Mindfulness Mode

Nurture Your Soul With Creativity is the topic of today’s show. Think back to the happiest times of your life. Does there seem to be any connection for you between your most creative times and your happiest times? For me, as a musician, I’ve had some of the happiest times of my life creating music, or teaching music to others and helping them learn to be creative.

I’ve done some research on this topic of creativity and I’ve come up with five conclusions I’d like to talk about today. I’m curious to hear what you think about creativity. Send me an email at [email protected]

Creativity is a skill that can be learned. You don't need to be an artist or musician to be creative, you can use your creativity in everyday tasks like cooking, cleaning, gardening, or organizing.

Use Osborn’s Creative Problem Solving technique with brainstorming in between the steps as follows:

1. Clarify and identify the problem – Pretend that the problem is not that important

Complex problem solving requires some step-by-step action. You have to think about it and use your knowledge and experience to come up with solutions.

Your work experience can help you a lot and the knowledge you have gained in your education. From there, bring your emotion into play by allowing your mind to go to a story or incident that happened in your life where your emotions were triggered. Allow yourself to use empathy and imagination as you relax and let your mind go wherever it chooses.

A formula you might want to use would be: imagination + creativity + empathy + innovation = Problem Solving

Look around you. Think of the people you know. Do the more creative people seem to be more successful in your circles? Well, in my opinion, creative peioke tend to be more passionate about their work and I think that leads to more discoveries, more advancement, and more great relationships at work.

Creative ppl tend to ask the question ‘What if” frequently, allowing their mind to explore possibilities. From what I’ve read about Elon Musk, I think he used his ‘what if’ mentality to ask himself what would happen if he created a company that would make commercial space flight possible? His companies are built around what could happen if creativity was the key factor.

Creativity reminds me of a quote by Pablo Picasso. He’s known for saying, “Every child is an artist, the problem is staying an artist when you grow up”.

It’s important for adults to continue to massage their creativity so we don’t become too left brain dependent and forget about the thrill we get from life when we allow our creativity to play an active role.

Creative people have better relationships for several reasons. For one, they are often more motivated compared to less creative people. Creative people tend to be more relaxed and easy-going and that quality means they are drawn to people looking for a comfortable, relaxed, non-threatening relationship 

Noticing emotions and being able to express those emotions is another quality common in creative people. People with this quality will be more sensitive to your feelings and needs than a person who is not considered to be creative. 

Does it make sense to you that creative people live longer? I think creative people are happier, and I believe it makes sense that happier people live longer.

I know in my case, I’m a lot happier when I’m doing creative activities compared to when I’m spending my time on what I would consider non-creative activities.

The topic of creativity has come up a lot in my interviews on Mindfulness Mode, and just as an observation, I’ve noticed that health and creativity seem to be aligned.

There are studies about this topic and a study from 2012 researched veteran men. The researchers, Turiano, Spiro and Mroczek, followed 1,349 veterans for over 10 years . They looked at their intellect and creativity. They rated their creativity based on these five words: creative, imaginative, artistic, innovative, and uncreative.

Turiano, one of the researchers, concluded that, creativity may reduce the risk of dying because it would enable the veterans to, “better confront the problems associated with increasing age and declining health and may have important effects on slowing cognitive aging.” (p. 666).

Turiano also suggested in his conclusion, “that promoting creativity throughout the life course, and especially at older ages, may delay the cognitive and physical health declines associated with normative aging.” (p. 669).

Turiano wanted to warn readers to be cautious in how you draw your conclusions from the study. He explained that the results only suggest that self-ratings on select adjectives predict mortality risk. That means that the people in the study rated themselves based on the creative words from the study.

I found the study interesting. Maybe you’ve read some books or read some studies on this topic. If you have, I’d love to hear from you. I realize that more studies would need to be done for the science to absolutely conclude that more creative people live longer.

As a kid, I would spend hours with my accordion strapped to my chest, playing songs, some of which I made up myself. When I thought the song was ready for a performance, I’d play it for my father, who was always eager to hear me play. He was crazy about the accordion. Although he was a man of few words, I could tell by the proud look on his face that he was impressed and amazed at the songs I made up.

He would smile, look over at my mom, and say, “Bruce has always been the creative one”.

The definition of creativity varies, but most experts agree it has to do with the ability to come up with new ideas, new connections between ideas, and novel solutions to problems, with or without hours of experimental accordion playing. Here’s the thing, forget the image of a moody Beethoven, sitting alone in an apartment in Vienna. Research suggests that creative people are actually happier than everyone else.

So you might be thinking, I’m not a musician, a dancer, a poet – no problem. Experts say creativity lives within all of us, it’s just a matter of allowing it to come forward.

In the book called, “The Creativity Cure”, author Dr. Carrie Barron says, “It really has to do with open-mindedness.” She says creativity applies to everything from making a meal to generating a business plan.

But whether creativity means coming up with your version of a delicious stuffed chicken breast, or a tasty crepe of some kind, or maybe singing operatic choruses for your friends, experts say there’s a strong connection between how much you exercise your creativity and your overall wellbeing.

In other words, creativity is good for you.

I interviewed the CEO of BrambleBerry.com. Her company offers soap making supplies and a lot more. Her name is Anne-Marie Faiola, and one of the things she said was, “Joy for me is creativity, because creativity is essential.” In our discussion on her episode, www.MindfulnessMode.com/243, Anne-Marie makes it clear how vital her creative side is in both her professional and personal life.

Another person who talks about creativity is Dr. Shelley Carson. She has researched creativity and she talks about using creativity to solve problems. Dr. Carson says that, “increases in positive mood broaden attention and allow us to see more possible solutions to creative problems.”

Dr. Carson wrote a book on creativity called, “Your Creative Brain: Seven Steps to Maximize Imagination, Productivity, and Innovation in Your Life”

I want to share with you one of the most meaningful books related to creativity that I’ve read in a long time. The book is called, Squircle – that word came from combining the word Circle, which represents creativity or right brain thinking, and the word Square, which represents left brain thinking. The author of this book is Francis Cholle, and I interviewed him in February of this year. I highly recommend his book and the interview as well. It’s called, A New Way To Think For A New World, by Francis Cholle . It’s episode 639, so go to www.Mindfulness Mode.com/639.

Here are some things Francis recommends in his book to help develop your creative side. He says, change your routine in the morning, explore new foods for breakfast or other meals. Search for a new route to travel to work or school. Listen to different radio shows, podcasts, or audio books.

One of the things I’ve concluded from what I’ve read and the people I’ve interviewed is that people who have creative personalities tend to have a lot of perseverance and they actually look for things in their life that will create interest and make their lives more fun. Individuals with these traits are more satisfied with their lives than less creative people.

It’s important to note that people are the most creative when they’re in a good mood, possibly because they don’t fixate on individual pieces of information and they are able to think more broadly and more positively.

• Book: The Creativity Cure: How To Build Happiness With Your Own Two Hands by Carrie Barron

• 243 Creativity Is Essential to Brambleberry CEO, Anne-Marie Faiola

Tom Cronin is passionate about reducing stress and chaos in people’s lives. A former finance expert with a longstanding successful track record in business as well as meditation, Tom is the founder of The Stillness Project, a global movement to inspire one billion people to sit in stillness, daily. Tom has written a number of books, including his recent publication, The Portal: How Meditation Can Save The World. Tom Cronin’s ongoing work in transformational leadership and cultivating inner peace through meditation takes him around the world presenting keynote talks in such countries as Malaysia, Indonesia, Australia, Mexico and the USA.

• Website: www.EnterThePortal.com

• Thom Knoles, Meditation Teacher

•  Regarding my emotions, being able to watch them and ask me, is this the vibration I want to be emanating out into the world, and then to work on transcending that emotion and being in peace.

• Breathing is like this song, Chariots of Breath, that friends of mine wrote. Breathing becomes this supporting device to instil calmness.

• Book: The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

• I think we're all bullies or being bullied sometime in our life in some way. Maybe as a dad at some point I may have been a bully. Maybe as a husband I may have been a bully.

• 059 Sleepwalking, Marriage and Meditation Insights with Dr. Gay Hendricks

Mindfulness, Memory, and Moodiness is the topic of today’s show. Have you noticed that people you interact with lately are more moody than you remember? Does it seem like there are more people you’re exposed to who are experiencing depression, discouragement, a lot of feelings of negativity? How about you? Do you seem to be 

Well, I talk about that inner bully quite a bit and the reason is because those negative self-voices play a big role in a lot of peoples’ lives. Mine included.

This is the perfect day to talk about moodiness, your inner bully, and how that self-talk is related to mindfulness.

Well, it is. Mindfulness is all about how we think. Yes, thinking in the present is mindfulness, but there’s so much more to it than that..

Many of our thoughts are connected to our memory. Every time we decide to do something, we depend on our memory to know how to do it. We depend on our memory to know whether we’ve just brushed our teeth, or whether we were about to start.

You might not have thought about it before, but our memory has a lot to do with how we see ourselves, how we define ourselves as a person.

A lot of the ideas I’m sharing with you today are from Lisa Genova who is a neuroscientist and has written a book called, “Remember: The Science of Memory and the Art of Forgetting”.

A lot of the time, we tie our well-being to memory. We think our brain is healthy and thriving if our memory is sharp and the opposite is true. If we feel like we’re forgetting things, we start to wonder about our brain health and even our mental health.

Yesterday morning I got dressed, came downstairs and was about to get in my car to drive to my studio and I realized I didn’t have my wallet. “Where on earth could it be”, I wondered. The crazy think was, I knew I’d had it a few minutes before that because I remembered dropping it on the floor. Some credit cards and id fell out on the carpet and my memory was crystal clear … I knew I bent over and picked them up and put them back in my wallet.

But now my wallet was missing and I’d already searched the kitchen, all my pockets, I’d gone back upstairs twice, and still no wallet.

There are times when I would have thought to myself, “I must be brain–dead, or am I losing my memory? This time I just kept looking. I went back upstairs with my son and we both looked. Suddenly I spotted it sitting on a brown footstool where I absolutely never leave my wallet. I realized I must have set it there without thinking as I grabbed some books to carry downstairs.

That’s when I started to wonder if the pandemic is affecting my brain. According to Lisa Genova, the answer is definitely yes.

There are two main reasons why the pandemic is messing with our memory. The first reason has to do with the way our brains are wired and the second reason is related to stress and how our brains deal with stress.

The first reason has to do with how our brains are designed to remember things. When we remember what is meaningful, our brains go to “what is new? What is emotional? We don't remember the same old habitual routines. So this is why you might remember your first date, but not your 10th.

I don't remember the details of brushing my teeth this morning or taking a shower. It's the routine things we don't remember. And so here we are in a pandemic, and many of us are confined to our homes, we’re going out way less. We’re not able to go to concerts and plays and movies and dinners and parties like we did pre-pandemic. Those are the sorts of things that make memories and that, for many of us, give us a ZEST for life.

We get excited as we look forward to these more exciting events, we enjoy them as they happen, and of course, that’s mindfulness. Enjoying the moment and just taking it in, feeling the emotions and being there. And then we enjoy the after buzz, the feeling of elation of having recently enjoyed something different, something we were looking forward to.

And so now that many of our lives are more mundane, our brains are forgetting. A lot of us don't know what day it is anymore, because every day is the same. So that's the first part of this.

So the second reason, like I mentioned, has to do with stress. The way we’ve evolved as a species is that we are designed to deal with short, quick examples of stress. Like suddenly you’re being chased by a lion, we instantly move into a fight or flight response.

We’re designed to deal with that like any other emergency, a quick reaction. Our brains and bodies to react INSTANTLY to this kind of emergency, this kind of threat. So your brain and body go into sudden, immediate, action. Adrenaline and cortisol kick in. The body’s response mobilizes glucose, and your muscles immediately have extra power, more strength.

Your brain actually stops thinking because it’s not a time to weigh the pros and cons of what's going on before you run away or face the predator. You just instantly act. And then once the threat is over, assuming you've survived, the cortisol, which got turned on by this event, then acts on receptors in your brain to shut the whole sequence off.

So what happens when we experience chronic stress? Well Lisa Genova explains what happens. And this is what we've been dealing with this past year. For many, the threat of Corona Virus, the need to be constantly wearing masks, keeping socially distant, hearing regular news reports about new threats of COVID19 and of people dying. For a lot of people, all that adds up to stress.

In fact, without realizing it, a lot of us are experiencing chronic stress. So it's not suddenly a predator chasing us, it’s a constant threat of danger. It's in our thoughts and we become so used to it, that we don’t even realize it. The top three major psychological stressors are:

I know, for me, I’ve been experiencing all three of these. The effect is cumulative. We can handle it for a while, but now it’s been over a year and according to Lisa, the feedback loop can “break the receptors of your brain that normally cortisol acts on to shut off.”

We get a hit of cortisol and normally the stress is gone and we go back to being a relaxed human again. Instead of that, your body just keeps dumping adrenaline and cortisol, adrenaline and cortisol.

A little bit of stress can help you rise to the challenge of whatever you’re doing – like if you have a meeting with a big client, or you have an exam. In those cases you need to be a little bit stressed so that you’re on your game, you’re ready for action. You’re focused. And if you’re driving and a deer or a moose suddenly runs across the road in front of you, you get a hit of cortisol.

So, during fight and flight, the adrenal glands produce catecholamines. They’re created in the brainstem and the brain.

So in the morning we need a certain amount of alertness and what you might call stress to meet your day. But chronic stress is bad for your memory all the time. So this is why you might feel super foggy – you aren’t able to retrieve information that you know is there, information you’ve learned and you know is in your brain.

So continued STRESS will actually shrink your hippocampus. And you might know that your hippocampus is part of your brain. And your hippocampus is where new memories are formed. Continued stress will make it smaller.

Now here’s where mindfulness take a role. Things like exercise, meditation, yoga, deep breathing, being in nature – all those things we’re talking about on Mindfulness Mode – they all have been shown to increase the size of your hippocampus. They stimulate neurogenesis. All of the above mindfulness-related activities cause the birth of new neurons.

We can take control and do things to combat the fact that we can't get rid of the pandemic, but we can individually change our brain. We can change our brain's response and our resilience to what’s going on in the world. We can save our brains and our memories from being vulnerable to the stress that the pandemic creates.

I talked to my son Ben, about memory and he reminded me of an episode on Youtube by Vsauce – The episode is called Illusions of Time. 

Anyway, Vsauce talks about how we remember the times of our life that are eventful, things we enjoy, places where we’re having a good time. Then when we look back, it seems like those times passed slowly. He brings up a lot of interesting ideas about memory and a lot of this is linked to mindfulness, even though at first you might not realize it.

Now let’s talk about sleep. Not only are a lot of people experiencing stress, so many people are having sleep issues as well during this pandemic. It’s all related.

Here are two things that happen while you sleep.

1/ Your Brain is binding your thoughts into long-term memory.

So a lot of people think of sleep as just an unconscious state of doing nothing, but your brain is actually very busy while you sleep. And so here's, what's going on in your brain – all of the events that happened today, everything you learned and experienced today that you want to keep, that you paid attention to, that was meaningful and emotional, – all of those things are what your hippocampus is going to bind into a long term memory. Your hippocampus does that job while you sleep primarily. And so if you don't get a full night's sleep, you'll wake up the next day and your hippocampus won't have had enough time to finish its job. And so your memories either won't be fully formed or they might not be formed at all.

And so you won't really remember very clearly what happened yesterday. If you're exhausted today, because you didn't get a full night's sleep, you'll also be feeling low and lacking energy and you won't be able to pay attention. You’ll notice when someone's talking to you, you’re hearing the words, but you don't know what they’re actually saying. You’re having an attention issue. You’re feeling like you’re not able to focus on what's going on. You’re not going to remember it later because it’s not possible for your brain to form a memory of it.

2/ While you sleep, the glial cells are cleaning up.

Lisa Genova explains that the glial cells are like janitors. She says they're the sewage and gestation department. They are busy clearing away all the metabolic debris that accumulated during the business of being awake.

One of the things the glial cells clear away is a protein called amyloid beta. And if the Amyloid beta is not cleared away, here’s the problem. It's sticky and it will bind into itself and form plaque. And if you accumulate enough amyloid plaque, you will trigger Alzheimer's disease.

So a good night's sleep is helping you prevent getting Alzheimer's. She emphasized that this point is not to freak people out. This does not happen overnight. It takes 15 to 20 years of amyloid plaque accumulation to trigger Alzheimer's. So the science tells us that if we’re getting on average, seven to nine hours of sleep, we’re doing great. That's what we need.

My mother-in-law's brain was always sharp. She had an unbelievable memory and she didn’t miss anything it seemed. She did puzzles and word games, she exercised most days, she was always interested in new ideas and concepts.

Even though she was in her 80’s it was like she had the brain of a 30-something. She always would ask me lots of questions about a new on-line project I was doing, or a conference I was speaking at.

I know that some people do puzzles and word games to exercise their brain and hopefully avoid dementia or Alzheimer’s. Lisa Genova says this doesn’t help avoid Alzheimers. This isn’t the way the brain works. Doing those kinds of activities gives your brain practice at retrieving information, which is good.

Lisa explains that what really helps keep our brains vibrant and help us potentially avoid memory problems is when we are constantly learning new information. That’s completely different from retrieving information.

You can continue to learn anything in your whole life. You could learn to speak Spanish, learn to play a new musical instrument. Learning new skills and gaining new information is what really benefits our brain in a huge way.

When the Pandemic ends, you can go on a vacation, visit a new city, and meet new people. And all that will help keep your brain active and fresh and filled with new memories. But don’t be surprised if you still forget some of the simplest things, like the reason why you walked upstairs.

Back in 2017, I interviewed a memory expert. His system is called the Magnetic Memory Method. His name is Anthony Metivier, and his interview is available at www.MindfulnessMode.com/248. He talked about our memory and stress and he explained that “it all begins with recognizing and then overriding overwhelm”. He teaches how to learn new languages and memorize poetry and basically supercharge our memories. Check out his episode. He’s a fascinating man with great ideas about mindfulness and memory.

Let's be mindful, and not judge and shame ourselves over forgetting things that our brain is not wired to remember in the first place. Don’t panic and be so fearful if you forget things because forgetting is a normal part of being human.

Now that you know how mindfulness and memory are connected and how we can help avoid moodiness, depression, and stress by using exercise, meditation, yoga, deep breathing, and being in nature. All those things will boost the size of your hippocampus. Wow, that gives us control. 

• Book: Remember: The Science of Memory and the Art of Forgetting by Lisa Genova

248 Discover the Magnetic Memory Method; Dr. Anthony Metivier

381 Understand The Quantum Orchestra of Your Brain; Dr. Stuart Hameroff

284 Discover The Better Brain Solution; Dr. Steven Masley

Chelsea Austin is a writer, speaker and advocate from Malibu, California raised by two of the most incredible parents, her dads. Chelsea has used her expertise in theatre and dance and used her story of being raised by two gay men, using it as a platform to spread love, tolerance and acceptance. Chelsea has advocated for the LGBTQ+ community since she was in high school and in 2010 was voted one of the Top Fifteen LGBT Activists in the Los Angeles area. Chelsea shares her message with the world on her blog, “The Girl With Five Names,” her podcast, “Worthiness Warriors,” and through speaking engagements.

• Website: www.ChelseaAustin.com

• Gabby Bernstein Bestselling author, motivational speaker, spiritual leader, and podcast host

• Mindfulness has allowed me emotional literacy. It has allowed me the time it has taken to recognize that I feel an emotion and that there's something in there.

• Breathing is huge. As someone who has been short of breath many times in life, a thirty second breath is something that saved me.

Book: Super Attractor: Methods for Manifesting a Life beyond Your Wildest Dreams by Gabby Bernstein

App: Dr. Chris Lee on Instagram – He talks about the neuroscience behind mindfulness

• I was bullied, but never because I had two dads. I grew up in Las Angeles, born and raised in Malibu. I was known as the girl with two gay dads and that was my selling point. It was something I wore like a badge.

• 169 Gay Pride, Mindfulness and Bullying Talk; Matt Marr

Strengthen Your Hope Muscle, is the name of today’s episode. What is hope anyway? What does that word mean to you? Hope can be defined as a feeling, state of mind or belief that something good will happen. Whether it's in the future or right now, hope has many benefits for your mental health.

On this episode, I'll explore some of these benefits and then talk about some specific ways you can train your brain to operate with hope!

There’s a phrase you might have heard, especially if you’re in business or you’re an entrepreneur. It’s Hope marketing is when you see what others are doing in your marketplace or in another marketplace and you try and repeat it. You try to take what you see others applying successfully and copy it with the hope that it will work for you.

Although the word hope isn’t in the quote, I think this quote by Thich Nhat Hahn is relevant: “In order for one to have true peace of mind, he or she must be able to let go of everything—to give up any attachment whatsoever.”

Jon Kabat Zinn says that “hope is not an emotion but rather something more active and engaged-a way of being present in life.”

Her name is Dr. Rosalind Tompkins and it was an absolute honor to spend close to an hour talking with this inspirational woman.

She spent 12 years, from age 12 to 24, addicted to substances, and then she was able to pull herself up and carve a positive life out where she was helping and inspiring hundreds and thousands of other people. She had HOPE. She thought it, she acted on it, and she lived it. Then she founded the non-profit organization, Mothers in Crisis, Inc., an organization committed to linking families and communities together to provide networks of support and encouragement for families to live productively, empowered, hope-filled lives. She wanted to help mothers who were addicted like she had been. She wanted to give them hope and a new lease on life.

Make it a habit to consistently take breaks that focus on hope. Do this everyday and it will become natural and easy.

Breathe and relax. Take five to ten deep deaths and enjoy the peace, being quiet and alone. Once you breathe and get the rhythm flowing, enjoy the space.

Begin to think, I'm going to make it. The doors are going to open. Think of the most positive outcome that could possibly happen. See it in your mind's eye.

Make affirmations and say it out so your ears can hear what you're saying.

Continue to repeat this process as often as needed. Once you begin to do this, it's amazing how much easier it becomes. 

• Book: As Long As There is Breath In Your Body, There is Still Hope by Dr. Rosalind Tompkins

474 When Hope Is Your Only Option; Triple Transplant Recipient Jim Stavis

628 Hope For Recovery With Author Hope Andersen

443 Film, Fitness and Food Heals; Allison Melody

Michael Defern is a singer/songwriter, author, and video producer. He first became interested in mindfulness and awakening through the Twelve Steps, a tool he used to help maintain sobriety. Fifteen years later, Michael has sought to expand mindfulness into all parts of his life, including business, performing, writing, and raising kids. He owns a video production company with his wife, Heather, where they help business owners create content that digs deeper to connect with their audience, which is the subject of his recent book, How To Connect: A guide to creating content that resonates with your ideal client.

• Website: www.MichaelDefern.com

• Eckhart Tolle

• Mindfulness has been a life-changer in terms of communicating with my wife. There were so many things, especially financial things, where I would come at it in such a passive-aggressive way.

• I need to plug my amazing vocal teacher, Breck Alan. One of his breathing exercises is something I use all the time in mindfulness and meditation.

• Book: The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

• I definitely was bullied. And I bullied. My whole school experience from grade school to high school was one of being completely disconnected in my own head.

• 487 Build Better Relationships With Author Bryan Falchuk

How To Release Your Inner Bully Dialogue is my topic today. How many of us have a bully on our shoulder? Someone who is always telling us how we should be doing things and what we could do better. You know, the one that says you are not good enough or smart enough for something. The one that criticizes your topic and believe it is more every move and makes you feel like an idiot when you don't live up to their expectations. The negative self-talk reminds you of all your faults and flaws, even when they are scarcely true. It can seem impossible to stop listening to these voices in our head! But it's possible with some practice – if only we knew where to start.

What holds a lot of us back from achieving our goals is often ourselves. We can be held hostage by our own thoughts.

The first step is to notice those inner bullying voices. I once had a temp job where I did quality control for a credit card company. A woman who worked alongside me was constantly critical of me in a passive aggressive way. She would say things like “did you really have to wear that today,” and she wouldn't even look at the clothes I wore or she would accuse me of not coming back from break on time. It got so bad that people talked about her behind her back when they came into work in the morning. The worst thing for me was how passive aggressive she could be without ever actually saying anything to my face but everyone knew what she thought of me because of how much negativity would pour out of her mouth on a daily basis.

The way this fellow employee carried on, reminds me of exactly how my inner bully behaves. There are sneaky, negative messages just under the surface that I may or may not notice. Thinking back to my temp job helps me to realize that my inner bully is real. I’ve named him Jasper. Giving him a name and an identity helps me remain aware that he’s constantly lurking in the back seat. Every once in a while I tell Jasper off, and tell him to stay in the back seat, mind his own business, and that I am doing the driving.

This works for me. It keeps Jasper where he belongs.

I’m an action taker and I’ve always found that taking action as soon as possible gives me the momentum to make things happen that are positive. Sometimes I don’t take the time to focus on what I want to achieve before I take action, so I have to remind myself to create an outline that tells me where I’m going. You might say I’m setting goals, you might say I’m setting a destination.

Two years ago I had a coaching client who told me she had never been one to set goals. She said she always thought goals were for people who weren’t action takers, and she said for her, goals were just a waste of time. But then she told me she got an assignment in her graduate program that required her to set a goal and put it into writing. She kept procrastinating on the project until the night before it was due.

After hours of thinking up different ideas, she finally came up with something that was really meaningful for her and she thought her prof would like it. She went on to tell me that this was one of her biggest wins during her university years. She somehow glued her goals just inside her purse so that everytime she opened her purse, she’d be reminded of what she wanted to achieve.

By the end of her degree she had achieved every one of those goals, and she said it taught her the value of setting goals and sticking to them. After that, she used the system on a regular basis and got used to the feeling of setting goals and making them reality. She told me that hiring a mindfulness coach was actually one of her goals, and that she had listened to dozens and dozens of my episodes before deciding I was the right person to be her coach. Anyway, choosing a direction in life is critical, and making sure it’s front and foremost in your mind on a daily basis is also a must.

Like I said, for me, taking action is critical and I think the sooner you do it, the better it is. That is, as long as you’ve set goals, like I mentioned already. Taking action means being willing to do the tough stuff first. Brian Tracy wrote a well-known book called, Eat That Frog. It’s all about beating procrastination. The whole point of the book is to do the toughest stuff first.

What is the thing you really want to put at the end of your list, what do you want to do list? Consciously make the decision to do that item first. Eat That Frog. Jump in, tackle the tough stuff, confront the most undesirable activities first, and then you’ll start to feel like you have some momentum. This really works. It’s not easy and nobody ever said it was. It’s challenging to dig in and do the nastiest jobs first. But once you get into the habit of doing this, then it feels like you can sail through everything else. Those other tasks can seem like a pleasure, like a joy because you know you’ve already accomplished the most miserable jobs.

Your body and mind aren’t separate. Your mind is motivated to think positively when your body is in action. Your body is motivated to move when your mind is thinking positive thoughts. That’s what I think anyway.

I’m thinking back before the Pandemic. I was at the gym, going through my normal routine when I noticed a man across from me. He had curly hair and intensely focused eyes. His muscles were huge and he was lifting a lot of weight. I remember noticing how confident he looked and how easy it seemed to be for him to lift all that weight. I remember thinking how motivated he must be to be lifting that kind of weight and to have built the muscles he had.

One day we started talking and he told me he’d been in an accident and the physiotherapist got him working out and eventually suggested he get a gym membership and a trainer. He told me that once he started with a trainer, his life fell into place and he started feeling good about himself and started to achieve some of his goals. He said he was constantly plagued with negative self-talk – he called it ‘bad attitude’ and lack of confidence’. When I used the term ‘Inner Bully’ he lit up and said, Yeah, that’s exactly what it is. He told me that he runs on a regular basis now and that helps him stay positive.

I believe that whatever your routine is to keep moving, it’s important to make it a habit and stick with it. In January of 2020 I started walking every day, at first for 45 minutes and then I upped it to an hour. Since December I’ve been running for an hour every day. It’s incredible how it clears my mind, helps me stay focused and gets me set for the day. It definitely helps me shake my inner bully.

If you LISTEN/ SET GOALS / and TAKE ACTION, you’ll look over on your shoulder, and instead of seeing a bully on your shoulder, you’ll see a Coach. Your own personal, positive, upbeat coach, cheering you on, giving you a boost, and helping you feel confident day after day. Don’t get me wrong, it doesn’t just happen. It’s up to you to make it happen. And you’re well on your way.

So remember – stay in the mode – Mindfulness Mode.

• Book: Eat That Frog: 21 Great Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time by Brian Tracy

058 Getting Centered and Wiping the Mind Clean with Greg Zuffelato

050 Movement, Meditation and Mindfulness with Courtney Townley

516 Live Up To Your Potential; Natalie Sisson

aphali Anderson struggled through a lot of pain in life, believing the lie that success makes life better, happier, and more fulfilling. Even achieving levels of success still left him with the haunting feel that his life was somehow empty. After years of study, and trial and error, he finally found the missing ingredient. As a result, his marriage went from shambles to rock solid; he lost over 30 pounds and gained a new level of content. His circumstances didn’t change, he just became aligned with his true self. Now, Naphali wants to empower others to take full control and master their lives, living with purpose, passion, and fulfillment.

• Website: www.NaphtaliAnderson.com

• Jesus

• Mindfulness has given me strength over my emotions.

• I just actually started doing more breathwork. Being at home with my body and just treating myself as a whole, breathing is very powerful. In controlling your state and your energy, breathing is very effective.

• Book: The Bible

• I've been bullied and I've been a bully. Where mindfulness would have made a difference. Something that bothered me, and some may say this is such a small thing. I was with my older brother.

• 530 Win The Hour Win The Day; Kris Ward

If you’ve listened to any of my solo episodes before, you’ve heard me say that journaling and writing is therapeutic. It helps you become clear in your goals and figure out how to achieve them. Scientists have done research on this topic and believe it is more 

When I was a kid I used to keep a diary. My dad liked to write and he would write entries in his journal every day. He was a farmer, so he was particularly interested in the weather. It truly mattered in his work so as a result he became an expert at reading the sky. He was particularly intrigued by what he could learn from the sunsets. He was usually sleeping when the sun came up because he wasn’t an early riser, but he loved to watch the sun go down.

I’ve put together five easy steps for getting started with journaling or writing.

When I was younger I used to draw and colour and just live in the moment with this hobby. As a kid I had a lot of coloring books and I took great pride in finishing a coloring page. My pens, pencils and markers were some of my most important possessions. I suggest you find a special pen that you truly like, one that feels perfect in your hand.

2/ Write The Date

Open your journal and write the date on the top of the page. Do you have a special journal? If you don’t, you’ll find lots on Amazon or in a store that carries that sort of thing. Make sure to always keep your journal in a special place so you never have to wonder where you’ve left it. Your journal will become a special possession.

Write three things you're grateful for today. Don’t over think it. Just write the first thing that comes into your mind, even if it seems trivial, or painfully obvious. Turning your mind to gratitude is a great way to make your journaling time special and a positive experience.

Try writing about something that makes you uncomfortable. This is usually an easy way to get the words flowing. These can be thoughts, feelings, or memories. It’s often simple to think of things that are irritating. It will get you started and then you can switch over to something more positive like my next point.

5/ Five Goals

Write out five goals for this week that will make you happy when they're achieved. Don’t put unnecessary pressure on yourself. Choose goals that you will definitely enjoy achieving, even if you automatically do them every day. The purpose here is not to make you feel stressed, but to build your writing confidence. It’s important to enjoy the process.

Dr. James W. Pennebaker says that “The act of not discussing or confiding the event with another may be more damaging than having experienced the event in the first place.”

Here’s what I encourage you to do. Over the next five days, I want you to write about your deepest emotions and thoughts about the most upsetting experience in your life. Really let go and explore your feelings and thoughts about it. In your writing, you might tie this experience to your childhood, your relationship with your parents, people you have loved or love now or even your career. How is this experience related to who you would like to become, who you have been in the past, or who you are now?

After doing this for five days, I bet you’ll be surprised how your perspective on life has changed. Email me at [email protected] and let me know how this journaling activity worked for you.

There are other benefits of journaling that I haven’t mentioned. Writing down a series of events can help you remember something important. If you’re anything like me, I usually think, oh, I’ll remember this thing that happened, and then a day later I’m struggling to remember the details. Just write it down when it’s fresh in your mind. The act of writing it down will also help you relax. Your subconscious mind will know that you no longer have to remember all the details because you’ve recorded them.

There is one benefit that can be achieved through writing therapy which few people know about; healing from trauma. There is a study that found participants who wrote for 15 minutes four days in a row showed significant progress when compared with those doing other activities like watching TV or reading magazines (Smyth & Pennebaker)

• Book: Book: Opening Up by Writing It Down, Third Edition: How Expressive Writing Improves Health and Eases Emotional Pain, by James Pennebaker and Joshua M. Smyth.

097 Journaling Can Turn Our Adversity Into A Heightened State of Mindfulness; Kim Ades

549 Marketing and Copywriting Expert; Steve McChesney

528 Get Stoked With Writer, Aubree Nichols

186 Time Hacking and Mindfulness With Writer Benjamin Hardy

144 Write of Your Life Using Mindfulness With Stacy Brookman

027 Nirmala: Be curious and discover who you are through mindfulness and meditation

Lee Baucom believes you can thrive regardless of what life gives you. Lee holds a Ph.D. and is a Thriveologist and Life Coach. For the past three decades, he has studied how people thrive, applying that information in his writing, teaching, and coaching. He is the author of seven books, three focused on how to thrive. And he is the creator of the Thrive Journal, a daily process to steadily increase thriving in everyday life. Lee is also the host of the Thriveology Podcast, providing weekly lessons and interviews on thriving since 2013. As a teacher and speaker, Lee discusses the importance in finding meaning and living purpose, so that people create the impact desired in life.

• Website: www.Thriveology.com

• Jack Canfield

• It's easy to be present when you're in a good mood. My challenge is when I'm upset about something. It's not like you're saying I'm not upset. Mindfulness is saying, ok, I'm upset, now what do I do about it.

• I've always been very interested in breath and breathing. In my childhood I did Taekwondo and my instructor was always talking about doing diaphragmatic breathing.

• Book: Eckhart Tolle Books

• I was probably the antithesis of a bully. I was Mr. Nice Guy for a long time.  That was something that I really tried to live into and anything that challenged that was difficult for me. We had moved about a year before and I didn't have a lot of friends.

• Practical No BS Self-Love With Blake D. Bauer