You have been a great source of narcissistic supply, but you finally figured out that you have been dealing with a narcissist.  When they realize that you see this, there will be backlash.  That is because they know that they will be unable to fool you anymore and won’t be able to continue their narcissistic supply from you.  You are now interfering with their addiction, which is the supply of attention, admiration, power and control that you gave them.  They will be in withdrawal.  You might see a no gap transition, meaning they will quickly find another source of supply, maybe immediately into another relationship to stabilize their inner world.  You will also see narcissistic rage, which looks completely unfamiliar and like pure evil.  Look out for smear campaigns, verbal, emotional, mental and even possibly physical abuse, and of course, the victim mentality.

Shame is at the core of dependency and codependency.  After spending time with a person who has toxic or manipulative behaviors, we begin to internalize their subtle and sometimes not so subtle messages about ourselves.  This can cause an underlying sense of shame.  Shame is an inner experience of feeling unwanted, worthless, or rejected.  When we’re burdened with shame, we want to attach to something or someone else to get away from ourselves.  When we have a deep belief that we’re not good enough, we go to great measures to avoid that feeling.  This episode looks at the connection between codependency, toxic behaviors and shame, as well as the healing process of working through shame.

After being involved with a narcissist, it takes some healing to get back to the feeling of who we were before the relationship, or before the damage to the psyche.  Victims of narcissistic or toxic abuse end up wondering what happened to their former selves.  They might remember being more independent, more vivacious, more outgoing.  Or maybe they feel a decrease in their creativity and passion.  

The journey back to the soul is the most difficult but the single most important part of the healing process.  It is painful because it requires us to feel the feelings that the protective part of the brain has been hiding and locking away from our conscious mind in order to protect us from the pain of mistreatment and abuse.  This episode offers guidance on returning to your true self.  We need to be true to ourselves and allow the essence of our soul to be fully experienced and expressed in order to live the life we were meant to live.  

For more information please visit: www.InnerSourceTherapy.com

This episode is about the defense against the energy-vampire.  Being around a toxic person is exhausting.  Why do we end up feeling drained with them?  If you are with a narcissist, or someone with toxic behaviors, you probably feel tired or drained most of the time.  This episode reveals some of the signs that you may be at risk of losing your energy to a narcissist, which may lead to a feeling of disconnection.  We also look at how to begin rebuilding your energy and stopping the drain.  For more information please visit:  www.InnerSourceTherapy.com

Trying to reason with a narcissist is like beating your head against a wall.  Trying to reason with a narcissist or person with toxic behaviors is like beating your head against a wall.  This episode will explore the dynamics of trying to reason with the unreasonable and why we keep doing it.  We look at the red flags of when we are being subtly sucked into an energy bond of impossible rationality.  We can only stop the madness if we are aware of it.  Once we begin to see the tactics used and the reasons behind why narcissists intentionally engage in illogical debate we can actively disengage from arguments without feeling like we need to prove anything, or make them see our perspective.  

For more information or to contact me please visit www.InnerSourceTherapy.com

Addiction is a form of attachment.  We can be as addicted to a toxic person as we can to a toxic substance.  This episode will explore the hows, whys and whats of trauma bonding.  Find out why it statistically takes an average of 10 years to leave an abusive relationship.  Recognize the signs that you are in a trauma bond.  Identify the path to heal trauma bonding during and after a toxic relationship.

For more information or to contact me please visit www.InnerSourceTherapy.com

In this episode I wanted to explore one of the questions I hear frequently and used to struggle with myself.  That is, “Did they intentionally do that or was that an accident?” Sometimes people with toxic behaviors are expertly covert and can manipulate while seeming like they just don’t know better, or that it was just a misunderstanding.  This can cause a lot of confusion because it keeps you in the dark, makes you question your own reality and has a way of making you feel crazy.  Learn to trust your instincts.  In this episode I talk about things to look for that can help clear up some of the confusion.   Toxic people like to keep you in a state of confusion because it makes it easier for you to accept the responsibility for their behaviors.  Stop guessing and second questioning yourself.  Learn some of the signs to help you recognize when their behaviors are actually intentional manipulative tactics. 

www.InnerSourceTherapy.com