Most HSPs think they're being assertive when they're still stuck in passivity or passive aggression that feels icky. Until my thirties, invisibility was my whole strategy, gold medal people pleaser, total Gumby for whatever anybody wanted. Growing up in dysfunction taught me to keep peace, avoid shame, never rock boats, and my nervous system still confuses distance with actual danger by filling gaps with zero evidence. Real assertiveness interrupts all that projecting our past onto new people, it says I will state my reality and see what happens instead of mind reading or assuming. Passivity just gathers resentment while passive aggression creates confusion, but assertiveness? It gathers clarity. Light and love.

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