out of shame, keep the spotlight on her, and practice these skills before "game time." Sobriety is not enough. You must learn empathy. Nathaniel's compassionate guidance will help you develop it.

Watch the video of this episode here.

Nathaniel Gustafson is a licensed professional counselor and ordained pastor who specializes in working with men and couples recovering from pornography and affairs. Nathaniel also offers monthly webinars alongside his wife, Tammy.

Learn more about Nathaniel at tenderheartedmen.com

Join Nathaniel's next Know Your Why Workshop in October!

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

Many men have been wounded by women. In this episode, Britta Eskey explains how women can help men heal wounds caused by women. Without women, we are missing half of humanity.

Britta Eskey co-founded COR, which assists people in finding and living their purpose, including through the Noble Man workshop. Britta is the author of Initiations in Love, a spiritual memoir which answers the age old question: “What do we do with our pain?” Britta has a background in social work, family therapy, counseling, family constellation work, dance and movement, spiritual direction, and life coaching. Britta is a NeuroAffective Relational Model (NARM) trauma-informed professional and a certified Compassion Cultivation Teacher. She lives in Asheville, North Carolina, with her husband, Lee Eskey, and their dog, Heidi.

Explore Britta's work at corexperience.com

Buy Britta's book: Initiations in Love: A Memoir (paid link)

Learn more about The Noble Man Workshop at corexperience.com/nobleman

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

Did you know that you have more than one inner child? In this episode, you'll get to know three types of unhealed boys within you. Then at the end, I'll share what it looks like to help them heal.

You'll meet:

• The "good boy" who became "the hero."
• The "bad boy" who became "the villain."
• The "hurt boy" who became "the victim."

Related episodes:

• Porn And The Inner Child
• The Inner Child Challenge
• How To Heal Your Inner Child
• Find The Boy Within The Man
• Four Ways To Reparent Yourself

Support the show

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

How can I communicate better with members of the opposite sex? What words and phrases can I use? Certified Sex Addiction Therapist Sulonda Smith shares insights and ideas rooted in biology, neuroscience, and 30 years of experience helping men relate to women.

Sulonda Smith is an author, coach, speaker, and CSAT (Certified Sex Addiction Therapist) known as "The Communications Ninja." Her mission is to show men in relationships with women how to decode, understand, and communicate with her to gain more respect, trust, and appreciation. Learn more at sulondasmith.com

Take the Husband Material Journey...

• Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube
• Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community
• Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn
• Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy

Thanks for listening!

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HMA is open! Join now at joinHMA.com
The doors will close on Sunday, July 21.
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