The Art of Charm

Master Your Attachment Style and Accelerate Your Success | Dr. Judy Ho


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In today’s episode, we tackle attachment with Dr. Judy Ho. Dr. Ho is a clinical neuropsychologist and a tenured professor and researcher at Pepperdine University, works as a forensic expert and media consultant, and last time she joined us to talk about her book, Stop Self-Sabotage, and today, she's back to talk about her latest book, The New Rules of Attachment: How to Heal Your Relationships, Reparent Your Inner Child, and Secure Your Life Vision.


Everyone knows how attachment styles influence romantic relationships, but how do they hold you back in your career, why do you need to understand your attachment style to build healthy relationships, and what can you do to change your attachment style and raise children with secure attachment styles?


What to Listen For
  • Introduction – 0:00
  • What is attachment theory and what are the 4 attachment styles?
  • How do parenting styles produce different attachment styles in their children? 

    • How to avoid raising insecure children – 13:14
    • What do you need to avoid to raise children to have a secure attachment style? 
    • If you have an insecure attachment style, what can you do to change it to a secure attachment style?

      • How do you change your attachment style – 20:13
      • What can you do to break the pattern of avoidant attachment and develop a secure attachment style?
      • What are the strengths and weaknesses of the avoidant attachment style?
      • How do I connect with an avoidant attachment style?

        • The secret to living with an insecure attachment style – 33:14
        • What simple 10 second exercise can you do to accept your attachment style while you’re working to change it so it doesn’t sabotage your relationships?

          • How to deal with your partner’s attachment style – 40:23
          • What can you do if you’re putting in a lot of work to understand your attachment style and your partner’s, but your partner isn’t interested in doing the same work?
          • What are you supposed to do when a family member’s attachment style creates conflict with yours? 

            • Breaking free of your avoidant attachment style in your career – 49:33
            • How does your avoidant attachment style sabotage your career and your ability to advance?
            • Should everyone be striving to have a secure attachment style?

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