Man Alive

By Shana JamesSociety & Culture Health & Fitness Philosophy Sexuality

Man Alive episodes

December 12, 2018 Find Your Leadership Blindspots Before They Compromise Your Effectiveness
You can lead from any position -- as a CEO, manager or employee. Learn surprising ways to be a more effective leader, rather than unknowingly lose power and respect at work.
34 min
December 05, 2018 Overcoming the Obstacles to Happiness – Reuvain Bacal

When you take stock of your life, asking yourself the simple question “Am I as happy as I want to be?” cuts to the heart of it all. This question helps you stop settling and orient toward what needs to happen so you can have a meaningful and inspiring life.
http://traffic.libsyn.com/manalive/happier-Reuvain.mp3
Show notes
As we get older, life becomes more and more complicated and multi-faceted.
I’ve realized though that there’s a simple question you can ask to take stock of your life.
Try asking yourself now. Here it is:
Am I as happy as I want to be?

What was you answer
Are you as happy as you want to be?
If not, what would make you happier?
I’m not going to the extreme to say every moment should be filled with joy or ecstasy, but I see men settle for much less happiness than I know is possible!
Even with the complications of career, family, romantic relationship, health and family you can orient yourself toward what makes you happy and fulfilled.
Today’s podcast guest and men’s coach, Reuvain Bacal, helps men be happier on the deepest levels. He has been efficiently and effectively working in the realms of limiting beliefs, challenging emotions, relationship patterns and purpose for more than a decade.
In this dense and powerful conversation we discussed…

* The most common causes of suffering for men and how to overcome them
* The matrix of personality and learning to respond from a truer place (This creates much less conflict!)
* What to do when you are stuck in an upsetting emotion
* How to navigate separation and connection in relationship — i.e. what to do when you’re afraid of being abandoned or suffocated
* How to find a purpose that inspires you and makes life worth living

If you’ve been struggling with any aspect of your life, listen to this conversation! We discuss some simple ways to get happier, more connected and on purpose!
Links:
Reuvain Bacal
Shana‘s Guide for you: 3 Ways Men Lose Influence at Work and With Women
Bio:
Reuvain is a transformational coach and psychotherapist helping men quickly identify and dismantle their obstacles to live inspired, fulfilled lives of purpose. He helps couples clear conflict and create loving, inspiring relationships. He lives with his wife and daughter on a homestead at the foothills of the Rocky Mountains outside of Boulder Colorado. Contact Reuvain for a breakthrough in your life and relationships.

43 min
December 05, 2018 Overcoming the Obstacles to Happiness
When you take stock of your life, asking yourself the simple question "Am I as happy as I want to be?" cuts to the heart of it all. This question helps you stop settling and orient toward what needs to happen so you can have a meaningful and inspiring life.
43 min
November 29, 2018 Reclaim True Power and Your Real Muse

Many men look in the wrong direction in an attempt create a life that feels good. When you find true power — power that does not depend on others’ affirmations — you can live an inspired and meaningful life.
http://traffic.libsyn.com/manalive/power-sol.mp3
Show notes
Most of us validate our worth (to some extent and often to a large extent) outside of ourselves.
We use our successes in work, romance, sex, finances, etc. to feel good about ourselves.
Why does this matter?
Well, if…
In order to feel sexy you need someone to find you sexy
In order to feel strong you need someone to see you as strong
In order to feel successful you need to attain a certain level of career or social status
…then your self-worth is fragile. It can come tumbling down when people and life situations don’t affirm you.
How can you feel good about yourself and create a life that is actually meaningful for you?
Today’s Man Alive podcast goes beyond the surface level social and political realms into the depths of inspiration, meaning and purpose.
Sol Sebastian, a sought after men’s coach who supports leaders personally and with business strategy, takes us on a wild tour of where men’s power and potency comes from.
In this conversation we discussed:

* What to do when your potency is being suppressed
* How to connect your sexuality to your truest self, rather than political or social agendas
* The need to stop seeing a woman (or a romantic partner) as the exclusive source of your fulfillment
* How to know whether a desire for sex or polyamory comes from a healthy place
* What it takes to wake up each morning with inspiration and a deeper sense of meaning

Sol has important perspectives on how to become more powerful and potent! I highly recommend listening to this conversation if you’ve ever felt less powerful or potent than you want to.
Links:
Shana‘s Guide for you: 3 Ways Men Lose Influence at Work and With Women
Bio:
Sol Sebastian is a leading authority and advocate for men to take action towards a greater life and understanding of their Creative Power and Potency. Combining both physical and energetic practices with a deep inquiry into the male psyche, he helps men to re-integrate their body, mind, heart and balls in order to live the most dynamic, authentic and empowered life possible.
Sol’s deep work in the fields of transpersonal psychology, hormonal science, physical training and integral therapies has been realized through formal training, as well as working up close and personal with thousands of men throughout Europe, the U.S., Australia, Asia and South Africa since the mid 90’s. After completing his Alchemy Of Man group program in 2012, he continues to coach men privately throughout the world, and will soon be launching his new program: The New Alpha Project – Men’s Transpersonal Development for Enlightened Leadership.
Sol currently lives in the USA with his wife Saida Desiléts, Ph.D, who is a leading authority in the field of Women’s Health and Planetary Evolution

38 min
November 28, 2018 Reclaim True Power and Your Real Muse
Many men look in the wrong direction in an attempt create a life that feels good. When you find true power -- power that does not depend on others' affirmations -- you can live an inspired and meaningful life.
38 min
November 21, 2018 How to Stop Love From Fading or Falling Apart – Guy Finley

Relationships are challenging! What if you had a lens to look through, where you could see your partner clearly, in a way that allowed for more love and connection? What if it helped you have have fewer fights and made it less likely you’d become one of the 50% of marriages that end? This conversation gives you that lens and helpful frameworks for a relationship that lasts!
http://traffic.libsyn.com/manalive/relationship-help-guy-finley.mp3
Show notes
If you’re satisfied with maintaining the average level of relationship, with the usual fights, conflict, resentment and baggage, this may not interest you.
But if you’re ready to take your romantic relationship (or any relationship really) to the next level — where it grows, deepens and evolves you — this week’s podcast is for you.
On today’s Man Alive podcast you’ll hear from teacher and author Guy Finley. He is one of those rare, wise people who sees SO clearly how things actually are, that it doesn’t make sense at first. I had to ask a lot of clarifying questions to really get what he was talking about.
But when you slow down and listen deeper, the depth of his knowledge and experience starts to shift your understanding to see that peaceful, deeply connected relationship is possible!
Guy has written more than 45 books and his latest book, Relationship Magic: Waking Up Together, blew my mind open to new and truer ways of loving.
In this inspiring and mind-opening conversation we discussed:

* The three stages of relationships and the gifts we receive from each (even when they don’t seem like gifts!)
* The 12 lessons that guide us to REAL LOVE
* The surprising truth about who is actually picking the fights, that allows you to stop them (not who you think!)
* The most important question to ask yourself in the midst of a relationship melt-down
* The original meaning of patience and how to apply it to deepen or save your relationship

Guy is giving a special audiobook bonus when you buy his new book, Relationship Magic. I highly recommend reading or listening to it. Find the link below.
Links:
Relationship Magic Book (Get the book + audio download here!)
Shana‘s Guide for you: 3 Ways Men Lose Influence at Work and With Women
Bio:
Guy Finley is the bestselling author of more than 45 books and audio albums on self-realization, including “The Secret of Letting Go,” “The Essential Laws of Fearless Living,” and his brand new book “Relationship Magic: Waking Up Together.” He is the founder and director of Life of Learning Foundation, a nonprofit Center for Spiritual Discovery located in southern Oregon where he gives talks three times each week. Guy is a faculty member at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, New York, 1440 Multiversity, and is a regular expert contributor to Beliefnet and the Huffington Post.

52 min
November 14, 2018 #IamResponsible: Men On a Path to Radical Self-Ownership – Boysen Hodgson

What does it look like to be fully responsible for yourself, including your action and inaction? Are you at all responsible for the shadow of men, even if you haven’t acted it out? How can you be a powerful, fulfilled man who courageously stands up for what he believes in?
http://traffic.libsyn.com/manalive/I-Am-Responsible-Boysen.mp3
Show notes
As a good man it can be challenging to know how, or what, to take responsibility for these days, especially in the cultural context of the Metoo and Time’s Up movements.
But what if this was a call to step into more responsibility and with it more power? True power!
Taking responsibility is a mature and powerful stance that can change your life. Letting go of the idea that “life happens to you” and seeing that, in many ways, you are creating your life is eye opening.
You don’t have to claim to have done something you haven’t done, but there are deeper layers of looking at your part in a dynamic. And a willingness to consider, if you haven’t played a role with your actions, whether you have with inaction.
Boysen Hodgson, Communication Director for the Mankind Project, joined me for this Man Alive episode to discuss the #IAmResponsible movement.
MKP is committed to individual and collective evolution, and supports men to take responsibility for creating the society they want to live in and share for the generations to come. They believe men can take responsibility for the GOLD and the SHADOW of masculinity, as creators and role models, victims and perpetrators.
In this deep conversation we discussed:

* The ‘old vs. new’ and ‘toxic vs. healthy‘ paradigms of masculinity
* The foundational teachings most men didn’t receive from their parents (and what to do about that)
* The root causes of current abuses, shootings and struggles men face
* How to turn the tide on men being isolated and “leading lives of quiet desperation”
* What men can do to support women, and claim responsibility, even when they are not the “bad guy”

This is an important conversation to have. I believe it wakes us up and makes new levels of connection and fulfillment possible, when we are willing to be courageous and look deeper into ourselves!
Links:
I Am Responsible
Shana‘s Guide for you: 3 Ways Men Lose Influence at Work and With Women
Bio:
Boysen Hodgson is the Communications Director for the ManKind Project USA, part of a global brotherhood of nonprofits conducting transformational initiation programs for men at every stage of life, and supporting a network of men’s groups serving over 10,000 men every week. He’s the author of “The New Macho,” a credo for the mature masculine shared over 50,000 times and published in numerous blogs, magazines and books. His mission is to transform culture by designing change and building bridges. Boysen completed the New Warrior Training Adventure in April 2004 and has been working with men ever since, supporting and challenging them to break out of isolation, take responsibility for their emotional riches, and live their full potential … starting with himself. He’s dedicated to nurturing the powerful,
41 min
November 14, 2018 How to Stop Love From Fading or Falling Apart
Relationships are challenging! What if you had a lens to look through, where you could see your partner clearly, in a way that allowed for more love and connection? What if it helped you have have fewer fights and made it less likely you'd become one of the 50% of marriages that end? This conversation gives you that lens and helpful frameworks for a relationship that lasts!
52 min
November 09, 2018 #IamResponsible: Men On a Path to Radical Self-Ownership
What does it look like to be fully responsible for yourself, including your action and inaction? Are you at all responsible for the shadow of men, even if you haven't acted it out? How can you be a powerful, fulfilled man who courageously stands up for what he believes in?
41 min
November 06, 2018 Save Your Relationship With Fierce Love – Terry Real

In a time when most people struggle in romantic relationships, as evidenced by over 50% of marriages ending in divorce, we need some serious guidance for how to make relationships work. The person who guides us has to understand the root causes of struggle and how both men and women approach intimacy. Internationally recognized Family Therapist Terry Real is a masterful guide!
http://traffic.libsyn.com/manalive/fiercelove-terry-real.mp3
Show notes
I will never give up on creating a successful romantic relationship, but wow can it be challenging.
From verbal communication to emotional connection, to feeling appreciated and understood, to keeping the passion and sexual connection alive…and that’s without even getting into finances, parenting, etc.
Do you get overwhelmed by all of this?
Gathering resources to support my clients to navigate the ups and downs of relational dynamics is something I do ongoingly. And these days I believe we need a no bullshit approach to relationship!
We can’t take it lightly that more than 50% of marriages end in divorce. Whether you’re married (or in a Long term relationship) now, or want to be in one in the future, this does not bode well. We have to start understanding how to keep relationships alive.
Today’s Man Alive podcast conversation was with a man who has been called “the most innovative voice in thinking about and treating men and their relationships, in the world today.” Terry Real is an internationally recognized family therapist who has spent decades working with thousands of individuals, couples and therapists.
In our conversation we covered

* What it takes to shift resentment into intimacy and connection
* How to navigate a relationship with an aggressive woman you “can’t win” with
* The necessary shift from Self-empowerment to Relational-empowerment
* The One up / One down approach to relating that too often keeps men isolated and unloved
* How the idealized masculine image presented by the patriarchy causes men to suffer

Not only did Terry teach and guide us in this conversation, but he was an example of powerful, open-hearted masculinity. He allowed himself to be vulnerable and was brought to tears by his relationship with his son and his son’s struggles.
Don’t miss this episode if you are in a romantic relationship or want to be in one!
Links:
Terry Real
Shana‘s Guide for you: 3 Ways Men Lose Influence at Work and With Women
Bio:
Terry Real is an internationally recognized Family Therapist, Speaker and Author. Terry founded the Relational Life Institute (RLI), offering workshops for couples, individuals and parents around the country along with a professional training program for clinicians wanting to learn his RLT (Relational Life Therapy) methodology. A family therapist and teacher for more than twenty five years, Terry is the best-selling author of I Don’t Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression (Scribner, 1997), the straight-talking How Can I Get Through to You? Reconnecting Men and Women (Scribner, 2002), and most recently The New Rules of Marriage: What You Need to Make Love Work (Random House). Terry knows how to lead couples on a step-by-step journey to greater intimacy — and greater personal fulfillment.
47 min

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If you're not satisfied with your love or sex-life, and could use some insights into what makes women want more of you, tell me more about yourself here and we'll schedule a time to talk: shanajamescoaching.com/consult