Robyn Malcolm is one of New Zealand's most beloved actors. And at 61, she is, by her own account, having the time of her life. In this kōrero, Petra sits down with Robyn who’s beaming in from Glasgow, while watching squirrels in the park, writing a new project with After the Party collaborator Diane Taylor, and settling into a life that looks nothing like the one she'd have planned, and everything like the one she was always meant to live.

This is a conversation that goes everywhere and earns every turn. Robyn and Petra talk about what it actually feels like to arrive at 60, the falling-over-less-scared-of-it, the inhabiting-your-own-space, the finding-it-funnier quality of a life that has already survived its worst moments. 

Robyn talks about aging in an industry obsessed with youth, the Mar-a-Lago face appearing on actresses she admires, and why aspirational casting is, in her view, utterly false, because what women actually want to see on screen is themselves.

They get into Robyn's late ADHD diagnosis, sparked, she says, by a Grey Areas episode, and the Rubik's Cube moment when everything she'd been told about herself clicked into place. The laziness, the avoidance, the "imagine what you could've done if you'd done some work" rewritten, at last, through a kinder and more accurate lens.

The conversation moves into menopause, sexuality, and shame. And Robyn speaks openly about the documentary she's been making all around Aotearoa on menopause and mental health, including a revelation about the relationship between estrogen loss and mental health that she says astounded her. She talks about why women won't discuss sex in groups until someone goes first, why shame is the real barrier to desire in midlife, and what happened when she brought a model of the clitoris to a room full of Southland women at the Shepherdess's Muster.

Warm, wide-ranging, laugh-out-loud funny, and quietly profound, this one is a delight from start to finish.

Support the show: greyareas.nz/support 

Song credit: Korimako, Performed by Aro, Written by Emily Looker and Charles Looker and published by Songbroker.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices