Lit AF Relationships

On today’s episode I talk about the patterns behind why you’re partner gets defensive. The reason they get defensive is because of their attachment style. Our attachment styles show us how we related to others and what strategies we use to keep ourselves safe in relationships. It is possible to change your attachment style. And it’s also possible to help your partner become more secure by showing up securely in the relationship. In this episode I share about the common patterns that dismissive avoidants experience. I also share how you can help them show up more securely. 

If you’re interested in ending old relationship patterns like people-pleasing or codependency book a free discovery call to learn if my relationship and communication 1:1 coaching program is the right fit for you. Click here to book a free discovery call: https://calendly.com/hello-3224/getting-to-secure-consult-call

Follow Lit AF on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

This week on Lit AF I share common relationship patterns for the fearful avoidant attachment type. Attachment styles help us understand common relationship patterns that keep repeating. You might think that breaking up with someone will fix the problems only to get into a new relationship with the same issues. I’ve totally been there. It’s confusing and super annoying. But understanding your attachment style can help you create new strategies to relate to people confidently and honestly. Trust me you’re not broken. I’m this episode I talk about the patterns behind the fearful avoidant. They have a huge fear of betrayal and often struggle with an internal or external feeling of chaos. Their go to emotion is anger and can use that to set boundaries from a reactionary place. 

If this resonates with you and you’re interested in creating confident and rock solid relationships book a free discord call here: https://calendly.com/hello-3224/getting-to-secure-consult-call

Follow Lit AF on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

On this week’s episode I break down how to hack your life if you’re feeling lonely or going through a breakup. Let’s be real, breakups suck and loneliness can really consume your life. But there are some easy ways to trick your brain into getting your core needs met so you feel like you’re still receiving the benefits of a romantic partner or relationship. The amazing thing with this work is that your meeting your needs on your own. These hacks will also help you heal from a breakup faster. Tune in to start feeling better!

Interested in ending old relationship patterns and communicating better? Setup a free discovery call to learn how you can change your relationships this year. Book a free discovery call here: https://calendly.com/hello-3224/getting-to-secure-consult-call

Follow Lit AF on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

Resources Discussed:

In My Non-Expert Opinion podcast episode with Sarah Cohan: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ep-205-repeating-old-patterns-with-new-partners/id1309417352?i=1000625236346

On today’s episode I talk about my issues with the book Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel S.F. Heller. I should start by saying I do think there are some positives about this book. But when I first opened it years ago I was very triggered by it and it took me a while to pick it back up. I share about why the book was triggering to me and some of its big misses. I believe its written quite well for one specific attachment style and leaves out the others. Listen today to learn more about why this popular book might not be the best attachment literature for you.

Follow Lit AF on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

Are you interested in creating authentic, strong, and mushy-gushy relationships? Book a free discovery call to see if this 1:1 coaching program is the right fit for you. Book your discovery call here: https://calendly.com/hello-3224/getting-to-secure-consult-call

On this week’s episode I share why working with the body is important to healing your attachment style. The body is a great temperature gauge for what is going on in our brain. Feeling emotions is a uniquely human experience. And most insecure attachment types work really hard to avoid emotions as much as possible. In this episode I share how to start to get in touch with your emotions and build a language to describe them in your body. As with all things healing it’s not easy and it can be really awkward to start. But trust me we are all starting from a similar place. Tune into to learn more about the importance of incorporating somatic bodywork into your healing journey.

If you’re interested in creating secure relationships book a free discovery call to see if my 1:1 coaching program is the right fit for you using this link: https://calendly.com/hello-3224/getting-to-secure-consult-call

Follow Lit AF on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

On this week’s episode I talk about the important role of spirituality in healing your attachment style. In this episode I share about the difference between religion and spirituality. I define ways to connect with your spiritual practice. And I encourage you to make your spiritual practice uniquely yours. There are many benefits to a spiritual practice including tapping into an infinite resource of love, support, and connection. I then share about my own spiritual practice and the many different modalities I use including tarot, astrology, and the changing of the seasons. It’s woo and wildly witchy. I hope you enjoy!

Interested in creating secure attachment? Book a free discovery call to find out how to show up confidently and authentically in all of your relationships. Discovery call link: https://calendly.com/hello-3224/getting-to-secure-consult-call

Follow Lit AF on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

On today’s episode I examine the different attachment styles that play out in Ultimatum: Queer Love on Netflix. I evaluate each of the attachment styles of the characters in the show and explain the mechanics of their relationships at play. It’s fun. It’s spicy. And watching the relationships in the show helps us understand each of the attachment styles in a deeper way. I finish by talking about the overall premise of the show and whether or not ultimates actually work. 

Follow Lit AF on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in working through people pleasing to show up authentically in relationship book a discovery call here: https://calendly.com/hello-3224/getting-to-secure-consult-call

Want to show up securely today? Download these free scripts to use in conflict. They will help you show up vulnerably and secure. Free secure scripts: https://www.sarahcohan.com/freetools

Today on the show I talk about the relationship between money and attachment styles. I share how each attachment style relates to money. Whether your fearful avoidant, anxious preoccupied, dismissive avoidant, or secure you definitely have a relationship to money. Attachment is one of the many influencies and factors on your relationship to money. I share why money is such an intense and difficult topic and a few resources to start healing your relationship to it.

Do you want to create secure attachment with money, time, and other humans? Book a free discovery call to see if my 1:1 coaching program is for you. Link to book a discovery call: https://calendly.com/hello-3224/getting-to-secure-consult-call

Follow Lit AF on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

In today’s episode I talk about why you have sworn off dating. I go into each of the attachment styles anxious preoccupied, dismissive avoidant, fearful avoidant, and secure to talk about how each of them arrive to this important stage of healing. Believe it or not swearing off dating is a huge part of healing. I just don’t want you to get stuck on this stage. I finish the episode sharing a few tips about how to start to think about dating again and approach online dating in a secure way including what app to use and how to prepare for a date.

I’d love to work with you to create secure romantic relationships. Schedule a free discovery call to see if my 1:1 coaching program is the right fit for you. Link to call:  https://calendly.com/hello-3224/getting-to-secure-consult-call

Follow Lit AF on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

Download free scripts for difficult conversations: https://www.sarahcohan.com/freetools

On today’s episode I talk with my recent client, Chelsea Riffe, about healing her anxious attachment style. We talk about her journey to secure attachment where she is now practicing understanding and meeting her needs on a daily basis. We cover so many topics including how to approach fear of rejection, ending relationships that aren’t the right fit quicker, overcoming the feeling of being too much, scripts for having hard conversations, sharing expectations in situationships and casual relationships, what to do when you think people are out of your league, and how to get over your ex faster. Chelsea shares honestly and vulnerably how to heal this attachment style. I hope this episode helps you on your journey to secure.

I help folks that are struggling with people pleasing to show up confidently and vulnerably in relationships. Book a free discovery call to see if this 1:1 coaching program is the right fit for you. 

Visit Chelsea’s website: www.chelseariffe.com | Mic Drop, The Ultimate Podcast | Launch Course | 1:1 Coaching

Listen to Chelsea’s podcast: In My Non-Expert Opinion - Spotify

Follow Lit AF on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

Resources Discussed:

Chelsea Riffe on Lit AF podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/65-manifesting-an-eat-pray-love-adventure-with/id1515162031?i=1000541337105