No Alcohol Needed: The Podcast

By Julie Miller & Steve KnappSociety & Culture Health & Fitness Mental Health Education Self-Improvement Philosophy

No Alcohol Needed: The Podcast episodes

February 06, 2023E22: Sober Dating: The Good, The Bad, The Awkward
"Dating sober isn't any easier."

If you've ever dated sober, or intend to start dating sober, this is the episode for you! We turn the show over to five of our friends who are all active in the sober dating world, and give them a chance to tell all. They talk about everything from dealing with getting rejected and breaking up, to recognizing red flags and deal breakers, to the awkwardness of sober intimacy. Listen and laugh with us... and you'll probably learn some things along the way, too!

Some of the topics we cover:
Online dating apps
Being uncomfortable when your date drinks
Your date being uncomfortable when you don't drink
Recognizing an unhealthy need for attention and validation
Learning to communicate honestly and effectively
Addressing a partner's substance use
Higher standards for conversation and connection
Struggling with insecurity
The older you get, the harder it seems to get
Showing up authentically, flaws and all
Taking things slowly
Learning to appreciate solitude
Learning to cope with loneliness

"Sometimes the wrong person feels right."

Meet Our Guests:

My name is Derrick Deidel I will have 3 years sober on 02/24/20202. I have come from the depths of addiction, trauma, mental health , prison and homelessness to be a light in this world. I love recovery and am a huge advocate for it and those seeking help. I work for Mile High Recovery Center managing the Residential treatment house, I am a peer recovery coach and personal trainer. I try to be kind and gracious to everyone cause that same stuff changed my life.

Chris Wallace Age: 36
Lives in Los Angeles
East coast transplant who runs up and coming pizza restaurant, @ozzysapizza, in Los Angeles while balancing the day job grind, comedy aspirations, and full time dog dad duties. Grateful every day that sobriety allows me to do everything that I truly love.

Liz is a native North Carolinian whose journey to recovery began when she saw a post featuring a sobriety-app screenshot from a celebrity she didn’t know she was following while drunkenly scrolling Instagram. After decades of using alcohol to cope with depression, anxiety, loneliness, and despair, she’s now learning to get comfortable with the uncomfortable so she can better show up for her son, her dogs, the world at large, and herself.

Melissa has been practicing sobriety for several years and has had nearly a year completely alcohol free. She lives in the Blue Ridge Mountains of North Carolina with her puppy dog where she works as a beer rep, artist, musician, and is currently pursuing a graduate degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling. She is passionate about grief and trauma therapy, delightfully existential conversations, nature, and awkward humor

Corina D is a Canadian educator currently living and working in Edmonton, AB with her two rescue feral pharaohs. A full-time compassionate soul whose real journey of discovery (recovery) began at the bottom of an emotional heap in Cairo after the collapse of her volatile second marriage. She has been known to wander in broad day light carrying a bright lantern earnestly searching for truth and honesty.

Share Your Thoughts!

throughtheglassrecovery.com

[email protected]

Instagram – @through_the_glass_recovery
41 min
January 30, 2023E21: I Quit Drinking... Now What?
If you've quit drinking, and you're wondering... "What now?" you're going to love this episode. We are joined by Dan, Melissa, and Kelsey to talk about gaining forward momentum in recovery. From learning how to ask for help, to understanding that your needs and tools evolve with your recovery, doing the work is the foundation of sobriety. We discuss dealing with boredom in sobriety, and we talk about how exciting it can be to face the hard things, knowing something great will be on the other side.
Doing the Work: Keep Practicing Until Your Natural Emotional Response is a Healthy One
Some of the points we make in this episode:
Find a community and ask for help
Remember to take life one day at a time
Tell your truth, and accept feedback
Watch others, and learn from their experiences
Be willing to ask yourself hard questions
Beware of complacency
Milestones can sometimes be triggering - be prepared for them
Our needs change and evolve with our recovery, and that's okay
Find the lesson in every experience
Let yourself be truly seen
Shame can't live in the light
In this episode, Julie talks about how the book Rewired by Erica Spiegelman helped move her recovery journey forward. You can learn more about Erica, and her many recovery resources, by visiting www.ericaspiegelman.com
Dan mentions Brene' Brown, whose research and books are helpful for anyone looking to understand themselves better, whether in recovery or not. Visit her website at www.brenebrown.com
Meet our guests:
Melissa has been practicing sobriety for several years and currently has nearly a year completely alcohol free. She lives in the Blue Ridge Mountains of North Carolina with her puppy dog where she works as a beer rep, artist, musician, and is currently pursuing a graduate degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling. She is passionate about grief and trauma therapy, delightfully existential conversations, nature, and awkward humor.
Keep In Touch!
throughtheglassrecovery.com
[email protected]
39 min
January 23, 2023E20: The Value of Honesty in Recovery
How honest are you, really?

Have you ever hidden a bottle of alcohol from your partner and worried all day that they'd find it? Told someone you'd quit drinking, but just hid it from them instead? Have you ever told the hair dresser you love your new style, when inside you're cringing?

Honesty seems easy... until we really get honest with ourselves. In this episode, we talk with Brian, Antje, and Michal, with special guest Corina, about honesty in recovery. Most of us consider honesty to be an important value in our lives, but the more we dig into it, the more we realize the places where we tend to be more dishonest than we thought - lying to make others feel better, lying by omission, lying to ourselves. Listen as we dig into honesty, and talk about some of the areas we struggle, and what we've learned.

Other areas of honesty in recovery that we discuss in this episode include:
Being brutally honest with ourselves is the foundation of recovery
Can honesty be self-serving?
Lying about likes/dislikes to fit in
Saying "I'm fine" when we're not
Misplaced honesty and vulnerability
Perfectionism - omitting truths to maintain the "perfect" appearance
Lying is based in shame and fear
Taking the time to discover our own truth
There's an enormous sense of freedom in being honest
Lying to avoid hurting others' feelings or disappointing them
In-depth discussion about journaling effectively as a sobriety tool

"Awareness of the problem is the first step to the solution."

In the introduction to the topic, Julie mentions the book Rewired by Erica Spiegelman. Rewired is the book that Julie used to jump-start her recovery journey. For more information about the book and the author, visit www.ericaspiegelman.com

We'd love to hear from you!

throughtheglassrecovery.com

[email protected]

Instagram – @through_the_glass_recovery
48 min
January 16, 2023E19: Saying No (Without Feeling Guilty)
In this episode, we chat with Antje, Kelsey, and Sonia about overcoming people pleasing and learning how to say no. It's easy to want to keep everyone else happy, but we do so the expense of our own happiness. We agree to things we don't want to, out of fear that we will disappoint others, and the result is that we disappoint ourselves.

Some of the points and topics we cover include:
Over-explaining ourselves
Finding out who really supports our recovery
Honoring ourselves by making our own decisions
Choosing authenticity over meeting expectations
Allowing others to say no to us, also
Not apologizing unnecessarily
Getting angry at ourselves for letting others walk all over us
Fear of disappointing others (and then realizing that's their problem.)
Start with easy conversations to practice for the hard ones
Demonstrating to our kids and others that saying no is okay
Learning to honor ourselves, our feelings, and our wants
Learning to sit with discomfort
Learning to avoid engaging in toxic conversations and behaviors
Dealing with the consequences of saying yes when we didn't want to
Pausing before responding to allow ourselves time to think
Valuing our time enough to say no

Saying yes when we really want to say no leads to resentment.

As Kelsey says, "I was everything to everybody and nobody to myself." Recovery is a great time to take back your time and energy and use it in a way that honors ourselves!

Meet our guests:

Kelsey started a TikTok account to share her sober journey and inspire others. Since she started, she's gained 23,000 followers. You can find her at https://www.tiktok.com/@kelseygoessober and on instagram at https://www.instagram.com/kelsey_sorensen_/

Sonia is the creator and owner of Ever Blume, a recovery resource that places members in small support groups based on their specific needs and situations. For more information, visit joineverblume.com or visit Sonia's Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/joineverblume/

Keep in touch!

throughtheglassrecovery.com

[email protected]

Instagram – @through_the_glass_recovery
38 min
January 09, 2023E18: Dealing With Alcohol Cravings and Triggers
In this episode, we explore different ways to cope with alcohol cravings and triggers. We've invited Keith, Summer, and Melissa to share their experiences and wisdom, which includes developing mental strength, exercising self compassion, and eating ALL the junk food. We talk about learning how to lean on others to get through the hard times, allowing ourselves to just be uncomfortable sometimes, and we also learn how to check in with ourselves and ask, "What is my body actually needing right now?" Because if we find healthy ways to meet our needs, we won't feel so compelled to use alcohol.
Alcohol cravings are our body telling it that it needs something. Our job is to figure out what it needs.
Other topics we explore in this episode include:
Breaking routines
Learning to sit with cravings instead of acting on them
Staying mindful
Recognizing our danger zones and learning to ask for help
Building relationships with others so we have support
Playing the tape forward
Embracing ourselves as we are; self compassion
Developing tools and coping mechanisms
Learning new ways to respond to feelings
Meet our Guests:
Keith Williamson can be found creating inspiring sober content on Instagram @soberinspirationbykeith and on YouTube at https://www.youtube.com/@soberinspirationbykeithwil4419
Let’s get connected!
throughtheglassrecovery.com
[email protected]
Instagram – @through_the_glass_recovery
34 min
January 02, 2023E17: Finding Hope After Addiction
In this episode, we are joined by Peter, Jessica, and John and we share about finding hope after addiction. We share how we maintain hope even when things get hard. You'll hear us talk about looking back to see how far we've come, and looking forward to the future, being able to recognize the potential. We discuss how we gained hope from others' stories, and how that inspires us to share our own. Hope is what keeps us going, even when we aren't sure it's worth it.

Hope means allowing others to show us that the hard work is worth it.

Other topics covered in this episode include:
How community and connection influence hope
Knowing when you're ready to quit
Taking time to reflect, to acknowledge how far you've come
Listening to stories of people further along
Sharing our own stories to give hope to those who are struggling

Jessica talks about This Naked Mind by Annie Grace, a favorite book in the recovery community. Find out more about it at https://thisnakedmind.com/

Meet Our Guests

Peter can be found @youre_better_than_the_steps on Instagram where he shares inspiring content related to sobriety. Go check him out!

Jessica tells her story on Instagram @imperfect_sobermom - it's honest, relatable, and real. Follow her as she navigates early sobriety and shares her experience with the world.

Let’s get connected!

throughtheglassrecovery.com

[email protected]

Instagram – @through_the_glass_recovery
38 min
December 26, 2022E16: How Friendships Change in Sobriety
Sobriety is the pathway to authentic friendships

In this episode, we talk with Debs, Brian, and Ben about how our friendships have changed in sobriety. When we quit drinking, one thing we worry about is how our relationships and friendships are going to change. It can be intimidating. Will we be any fun to hang out with anymore? Will our friends support our decision? Are we going to lose friends? Listen as we share our experiences with all of these questions, and a lot more.
How we've inspired others by being honest about our recovery
Learning to let go of friendships that no longer serve our values
Discovering new and more meaningful friendships
How we make new friends now that we are sober
Discussing how our standards for friendships have grown
How we are better at being good friends
Realizing that vulnerable, meaningful conversation creates true connection
Honoring ourselves by saying no and being careful about choosing what events we attend

What we end up realizing is that we used to drink to feel like we fit in. Now we share our sober, authentic selves and we learn where we truly belong. As Brene Brown says, "Fitting in is the greatest barrier to belonging."

Get in Touch!

throughtheglassrecovery.com

[email protected]

Instagram – @through_the_glass_recovery
40 min
December 19, 2022E15: Setting Healthy Boundaries in Recovery
In this episode, we talk with Jane, Nat, and Elaine about setting boundaries in recovery. It turns out, all five us were raised without ever understand what boundaries are, so we've had to learn all about them in recovery. We talk about our successes and our failures, and share bits of wisdom learned along the way. Some of the topics we cover include:
Putting sobriety first by setting personal boundaries
People pleasing - diminishing ourselves by failing to set boundaries
Say "I'm sorry" with intention
Learning to not make others' needs and expectations more important than our own
Realizing that saying no doesn't make you a bad person, it just saves you from overcommittment.
Setting boundaries saves us from harboring resentment
Creating healthy boundaries about how we treat and talk to ourselves
How we honor and enforce our boundaries, even when it gets painful

Boundaries teach people how to treat us.

We may have grown up believing that boundaries are optional, but in recovery, boundaries are absolutely required.

Meet Our Guests:

Elaine Skylar Neal is a website designer and content creator with over two years of sobriety from alcohol.
https://www.championcreatives.com/

Join in the conversation! We'd love to hear from you.

throughtheglassrecovery.com

[email protected]

Instagram – @through_the_glass_recovery
40 min
December 12, 2022E14: Recovery Out Loud
In this episode, we talk with Derrick, Liz, and Corinna about what it's like to go public with recovery - what we sometimes call "Recovering Out Loud". We cover topics such as
Getting over the fear of judgement
Working to change the stigma of addiction
Being an example to show others it can be done
Deciding where it's safe to share your story, and where it might not be
Gaining the opportunity to connect with others in sobriety
Knowing that it's okay to recovery quietly, too

When we're proud of all of the work we've done in recovery, and when start reaping the benefits, we often find we want to share our stories. LIsten as we share our experiences of recovering out loud.

Let's get connected!

throughtheglassrecovery.com

[email protected]

Instagram - @through_the_glass_recovery

Special thanks to Derrick https://www.instagram.com/ddeidelsoberfit/ for his contribution to this episode! Be sure to check out his inspiring reels on Instagram and follow him for some great sober content!
35 min
December 05, 2022E13: Dealing with Regret in Sobriety
In this episode, we talk with Kate , James, and Lacey about how we deal and cope with regret in sobriety. We talk about ways we've changed our focus from the past to the future, to allow ourselves to heal.

Move from the past to the future
Focus on gratitude for being alive
Focus on gratitude for the opportunity to change
Be proud of who you are now
Work to show the people you love that you are no longer the person you were before
Accept blame where appropriate
Deal with shame by sharing your story with others who won't judge you
Work to forgive yourself by treating yourself as though you are a friend.

Learning to put the past behind us in a healthy way allows us to truly value and look forward to the future. We owe it to ourselves to give ourselves the freedom to move forward!

Join in the conversation:

throughtheglassrecovery.com

[email protected]

Instagram - @through_the_glass_recovery

Get to know Kate on Instagram @Walking_The_Straight_Line
39 min