More Than Fine

Is it abuse? It's not uncommon for abuse survivors to miss the signs of abuse – but why does this happen? Michelle talks about the tricks abusers use to keep victims in a fog of confusion, and shares a tool you can use to figure out if you are or have been in a toxic relationship. She discusses why couples counseling with an abuser is a bad idea and what to do when you're afraid to speak up, expecially when no one around you believes you.

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One thing all bad relationships have in common: Unhealthy boundaries. So what do you do when what you're doing isn't working? Michelle explains a simple method for setting healthy boundaries (that Jesus taught His disciples) and suggests what you can do when you feel like a relationship isn't healthy for you. She also shares one thing you can do today to start setting better boundaries (no awkward conversations required).

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Loneliness often feels like it's out of our control because let's face it- it involves relationships with other people. But what if it's not out of your control? And what if there's something you can do about feeling forgotten, rejected, and overlooked? Michelle shares about a Valentine's Day date gone bad, and what it revealed about the connection between loneliness and toxic relationships. She also shares how one shift of thinking can prepare you for a healthy relationship and keep you from settling for someone who's not a good match for you.

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How do you love someone who is hurting you? Jesus told us that we would have enemies– people who are actively trying to hurt us– but He also told us to love them. But what if your ex is your enemy? What if you've done all you can, but being nice to them just hasn't worked? Michelle shares why being nice to your enemies doesn't work, and the one thing you should do instead to love your enemies (without being treated like a doormat).

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Welcome to the Christian Single Moms Podcast! 

Becoming part of a church community can be difficult and triggering. Church abuse and other negative experiences can leave us feeling like we don't belong. Ericka Andersen discusses the process of healing from traumatic church experiences and how to find a community where you belong. She discusses the importance of both pulling away from a hurtful situation to process pain and later re-engaging in spiritual community, and offers guidance in how to find people you can be safe and vulnerable with.

Purchase Ericka's book, Reason to Return

Learn more at ErickaAndersen.com

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RECOMMENDED EPISODES

E140- When Church Isn't Safe: How Abuse Survivors Can Find Safe People with Mary DeMuth

E125- Children, Trauma, & Abuse: Helping Your Child Recover When You're Healing Too with Justin Holcomb

Burnout. We've all felt it. There's so much we have to do (and sometimes with so little) that it sucks the joy right out of life. Jennifer Watson talks with us about the connection between burnout and the expectations placed on us (and the ones we place on ourselves). She discusses how to rediscover joy in taking a step back to reassess what things we are called to and what things need to come off of our plates. She also shares how to say "no" and deal with the disappointment others will inevitably feel when we make our own needs a priority.

Learn more about Jennifer at JenniferReneeWatson.com

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RECOMMENDED EPISODES

E141- Big Emotions, Discipline, & Mom Guilt: How Boundaries With Our Kids Make Us Better Moms with Rachel Norman

E145- Good Boundaries: Loving Others Well Without Losing Yourself with Lysa TerKeurst

Victims often have a hard time having their voices heard, especially in a church environment where hurt has happened. Dr. Scot McKnight shares what safe churches look like, and how churches with what he calls a "goodness culture" respond to the wounded and marginalized. He also discusses telltale signs of unsafe churches and leaders, and what to take note of if you are trying to find a new church home for the first time. Scot also offers encouragement for victims of abuse who want to share their stories but aren't sure if it's safe to do so.

Purchase Scot's book, A Church Called Tov

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RECOMMENDED EPISODES

E112- Decoding the Narcissist: Exposing the Faces of Narcissism to find Freedom from Emotional & Spiritual Abuse with Chuck DeGroat

E105- Am I Safe? Experiencing Physical, Emotional, and Spiritual Security after Abuse with Sarah McDugal

Mixed emotions, anyone? Hurt and loss make the holidays super complicated, and figuring out how to be grateful in the midst of all of it can feel so overwhelming and unfair. Michelle addresses a listener question asking "How can I be grateful when all I feel is grief?"

Record your question for a future POP Questions episode, or submit your question by email

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RECOMMENDED RESOURCES

When the Holidays Hurt: Grieving Through the Holidays as a Single Parent Blog Post

Un-Happy Holidays: What To Do When You Feel More Miserable than Merry Blog Post

E104- Thank You, I'm Sorry, Tell Me More: Words that Hurt, Words that Heal with Rod Wilson

Grief is hard to work through when we don't understand it. And it often seems that no matter what we try, both our everyday lives and the holidays are full of triggers that keep bringing our grief to the forefront. Clarissa Moll shares why the traditional thinking of grief as stages or a journey isn't helpful, and instead offers an understanding of grief that helps us extend more compassion and grace to ourselves. She discusses the difference between "moving on" and "moving forward" and provides practical tips for dealing with grief during the holiday season.

Learn more at ClarissaMoll.com

Purchase Clarissa's book, Beyond the Darkness

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RECOMMENDED EPISODES

E120- Life Can Be Good Again: Loss & Lack Transformed By the Goodness of God with Lisa Appelo

E114- Grieving & Letting Go: The Role of Acknowledging Pain in Embracing Your Future with Dr. John Delony