How you show up for yourself determines how you experience your child's addiction. We aren't wired to be happy all the time. Struggling is inevitable and it's normal. There's wisdom in all our emotions, even the most difficult ones. We need to honor all the feelings that our life circumstances are triggering. Struggling well gives us new perspective so we don't get stuck in apathy. When we embrace the growth and change that our struggle is showing us we can grow and move forward through trying and even traumatic events.   

Guest Andrea Seydel and I  discussed:

Honoring where you are in your individual journey

Struggling well looks different at different times in your life

How we struggle well and build resilience in the process

The 5 steps to struggling well

What to listen to next:

Episode 37 Post Traumatic Growth 

Episode 38 How to Have Self Compassion

Episode 06 Your Words Create Your Quality of Life 

Watch the YouTube video of the interview for episode 48

Watch the YouTube Video Andrea and I made last year about struggling well 

If you want coaching about your child's addiction or anything else Sign up for a 45 minute $17 call with me using the link below

https://heatherrosscoachingcalendar.as.me/RoadtoRecovery

For additional resources:

Sign up for my free guide 3 Steps To Stay Sane When Your Child Is Struggling with Addiction - How to Move Forward With Confidence TODAY

http://heatherrosscoaching.com/3-simple-steps/

Follow me on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/heatherrosscoaching

Follow me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/heatherrosscoaching/

Join the free Facebook group for parents who are struggling with a child's addiction

Andrea Seydel is the Author of the book and host of the podcast Saving You Is Killing Me We Loving Someone With An Addiction.

Andrea's website https://www.andreaseydel.com/

Saving You Is Killing Me Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-saving-you-is-killing-me-loving-someone-with/id1549250469

Saving You Is Killing Me Book https://www.amazon.com/Saving-You-Killing-Me-Addiction-ebook/dp/B08SR5WLYX

Healing starts for us when we connect with other parents like us to hear their stories and share our experiences.  When we do that we're no longer alone on this journey. Meeting and engaging with other parents gives us access to insights and resources we need. When we get the support we need, we find the safety and strength to accept ourselves and our children as we are in this moment. That's why my guest Casie Fariello is one of the founders of a new online support community called Other Parents Like Me (OPLM). In this episode we discuss:

How connection is the key to hope, help, and healing

Supporting more than one child with addiction or other challenges

Our first experiences with joining a support community and what we got out of it

Rebuilding a family after addiction 

The importance of taking everything you learn about addiction, making it your own, and choosing what you want to implement in your life

The wonderful experiences we've had being a part of OPLM

Watch the video of the interview on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fkp0f5AA3zw&feature=youtu.be

If you want coaching about your child's addiction or anything else Sign up for a 45 minute $17 call with me using the link below

https://heatherrosscoachingcalendar.as.me/RoadtoRecovery

For additional resources:

Sign up for my free guide 3 Steps To Stay Sane When Your Child Is Struggling with Addiction - How to Move Forward With Confidence TODAY

http://heatherrosscoaching.com/3-simple-steps/

Follow me on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/heatherrosscoaching

Follow me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/heatherrosscoaching/

Link to my free Facebook group for parents who are struggling with a child's addiction

https://www.facebook.com/groups/434135437166166/?ref=share

Join OPLM and get a free 7 day trial:

https://oplm.com/join/

Follow OPLM on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/other.parents.like.me

Follow OPLM on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/other.parents.like.me/

There’s a gap between what we expect in life and what we’re experiencing. In that gap is a loss. As parents we have hope and expectations. We expect a fulfilling relationship with our kids, family gatherings, milestones like prom and college, and we expect being a parent to feel good.  When addiction shows up we experience the painful gap between what we expect and our reality. We have to grieve those losses so we can let go of what we expected. We can stop wishing the past were different and focus on what we can intentionally create in the future.

In this episode Grief coach Julie Cluff and I discuss:

· Discounting and comparing losses

· We should only compare the impact of our own losses

· What misplaced guilt is and how it affects you

· Finding forgiveness in grief

· Our experiences can be hard and also possible to move through

· We can grieve gently

· The only way to heal from trauma is to choose the empowerment of change

· You don’t have to carry grief the rest of your life

If you want coaching about your child's addiction or anything else Sign up for a 45 minute $17 call with me using the link below

https://heatherrosscoachingcalendar.as.me/RoadtoRecovery

For additional resources:

Sign up for my free guide 3 Steps To Stay Sane When Your Child Is Struggling with Addiction - How to Move Forward With Confidence TODAY

http://heatherrosscoaching.com/3-simple-steps/

GROUP COACHING PROGRAM – Join the waitlist – New Group Starting soon! Be the first to get details. https://heatherrosscoaching.com/peace-of-mind-community/

Follow me on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/heatherrosscoaching

Follow me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/heatherrosscoaching/

Link to my free Facebook group for parents who are struggling with a child's addiction

https://www.facebook.com/groups/434135437166166/?ref=share

Contact Julie Cluff:

website: buildalifeafterloss.com

free webinar: buildalifeafterloss.com/gift

facebook: Build a Life After Loss with Julie Cluff https://www.facebook.com/buildalifeafterloss

instagram: @buildalifeafterloss

This is the hardest episode I've ever recorded and also the most important episode I ever recorded.

There's no way I can move forward helping other parents without stopping to honor Helanna's life and what her time on this earth gave to me.

This podcast wouldn't exist without her.

I wouldn't be who I am today without her.

The day that Helanna died I started wondering if I could continue my work helping other parents with their child’s addiction.

I didn’t know if I could face it anymore.

I wanted to hear Helanna’s voice and be close to her somehow, so I listened to the podcast episodes she was on & I realized that it was more important than ever for me to keep doing this work.

Having a child struggling with addiction is the hardest thing some parents will ever face.

Until I lost Helanna to fentanyl poisoning, her addiction has had more of a long-lasting impact on my life more than anything else.

So many parents are struggling alone and in silence because of shame and the stigma that goes with addiction.

There’s no way that I can step aside and not continue helping those parents.

Right now, that’s what is keeping me motivated to live a life that doesn’t include my daughter.

In this episode I share some of the things that I learned while dealing with her addiction and how they’re helping with my grief as well:

Link to the episode that explains the model:

https://anchor.fm/heather-ross9/episodes/Episode-16-The-Self-Coaching-Model-eref06

If you want coaching about your child's addiction or anything else Sign up for a 45 minute $17 call with me using the link below

https://heatherrosscoachingcalendar.as.me/RoadtoRecovery

For additional resources:

Sign up for my free guide 3 Steps To Stay Sane When Your Child Is Struggling with Addiction - How to Move Forward With Confidence TODAY

http://heatherrosscoaching.com/3-simple-steps/

GROUP COACHING PROGRAM –  Peace of Mind Group for moms
https://heatherrosscoaching.com/peace-of-mind-community/

Follow me on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/heatherrosscoaching

Follow me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/heatherrosscoaching/

Link to my free Facebook group for parents who are struggling with a child's addiction

https://www.facebook.com/groups/434135437166166/?ref=share

Your thoughts create your reality. One poisonous thought can cause you a lot of unnecessary pain.  It can be the difference between discomfort and great suffering.  Recently I realized I had one thought about my future that was draining my creativity, making me feel like I had a limited time to enjoy myself, and it was setting me up to create a bad experience when I have the ability to create a really positive experience. 

Link to the episode that explains the model:

https://anchor.fm/heather-ross9/episodes/Episode-16-The-Self-Coaching-Model-eref06

If you want coaching about your child's addiction or anything else Sign up for a 45 minute $17 call with me using the link below

https://heatherrosscoachingcalendar.as.me/RoadtoRecovery

For additional resources:

GROUP COACHING PROGRAM –  Peace of Mind Group for moms
https://heatherrosscoaching.com/peace-of-mind-community/

Sign up for my free guide 3 Steps To Stay Sane When Your Child Is Struggling with Addiction - How to Move Forward With Confidence TODAY

http://heatherrosscoaching.com/3-simple-steps/

Follow me on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/heatherrosscoaching

Follow me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/heatherrosscoaching/

Link to my free Facebook group for parents who are struggling with a child's addiction

https://www.facebook.com/groups/434135437166166/?ref=share

We had some great questions come up after my first interview with Helanna (episode 41) so did a second interview. 

We discussed:

Suboxone - how it helped - what she wishes she knew before she started using it - why she tapered off it.

How I handled her getting off suboxone.

Fears about losing her sobriety.

What her brain says about why being sober won't work.

How she knew she would use drugs from a young age.

Why she didn't trust me for a long time and what made her start trusting me again.

What made her decide to go to sober living this time when she wouldn't go other times.

How a shift in perspective about parenting can help your child and your relationship with them. 

If you want coaching about your child's addiction or anything else Sign up for a 45 minute $17 call with me using the link below

https://heatherrosscoachingcalendar.as.me/RoadtoRecovery

For additional resources:

Sign up for my free guide 3 Steps To Stay Sane When Your Child Is Struggling with Addiction - How to Move Forward With Confidence TODAY

http://heatherrosscoaching.com/3-simple-steps/

Follow me on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/heatherrosscoaching

Follow me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/heatherrosscoaching/

Link to my free Facebook group for parents who are struggling with a child's addiction

https://www.facebook.com/groups/434135437166166/?ref=share

Healing your own emotional wounds is where the magic is when it comes to your child’s addiction. We’re all responsible for our own healing just like we want our kids to be. When you’re reactive no matter how hard you try not to be, then your child is triggering an emotional wound. The worst part about emotional wounds is we recreate them over and over again with our perception. We all want love, acceptance, and connection but the rejection wound keeps us from getting it. Today I give you 3 steps to heal the rejection wound. 

Episodes I mention:

https://anchor.fm/heather-ross9/episodes/Episode-16-The-Self-Coaching-Model-eref06

https://anchor.fm/heather-ross9/episodes/Episode-2-How-To-Connect-With-Your-Child-Thats-Struggling-With-Addiction-en5fgd

https://anchor.fm/heather-ross9/episodes/Episode-24-Mastering-Your-Response-To-Your-Childs-Addiction-evtoh7

If you want coaching about your child's addiction or anything else Sign up for a 45 minute $17 call with me using the link below

https://heatherrosscoachingcalendar.as.me/RoadtoRecovery

For additional resources:

Sign up for my free guide 3 Steps To Stay Sane When Your Child Is Struggling with Addiction - How to Move Forward With Confidence TODAY

http://heatherrosscoaching.com/3-simple-steps/

Follow me on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/heatherrosscoaching

Follow me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/heatherrosscoaching/

Link to my free Facebook group for parents who are struggling with a child's addiction

https://www.facebook.com/groups/434135437166166/?ref=share

When you argue with reality you lose, but only 100% of the time - Byron Katie

When you accept reality, your options are limitless - Heather Ross

Your child's addiction can leave you feeling limited and hopeless. There are always more options than your brain is offering you.  In this episode I walk you through moving beyond resistance into solutions.

I mentioned tapping in the podcast today.  Here's a link that explains what it is:

https://www.webmd.com/balance/what-is-eft-tapping

If you want coaching about your child's addiction or anything else Sign up for a 45 minute $17 call with me using the link below

https://heatherrosscoachingcalendar.as.me/RoadtoRecovery

For additional resources:

Sign up for my free guide 3 Steps To Stay Sane When Your Child Is Struggling with Addiction - How to Move Forward With Confidence TODAY

http://heatherrosscoaching.com/3-simple-steps/

Follow me on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/heatherrosscoaching

Follow me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/heatherrosscoaching/

Link to my free Facebook group for parents who are struggling with a child's addiction

https://www.facebook.com/groups/434135437166166/?ref=share

This week I got to interview my daughter.  You've been hearing my experience of her addiction so I think that it's important to hear what her experience was like. Some of the things we talked about: 

· What was it like when I looked to you to be ok to make me feel better instead of me being stable for you?

· What else did I do that wasn’t helpful to you?

· What did I do that was helpful to you?

· Is there anything I could have done differently to help you not struggle with addiction?

· What did you get out of using?

· What made you want to get sober?

· What has relapsing taught you?

· What makes you feel supported in sobriety?

I learned a few new things and had some realizations while listening to her insight and I ended up sharing some things I've never shared before.

Resources From Heather Ross Coaching

New Support Group Starting in June

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Learn More & Sign Up For The Invitation To Change Group⁠

If you're interested in working with me Sign up for a 45-minute $17 Road to Recovery call using the link below

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://heatherrosscoachingcalendar.as.me/RoadtoRecovery⁠

GROUP COACHING PROGRAM –  Peace of Mind Group for moms
https://heatherrosscoaching.com/peace-of-mind-community/

GUIDE ABOUT ENABLING - If you've ever worried about enabling, this guide is for you!

https://heatherrosscoaching.com/perspective-about-enabling/

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow Heather on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/heatherrosscoaching

Follow Heather on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/heatherrosscoaching/

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join the free Facebook group for parents who are struggling with a child's addiction⁠⁠⁠⁠

Guests Joey Nakao and his moms Beth Syverson and Jan Mabie share from the heart their experiences and struggles with addiction and mental health. 17 year old Joey who is in early recovery is full of wisdom about relationships and connection and what a child struggling with addiction needs during active addiction and recovery.  What he shares is relevant to supporting your child of any age.  His mothers share how they've responded to Joey's active substance abuse and recovery, how they worked hard at being on the same page to support Joey, and how they kept their marriage healthy and happy as well. 

The 3 of them came together to create the Safe Home podcast to help other kids and families on their healing journey. Use the links below to listen and subscribe. 

If you want coaching about your child's addiction or anything else Sign up for a 45 minute $17 call with me using the link below

https://heatherrosscoachingcalendar.as.me/RoadtoRecovery

For additional resources:

GROUP COACHING PROGRAM –  Peace of Mind Group for moms
https://heatherrosscoaching.com/peace-of-mind-community/

Sign up for my free guide 3 Steps To Stay Sane When Your Child Is Struggling with Addiction - How to Move Forward With Confidence TODAY

http://heatherrosscoaching.com/3-simple-steps/

Follow me on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/heatherrosscoaching

Follow me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/heatherrosscoaching/

Link to my free Facebook group for parents who are struggling with a child's addiction

https://www.facebook.com/groups/434135437166166/?ref=share

SAFE HOME PODCAST: for struggling teens and their families finding their healing path. 17yo Joey Nakao and his moms Beth Syverson and Jan Mabie share from the heart their experiences and struggles with addiction and mental health.

Listen to Safe Home Podcast:

YouTube

Anchor

Spotify

Google Podcasts

Pocket Casts

Coming soon: Apple Podcasts

Connect with Safe Home:

Email us at [email protected]

Find us on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and YouTube

Support Safe Home on Patreon