Marriage Rehab: Exposing Narcissistic & Emotional Abuse

What happens when your spouse looks like a “good guy” at church—but at home, you’re ignored, invalidated, and left carrying the whole family? In this powerful Marriage Rehab episode, Dr. David Hawkins sits down with Angela Coblentz (nurse and lay counselor) to share a 25‑year story of covert narcissism, emotional neglect, and the slow accumulation that finally becomes “neon.”

Angela describes early deception and spiritual cover‑ups, a marriage marked by absentee parenting and chronic ignoring, and the moment she realized her children were being sacrificed on the altar of a marriage that refused accountability. You’ll hear what emotional neglect can look like (hovering, shutdown, weaponized incompetence, image management), why over‑functioning wives burn out, and how church pressure to “forgive and move on” can unintentionally enable harm.

If you feel unseen, trapped by vows, or unsupported by faith communities, this conversation offers clarity, validation, and a safety‑first path forward—especially when kids are affected.

What happens when a marriage becomes emotionally entangled—one partner over-functions, the other under-functions, and both lose their sense of self? In this episode of Marriage Rehab, Dr. David Hawkins sits down with relationship specialists Chuck & Ashley Elliott to unpack emotional enmeshment, identity loss, and the “cardboard cutout” spouse dynamic (emotionally present in name only).

You’ll learn practical, actionable tools to rebuild connection—like how to save emotional energy for home, expand emotional language (especially for men), and interrupt conflict cycles with the Elliott’s “3 A’s to Change” (Awareness → Assess → Act). Plus, Chuck shares the powerful “buffalo vs. the storm” metaphor for leaning into hard conversations with humility and regulation—so couples can move from resentment and detachment toward healthy emotional intimacy (connection without losing individuality).

In this episode, Dr. David Hawkins sits down with counselor and author Laurel Slade-Waggoner to unpack gaslighting in everyday relationships—not only in marriage, but also in families, churches, friendships, and workplaces. Laurel shares her story, defines the “crazy cycle” (love bombing → manipulation → blow-ups → apologies → repeat), and explains why many survivors become trauma-bonded to the cycle.

You’ll learn how to spot future faking, the crucial difference between mere regret and authentic repentance, and why consistency and accountability—not box-checking—signal real change. Laurel and Dr. Hawkins outline faith-safe boundary strategies (internal and external), how to exit escalating conflicts without fueling them, and practical first steps for those who feel stuck, foggy, or frozen.

They also address spiritual abuse and unhelpful “stay and pray” advice, offering language to seek support wisely and rebuild a healthy inner circle. If you’re navigating narcissistic traits in a spouse, co-parent, or family member—and wondering what’s changeable and what isn’t—this conversation brings clarity, compassion, and a structured path forward.

Resources mentioned:
• Laurel’s books: Don’t Let Their Crazy Make You Crazy; Don’t Let Their Crazy Make Your Kids Crazy
• Marriage Recovery Center programs for narcissistic & emotional abuse

Need help now? Visit Marriage Recovery Center to explore assessments, intensives, and the Comprehensive Healing Pathway.

Founded by Dr. David Hawkins, the Marriage Recovery Center is the leading authority on the treatment of narcissistic and emotional abuse. To schedule your in-person or video session, call our team at (206) 219-0145 or email [email protected]

***Please note that Mad.In.Love welcomes guests with diverse viewpoints. Their beliefs do not necessarily reflect our mission at the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute, but we value open dialogue and exploration.***

When abuse shrinks you, how do you take up space again? In this episode of Marriage Rehab: Exposing Narcissistic and Emotional Abuse, clinical psychologist and bestselling author Dr. David B. Hawkins sits down with Kathy Young, a trauma-informed coach and survivor of a 35-year emotionally abusive marriage. Together, they unpack the survival strategy of “playing small,” the nuances of fawning, when gray rocking helps (and when it harms), and the trauma science (nervous system, polyvagal, complex trauma) behind exhaustion, hypervigilance, and losing your voice.

You’ll learn:

• What “playing small” looks like and how it forms under power & control
• Why fawning and gray rocking emerge as short-term survival tools
• Big-T vs. little-t trauma and how chronic micro-traumas “stack” neurologically
• The body cost of abuse (fight/flight/freeze/fawn/collapse) and first steps to reclaim choice & voice
• Practical, low-risk ways to take up space again

Guest: Kathy Young — trauma-informed coach & educator
Website: kathymcateeyoung.com

Programs & Support:
Marriage Recovery Center – Women’s Core & more: marriagerecoverycenter.com

If this episode resonates, you’re not alone. Healing is possible—one clear choice, one safe step, one reclaimed word at a time.

For more on Kathy’s work, visit her website at www.kathymcateeyoung.com or follow her on Instagram @kathyyoungcoaching. This episode offers invaluable insights and encouragement for anyone seeking hope and transformation.

Founded by Dr. David Hawkins, the Marriage Recovery Center is the leading authority on the treatment of narcissistic and emotional abuse. To schedule your in-person or video session, call our team at (206) 219-0145 or email [email protected]

***Please note that Mad.In.Love welcomes guests with diverse viewpoints. Their beliefs do not necessarily reflect our mission at the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute, but we value open dialogue and exploration.***

In this episode of Mad.In.Love, Dr. David Hawkins and Jonathan Glover tackle the  dynamics of therapist-client relationships in a special installment of "Dr. Hawkins’ Reacts!" With Katie Buckley as the producer, they dive into real-life Reddit stories that highlight common struggles in therapy, including clients repeatedly canceling sessions, the concept of therapist neutrality, and maintaining healthy boundaries between clinicians and clients.

Dr. Hawkins and Jonathan share their professional insights, offering guidance on how both therapists and clients can navigate these dynamics effectively to foster growth and trust. This episode provides a thoughtful exploration of the complexities in therapy relationships and offers valuable lessons for clinicians and clients alike.

Founded by Dr. David Hawkins, the Marriage Recovery Center is the leading authority on the treatment of narcissistic and emotional abuse. To schedule your in-person or video session, call our team at (206) 219-0145 or email [email protected]

***Please note that Mad.In.Love welcomes guests with diverse viewpoints. Their beliefs do not necessarily reflect our mission at the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute, but we value open dialogue and exploration.***

In this episode of Mad.In.Love, Dr. David Hawkins welcomes Sheila Wray Gregoire, author of The Great Sex Rescue, for an impactful conversation on challenging harmful evangelical teachings about sex and marriage. Sheila shares her journey into this work, including what inspired her to conduct the largest-ever study on evangelical women’s marital and sexual satisfaction.

Together, they delve into troubling beliefs uncovered by Sheila’s research, explore how these teachings contribute to harm and dissatisfaction in relationships, and discuss actionable strategies for reclaiming sexual wholeness—particularly for survivors of narcissistic and emotional abuse. Sheila also highlights key principles from her book that empower couples to build deeper intimacy and fulfillment in their relationships while fostering a broader cultural shift within the evangelical community.

Founded by Dr. David Hawkins, the Marriage Recovery Center is the leading authority on the treatment of narcissistic and emotional abuse. To schedule your in-person or video session, call our team at (206) 219-0145 or email [email protected]

***Please note that Mad.In.Love welcomes guests with diverse viewpoints. Their beliefs do not necessarily reflect our mission at the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute, but we value open dialogue and exploration.***

In this episode of Mad.In.Love, Dr. David Hawkins is joined by Ernest Hart, a seasoned clinician at the Marriage Recovery Center, to explore the complexities of family interventions in the context of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) and emotional abuse. Together, they discuss the unique challenges families face when attempting to confront destructive dynamics and the essential steps to stage a successful and compassionate intervention.

Ernest shares insights from his extensive experience working with families, offering practical advice on how to approach intervention with clarity, empathy, and firmness. This episode provides valuable tools for families seeking to create change and foster healthier relationships in even the most difficult circumstances.

Founded by Dr. David Hawkins, the Marriage Recovery Center is the leading authority on the treatment of narcissistic and emotional abuse. To schedule your in-person or video session, call our team at (206) 219-0145 or email [email protected]

***Please note that Mad.In.Love welcomes guests with diverse viewpoints. Their beliefs do not necessarily reflect our mission at the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute, but we value open dialogue and exploration.***

In this episode of Mad.In.Love, Dr. David Hawkins welcomes back Karla Downing, award-winning author, speaker, and founder of ChangeMyRelationship.com. In her previous episode, Karla shares powerful insights from her book 10 Lifesaving Principles for Women in Difficult Marriages, offering practical tools and wisdom for women navigating challenging relationships. In Part 2, Dr. Hawkins and Karla continue their conversation as they dive deeper into the topics they did not get to in the Part 1. 

Founded by Dr. David Hawkins, the Marriage Recovery Center is the leading authority on the treatment of narcissistic and emotional abuse. To schedule your in-person or video session, call our team at (206) 219-0145 or email [email protected]

***Please note that Mad.In.Love welcomes guests with diverse viewpoints. Their beliefs do not necessarily reflect our mission at the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute, but we value open dialogue and exploration.***

In this episode of Mad.In.Love, Dr. David Hawkins welcomes back Karla Downing, best-selling author, seasoned speaker, and founder of ChangeMyRelationship.com, for Part 2 of their insightful conversation. Karla, a marriage and family therapist passionate about helping individuals and couples break free from dysfunction and scriptural misconceptions, dives deeper into some of the critical issues discussed in their previous interview.

Together, they explore how scriptural misunderstandings can perpetuate unhealthy dynamics in marriages, including topics like submission, forgiveness without boundaries, and self-sacrifice. Karla also shares valuable insights on knowing and speaking one’s truth, overcoming fears to set boundaries, and the transformative power of “detaching in love” for women in emotionally abusive relationships.

This episode is packed with wisdom and practical advice for anyone seeking to navigate difficult relationships while remaining true to themselves. Don’t miss this empowering discussion!

Founded by Dr. David Hawkins, the Marriage Recovery Center is the leading authority on the treatment of narcissistic and emotional abuse. To schedule your in-person or video session, call our team at (206) 219-0145 or email [email protected]

***Please note that Mad.In.Love welcomes guests with diverse viewpoints. Their beliefs do not necessarily reflect our mission at the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute, but we value open dialogue and exploration.***

In this episode of Mad.In.Love, Dr. David Hawkins is joined by Dr. Carol Tanksley, author of Sexpectations, and MRC clinician Jill Stenerson to discuss the intersection of sexual intimacy, emotional abuse, and narcissistic behaviors in relationships. Together, they explore what healthy intimacy looks like, how to heal from sexual harm caused by abuse, and practical steps toward sexual wholeness. Whether you're recovering from past trauma or navigating challenges in your current relationship, this episode offers hope and guidance for your journey.

Founded by Dr. David Hawkins, the Marriage Recovery Center is the leading authority on the treatment of narcissistic and emotional abuse. To schedule your in-person or video session, call our team at (206) 219-0145 or email [email protected]

***Please note that Mad.In.Love welcomes guests with diverse viewpoints. Their beliefs do not necessarily reflect our mission at the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute, but we value open dialogue and exploration.***